The Project Gutenberg EBook of Wit and Mirth: or Pills to Purge Melancholy, Vol. 5 of 6, by Various This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org Title: Wit and Mirth: or Pills to Purge Melancholy, Vol. 5 of 6 Author: Various Editor: Thomas d'Urfey Release Date: September 21, 2008 [EBook #26679] Language: English Character set encoding: ISO-8859-1 *** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK WIT AND MIRTH, VOL. 5 OF 6 *** Produced by David Newman, Linda Cantoni, and the Online Distributed Proofreading Team at https://www.pgdp.net. Music transcribed by Linda Cantoni. Transcriber’s Note This e-book is volume 5 of Thomas D’Urfey’s Wit and Mirth: Or Pills to Purge Melancholy, published in six volumes in 1719-20 by J. Tonson, London. It was prepared from a 1959 facsimile reprint by Folklore Library Publishers, Inc., New York, of an 1876 reprint (publisher unidentified). The 1719-20 edition was published in two issues. The first issue was published under the title Songs Compleat, Pleasant and Divertive; the second, under the Wit and Mirth title. The 1876 reprint apparently used a combination of the two issues, and volume 5 bears the Songs Compleat title. Moreover, the 1876 reprint was not an exact facsimile of the 1719-20 edition, as the typography and music notation were modernized. For more information on the various editions, see Cyrus L. Day, “Pills to Purge Melancholy,” The Review of English Studies, Vol. 8, No. 30 (Apr. 1932), pp. 177-184, available at http://www.jstor.org/stable/508831 (login required). Midi files have been provided for the songs in this e-book. To hear a song, click on the [Listen] link. Lyrics within the music notation are set forth in text below the music images. Archaic and inconsistent spellings and hyphenation have been preserved as they appear in the original, except that “VV” is rendered as “W.” The original order of titles in the Alphabetical Table has also been preserved. Obvious printer errors in both text and music have been corrected. Some words in the first song are rendered in the original in blackletter font. They are rendered here in bold italics. WIT and MIRTH: OR PILLS TO PURGE MELANCHOLY EDITED BY THOMAS D’URFEY IN SIX VOLUMES VOLUME V FOLKLORE LIBRARY PUBLISHERS, INC. NEW YORK 1959 This edition is a facsimile reproduction of the 1876 reprint of the original edition of 1719-1720. Copyright © 1959 Printed in the U.S.A. by Noble Offset Printers, Inc. New York 3, New York title page S o n g s Compleat, Pleasant and Divertive; SET TO M U S I C K By Dr. John Blow, Mr. Henry Purcell, and other Excellent Masters of the Town. Ending with some Orations, made and spoken by me several times upon the Publick Stage in the Theater. Together with some Copies of Verses, Prologues, and Epilogues, as well as for my own Plays as those of other Poets, being all Humerous and Comical. VOL. V. L O N D O N : Printed by W. Pearson, for J. Tonson, at Shakespear’s Head, against Catherine Street in the Strand, 1719. A N Alphabetical T A B L E O F T H E S O N G S and P O E M S Contain’d in this B O O K . A B C Page A LL Christians and Lay-Elders too, 1 As I went by an Hospital, 29 A Shepherd kept Sheep on a, 35 As I was a walking under a Grove, 37 A Councel grave our King did hold, 49 A Heroe of no small Renown, 56 As the Fryer he went along, 58 A Bonny Lad came to the Court, 88 A Pox on those Fools, who exclaim, 91 Amongst the pure ones all, 105 As Oyster Nan stood by her Tub, 107 Ah! Cælia how can you be, 111 Are you grown so Melancholy, 118 As Collin went from his Sheep, 122 A Wife I do hate, 173 A Thousand several ways I try’d, 181 A Whig that’s full, 207 As Cupid roguishly one Day, 217 A Young Man sick and like to die, 267 At Noon in a sultry Summer’s Day, 282 Ah! how lovely sweet and dear, 287 Advance, advance, advance gay, 288 Ah! foolish Lass, what mun I do, 322 B Old impudent Fuller invented, 5 By Moon-light on the Green, 103 Bonny Peggy Ramsey that any, 139 By shady Woods and purling, 161 Belinda! why do you distrust, 213 Born to surprize the World, 250 Bring out your Coney-Skins, 303 Bonny Scottish Lads that keens, 326 C Ome bring us Wine in Plenty, 15 Come pretty Birds present your, 120 Come fill up the Bowl with, 138 Cease lovely Strephon, cease to, 189 Cease whining Damon to complain, 202 Cælia my Heart has often rang’d, 230 Corinna, if my Fate’s to love you, 254 Cælia’s Charms are past expressing, 257 Come Beaus, Virtuoso’s, rich Heirs, 265 D F G H I Cease, cease of Cupid to complain, 298 Come, come ye Nymphs, 300 Chloe blush’d, and frown’d, and swore, 345 Cælia hence with Affectation, 350 D ID you not hear of a gallant, 80 Divine Astrea hither flew, 275 Draw Cupid draw, and make, 306 Damon if you will believe me, 327 Drunk I was last Night that’s, 329 Delia tir’d Strephon with her, 343 F Air Cælia too fondly contemns, 169 Fly Damon fly, ’tis Death to stay, 247 Fear not Mortal, none shall harm, 248 Farewel ungrateful Traytor, 335 G Ilderoy was a bonny Boy, 39 Good Neighbour why do you, 73 H OW now Sister Betteris, why look, 68 Heaven first created Woman to, 135 Hears not my Phillis how, 149 How happy’s the Mortal whose, 179 He himself courts his own Ruin, 188 How happy and free is the, 193 How charming Phillis is, 201 Hither turn thee, hither turn thee, 211 Here lies William de Valence, 220 Ho my dear Joy, now what dost, 240 Here’s a Health to the Tackers, 284 Here are People and Sports of, 308 Hark! now the Drums beat up again, 319 How often have I curs’d that sable Deceit, 352 I Am a young Lass of Lynn, 59 I am a jovial Cobler bold and, 75 It was a Rich Merchant Man, 77 If Sorrow the Tyrant invade, 83 In the pleasant Month of May, 101 It was a happy Golden Day, 110 L M N O I prithee send me back my Heart, 143 In Chloris all soft Charms agree, 162 I lik’d, but never lov’d before, 171 Iris beware when Strephon pursues, 199 I am one in whom Nature has, 241 In vain, in vain, the God I ask, 251 In the Devil’s Country there, 271 In elder Time, there was of Yore, 289 Ianthia the lovely, the Joy of, 301 Jockey met with Jenny fair, 317 I met with the Devil in the, 330 Jilting is in such a Fashion, 333 Jockey loves his Moggy dearly, 341 L ET the Females attend, 8 Let’s be jolly, fill our Glasses, 16 Let’s sing of Stage-Coaches, 20 Last Christmas ’twas my chance, 25 Lately as thorough the fair, 44 Let Soldiers fight for Pay and Praise, 145 Long had Damon been admir’d, 158 Laurinda, who did love Disdain, 167 Let Ambition fire thy Mind, 205 Long was the Day e’er Alexis, 214 Let’s be merry, blith and jolly, 337 M Y Friend if you would understand, 94 Marriage it seems is for better, 272 N O more let Damon’s Eyes pursue, 239 Nay pish, nay pish, nay pish Sir, 305 No, no every Morning my, 323 Now my Freedom’s regain’d, 325 No, Phillis, tho’ you’ve all the Charms, 338 Now to you ye dry Wooers, 340 O Nce more to these Arms my, 92 One Night in my Ramble I, 109 Oh! let no Eyes be dry, 130 Old Lewis le Grand, he raves like, 151 Of old Soldiers, the Song you, 217 Of late in the Park a fair Fancy, 243 P S T Oh! how you protest and solemnly, 316 P Hilander and Sylvia, a gentle, 140 Poor Jenny and I we toiled, 146 Pretty Floramel, no Tongue can, 160 Plague us not with idle Stories, 204 Poor Mountfort is gone, and the, 244 Pretty Parrot say, when I was, 280 S Tate and Ambition, all Joy to, 11 Stay, stay, shut the Gates, 85 Slaves to London I’ll deceive you, 114 Stay, ah stay, ah turn, ah whither, 237 See how fair and fine she lies, 252 Since Cælia only has the Art, 286 Some brag of their Chloris, 307 See, Sirs, see here! a Doctor rare, 311 Swain thy hopeless Passion smother, 344 T Here was an old Woman liv’d, 13 The Suburbs is a fine Place, 27 There can be no Glad man, 32 Then Jockey wou’d a wooing away, 42 There was a Lass of Islington, 46 There was a Lord of worthy Fame, 53 There was a Jovial Tinker, 62 There is a fine Doctor now come, 71 There was a Knight and he, 112 Think wretched Mortal, think, 134 To the Wars I must alass, 137 Though the Pride of my Passion fair, 156 Tell me ye Sicilian Swains, 175 To the Grove, gentle Love, let, 182 Tell me no more of Flames in, 183 Tho’ Fortune and Love may be, 186 That little Patch upon your Face, 197 Tho’ over all Mankind, besides my, 233 There lives an Ale-draper near, 259 The Caffalier was gone, and the, 274 The Devil he pull’d off his Jacket, 278 The Jolly, Jolly Breeze, 347 The Jolly, Jolly Bowl, ib. U U W Y Pon a Holiday, when Nymphs, 87 W Here gott’st thou the Haver-mill, 17 When first Mardyke was made, 65 When Maids live to Thirty, yet never, 99 What Life can compare, with the, 125 With my Strings of small Wire, 128 When that young Damon bless’d, 131 Would you be a Man in Fashion, 154 When first I fair Celinda knew, 157 When busy Fame o’er all the, 164 Why am I the only Creature, 165 Where would coy Amyntas run, 172 When gay Philander left the Plain, 177 Wealth breeds Care, Love, Hope, 185 When first Amyntas charmed my, 192 Why so pale and wan fond Lover, 195 When I languish’d and wish’d you, 209 When first I saw her charming Face, 277 While the Love is thinking, 283 When Jemmy first began to love, 332 Y OU Master Colours pray, 22 Ye brave Boys and Tars, 115 Young Coridon and Phillis, 126 Your Hay it is mow’d, and your, 142 You happy Youths, whose Hearts, 191 Young Ladies that live in the, 262 You I love by all that’s true, 336 You’ve been with dull Prologues, 349 S o n g s Compleat, Pleasant and Divertive, &c. 1 A VOL. V. The Four-Legg’d Elder: Or a Horrible Relation of a Dog and an Elder’s Maid. By Sir John Burtonhead. [Listen] music LL Christians and Lay-Elders too, For Shame amend your Lives; I’ll tell you of a Dog-trick now, Which much concerns you Wives: An Elder’s Maid near Temple-Bar, (Ah! what a Quean was she?) Did take an ugly Mastiff Cur, Where Christians use to be. Help House of Commons, House of Peers, Oh now or never help! Th’ Assembly hath not sat Four Years, Yet hath brought forth a Whelp. One Evening late she stept aside, Pretending to fetch Eggs; And there she made her self a Bride, To one that had four Legs: Her Master heard a Rumblement, And wonder she did tarry; Not dreaming (without his consent) His Dog would ever Marry. Help House of Commons, &c. He went to peep, but was afraid, And hastily did run, To fetch a Staff to help his Maid, Not knowing what was done: He took his Ruling Elders Cane, And cry’d out help, help, here; For Swash our Mastiff, and poor Jane, Are now fight Dog, fight Bear. Help House of Commons, &c. But when he came he was full sorry, For he perceiv’d their Strife; That according to the Directory, They Two were Dog and Wife: Ah! (then said he) thou cruel Quean, Why hast thou me beguil’d? I wonder Swash was grown so lean, Poor Dog he’s almost spoil’d. Help House of Commons, &c. 2 I thought thou hadst no Carnal Sense, But what’s in our Lasses: And could have quench’d thy Cupiscence, According to the Classes: But all the Parish see it plain, Since thou art in this pickle; Thou art an Independent Quean, And lov’st a Conventicle. Help House of Commons, &c. Alas now each Malignant Rogue, Will all the World perswade; That she that’s Spouse unto a Dog, May be an Elder’s Maid: They’ll jeer us if abroad we stir, Good Master Elder stay; Sir, of what Classis is your Cur? And then what can we say? Help House of Commons, &c. They’ll many graceless Ballads sing, Of a Presbyterian; That a Lay Elder is a thing Made up half Dog, half Man: Out, out, said he, (and smote her down) Was Mankind grown so scant? There’s scarce another Dog in Town, Had took the Covenant. Help House of Commons, &c. Then Swash began to look full grim, And Jane did thus reply; Sir, you thought nought too good for him, You fed your Dog too high: ’Tis true he took me in the lurch, And leap’d into my Arms; But (as I hope to come at Church) I did your Dog no harm. Help House of Commons, &c. Then she was brought to Newgate Gaol, And there was Naked stripp’d; They whipp’d her till the Cords did fail, As Dogs us’d to be whipp’d: Poor City Maids shed many a Tear, When she was lash’d and bang’d; And had she been a Cavalier, Surely she had been hang’d. Help House of Commons, &c. Hers was but Fornication found, For which she felt the Lash: But his was Bugg’ry presum’d, Therefore they hanged Swash: What will become of Bishops then, Or Independency? For now we find both Dogs and Men, Stand up for Presbytry. Help House of Commons, &c. She might have took a Sow-gelder, With Synod-men good store, But she would have a Lay-Elder, With Two Legs and Two more: 3 4 B Go tell the Assembly of Divines, Tell Adoniram blue; Tell Burgess, Marshall, Case and Vines, Tell Now-and-Anon too. Help House of Commons, &c. Some say she was a Scottish Girl, Or else (at least) a Witch; But she was born in Colchester, Was ever such a Bitch: Take heed all Christian Virgins now, The Dog-Star now prevails; Ladys beware your Monkeys too, For Monkeys have long Tails. Help House of Commons, &c. Bless King and Queen, and send us Peace, As we had Seven Years since: For we remember no Dog-days, While we enjoy’d our Prince: Bless sweet Prince Charles, Two Dukes, Three Girls, Lord save his Majesty; Grant that his Commons, Lords, and Earls, May lead such lives as He. Help House of Commons, &c. Plain Proof Ruin’d: Or, a Grand C H E AT Discover’d. [Listen] music Old Impudent Fuller invented a Plot, And all to discover the Devil knows what; About a young Bantling strangely begot. Which no body can deny. The better to cheat both the Fools and the Wise, 5 He Impos’d on a Nation a Hundred of Lies; That none but a Knight of the Post could devise. Which no body can deny. He tells us he had the Honour to peep, In the Warming-pan where the Welch Infant did sleep; And found out a Plot which was Damnable deep, Which no Body can believe. Then to the Wise Senate he suddenly went, Where he told all the Lies that he then could invent, For which he was Voted a Rogue by consent, Which no Body can deny. And tho’ he was Punish’d for that his Offence, He has almost forgot it, it was so long since, Therefore the whole Game he began to Commence, Which no Body can deny. Then he to the Lords his bold Letters did send, And told the high Peers, that the Plot he could mend, And make it as plain, as he first did pretend, Which no Body can deny. He told them his Witnesses were mighty Men, That wou’d come to the Town, tho’ the Devil knows when, And make William Fuller once famous agen, Which no Body can deny. The Lords they were Generous, Noble and Kind, And allowed him Freedom his ’Squires to find, The which he will do when the Devil is Blind, Which no Body can deny. So the Peers they declared him a scandalous Sot, And none thinks him fit to manage a Plot, If Newgate and Tyburn does fall to his Lot, There’s no Body will deny. They gave him no more time than himself did require, To find out his Jones and the wandering ’Squire, But the time being come, they were never the nigher, Which no Body can deny. The brave House of Commons next for him did send, To hear what the Block-headly Fool wou’d pretend, Who humbly request, that they wou’d him befriend, Which no Body can deny. One day he declar’d they were near London Town, But the very next Day into Wales they were flown, Such nimble Heel’d Witnessess never were known, Which no Body can deny. When being Examin’d about his sham Plot, He answer’d as though he had minded them not, Perhaps the Young Rogue had his Lesson forgot, Which no Body can deny. But after some Study and impudent Tales, Ask’d for a Commission to march into Wales, And be Chang’d to a Herse, as Rogues goes to Gaols, Which no Body can deny. But seeing his Impudence still to abound, 6 7 L To go search for the Men who were not to be found, They immediately sent him back to Fleet Pound, Which no Body can deny. From the Fleet to the Cart may he quickly advance To learn the true Steps of old Oates’s New Dance, And something beside, or it is a great Chance, Which no Body can deny. He has made it a Trade to be doing of Wrong, In Swearing, and Lying, and Cheating so long, For all his Life time, he’s been at it ding dong, Which no Body can deny. Welch Taffy he raves and crys Splutterdenails, He’s abused hur Highness with Lies and with Tales, Hur will hang hur if e’er hur can catch hur in Wales, Which no Body will deny. The Woman Warrior. Who liv’d in Cow-cross near West-Smithfield; who changing her Apparrel, entered her self on Board in Quality of a Soldier, and sailed to Ireland, where she Valiantly behaved her self, particularly at the Siege of Cork, where she lost her Toes, and received a Mortal Wound in her Body, of which she since Died in her return to London. [Listen] music Et the Females attend, To the Lines which are penn’d, For here I shall give a Relation; Of a Young marry’d Wife, Who did venture her Life, For a Soldier, a Soldier she went from the Nation. She her Husband did leave, 8 9 And did likewise receive Her Arms, and on Board she did enter; And right valiantly went, With a Resolution bent, To the Ocean, the Ocean her Life there to venture. Yet of all the Ships Crew, Not a Seaman that knew, They then had a Woman so near ’em; On the Ocean so deep, She her Council did keep, Ay, and therefore, and therefore she never did fear ’em. She was valiant and bold, And would not be controul’d, By any that dare to offend her; If a Quarrel arose, She would give him dry Blows, And the Captain, the Captain did highly commend her. For he took her to be, Then of no mean Degree, A Gentleman’s Son or a ’Squire; With a Hand white and fair, There was none could compare, Which the Captain, the Captain did often admire. On the Irish Shore, Where the Cannons did roar, With many stout Lads she was landed; There her Life to expose, She lost two of her Toes, And in Battle, in Battle was daily commended. Under Grafton she fought, Like a brave Hero stout, And made the proud Tories retire; She in Field did appear, With a Heart void of Fear, And she bravely, she bravely did charge and give fire. While the battering Balls, Did assault the strong Walls, Of Cork and the sweet Trumpets sounded; She did bravely advance, Where by unhappy Chance, This young Female, young Female alass she was wounded. At the End of the Fray, Still she languishing lay, Then over the Ocean they brought her; To her own Native Shore, Now they ne’er knew before, That a Woman, a Woman had been in that Slaughter. What she long had conceal’d, Now at length she reveal’d, That she was a Woman that ventur’d; Then to London with care, She did straitways repair, But she dy’d, oh she dy’d e’er the City she enter’d. When her Parents beheld, They with Sorrow was fill’d, For why they did dearly adore her: 10 S In her Grave now she lies, ’Tis not watery Eyes, No nor Sighing, nor Sighing that e’er can restore her. A Medly, Compos’d out of several SONGS. [Listen] music Tate and Ambition, all Joy to great Cæsar, Sawney shall ne’er be my Colly my Cow; All Hail to the Shades, all Joy to the Bridegroom, And call upon Dobbin with Hi, Je, ho. Remember ye Whigs, what was formerly done; And Jenny come tye my bonny Cravat, If I live to grow old for I find I go down, For I cannot come every Day to Wooe. Jove in his Throne was a Fumbler, Tom Farthing, And Jockey and Jenny together did lie; Oh Mother Roger: Boys, fill us a Bumper, For why will ye die my poor Cælia, ah why? Hark! how thundring Cannons do roar, Ladies of London both wealthy and fair; 11 12