Praise for You Deserve Each Other “This book is the perfect dose of sweet, hilarious joy. It’s masterful comedy plus tenderness, unique voice plus rich characters. Nicholas! Swoon! We are in love.” —Christina Lauren, author of The Honey-Don’t List “Laugh-out-loud funny and heartfelt, You Deserve Each Other is one of my favorite books of the year.” —Jennifer L. Armentrout, author of Wait For You “An achingly sweet and laugh-out-loud funny story about how the road to happily ever after is rarely a straight, smooth ride. Anyone who has ever been in a relationship will recognize a part of themselves in this book. Packed with emotion, humor, and sexy tension, this book is a welcome punch straight in the feels.” —Lyssa Kay Adams, author of The Bromance Book Club “A sharp and witty look at how relationships take work to succeed, and how being true to yourself and each other is at the very core of a romantic connection. Earthy, authentic, and laugh-out-loud funny. I read this in one sitting. A refreshing and unputdownable debut!” —Samantha Young, author of Fight or Flight “A snarky heroine, wickedly funny banter, and a cast of quirky characters make this a laugh-out-loud read.” —Maisey Yates, author of Secrets from a Happy Marriage “I could not get enough of this fresh, insightful, and totally hilarious book! Sarah Hogle is a master of comedic dialogue and sexual tension; she had me rooting for Naomi and Nicholas from the very first page.” —Kristin Rockaway, author of How to Hack a Heartbreak “Laugh-out-loud funny and a love story with incredible heart. I absolutely loved You Deserve Each Other.” —Katie McGarry, author of Echoes Between Us Copyright Published by Piatkus ISBN: 978-0-349-42433-0 All characters and events in this publication, other than those clearly in the public domain, are fictitious and any resemblance to real persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental. Copyright © 2020 by Sarah Hogle The moral right of the author has been asse;rted. All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted, in any form or by any means, without the prior permission in writing of the publisher. The publisher is not responsible for websites (or their content) that are not owned by the publisher. Piatkus Little, Brown Book Group Carmelite House 50 Victoria Embankment London EC4Y 0DZ www.littlebrown.co.uk www.hachette.co.uk Contents Praise for You Deserve Each Other Title Page Copyright Dedication Prologue Chapter One Chapter Two Chapter Three Chapter Four Chapter Five Chapter Six Chapter Seven Chapter Eight Chapter Nine Chapter Ten Chapter Eleven Chapter Twelve Chapter Thirteen Chapter Fourteen Chapter Fifteen Chapter Sixteen Chapter Seventeen Chapter Eighteen Chapter Nineteen Chapter Twenty Chapter Twenty-One Acknowledgments For my husband, Marcus, and for our children. You’re my happy place. I think he’s going to kiss me tonight. If he doesn’t, I just might die. It’s our second date, and we’re parked at a drive-in theater pretending to watch a movie while sneaking looks at each other. This movie is two hours and five minutes long. We have spent one hour and fifty-five minutes not kissing. I don’t want to sound desperate, but I didn’t contour a third of my body with this much highlighter to not get any of it on his shirt. If all goes according to plan, he’s going to be limping home tonight with ravaged hair and enough shimmer powder on his clothes to make him reflective to passing cars. He’s going to smell like my pheromones for a week no matter how hard he scrubs. I haven’t been shy with the hint-dropping, drawing attention to my lips by licking, nibbling, and idly touching them—advice I got from Cosmopolitan. My shiny lip gloss was developed in a lab to magnetize the mouths of men, effective as fanning peacock feathers. Nicholas’s primitive instincts won’t be able to resist. It’s also a magnet for my hair and I keep getting the eye-watering taste of extra-hold hair spray in my mouth, but sometimes beauty requires sacrifice. On top of all this, my left hand drapes across my seat palm-up for maximum accessibility in case he’d like to pick it up and take it home with him. My hopes begin to wither when he looks at me and then quickly away. Maybe he’s the kind of person who goes to the drive-in to actually watch the movie. As much as I’d hate to consider it, maybe he’s simply not feeling this. It wouldn’t be the first time a smooth-talking charmer dropped me off with a good-night kiss and ghosted right when I thought things were getting good. And then I see it: a signal that eating my hair all night has not been in vain. It arrives in the form of an empty mint wrapper sitting in the cup holder. I subtly sniff the air and heck yes, that is definitely wintergreen I smell. I check the cup holder again and it’s even better than I’d thought. Two empty wrappers! He’s doubling up! A man doesn’t double up on mints unless he’s preparing for a little move-making. My god, this man is so handsome I’m half convinced I somehow tricked him into this. I like every single little thing about Nicholas. He didn’t wait three days to call after the first date. All of his texts are grammatically correct. I have yet to receive an unsolicited dick pic. Already, I want to reserve a ballroom for our wedding reception. “Naomi?” he says, and I blink. “Huh?” He smiles. It’s so adorable that I smile, too. “Did you hear me?” The answer to that is no, because I’m over here admiring his profile and being way too infatuated for it being so early in our … I can’t even call this a relationship. We’ve only been on two dates. Get it together, Naomi. “Zone out a lot?” he guesses. I feel myself flush. “Yeah. Sorry. Sometimes people talk to me and I don’t even register it.” His smile widens. “You’re cute.” He thinks I’m cute? My heart flutters and glows. I give an inner thank- you speech to my false eyelashes and this low-cut (but still classy) blouse. He cocks his head, studying me. “I was saying that the movie’s over.” I whip my head to face the screen. He’s right. I have no idea how the movie ended and couldn’t tell you what the major plot points were. I think it was a romance, but who cares? I’m much more interested in the romance happening here in this car. The lot is now deserted, granting us enough privacy to make my imagination go wild. Anything could happen. It’s just me, Nicholas, and— The pink cardigan folded neatly on his back seat, which obviously belongs to a woman, and that woman isn’t me. My stomach drops, and Nicholas follows my gaze. “That’s for my mother,” he says quickly. I’m not quite convinced until he shows me a HAPPY BIRTHDAY card beneath it, which he’s signed and added a personal message to. Love you, Mom! I inwardly swoon.