Walking in Zen, Sitting in Zen ZenStories Talksgivenfrom05/03/80amto10/05/80am EnglishDiscourseseries. Originaltapetitlecallsdiscourses1to6as”Part1”,and7to16as”Part2”. 1 CHAPTER The Breath of the Soul 5March1980aminBuddhaHall Thefirstquestion Question1 OSHO, WHY HAVE YOU CALLED THIS SERIES OF DISCOURSES: ”WALKING IN ZEN, SITTING IN ZEN”? I AM NOT TO BLAME. The whole blame goes to this old guy Yoka. Yoka is one of the rarest enlightened people; his sayings are tremendously beautiful. Very few sayings are available, but eachsayingisadiamonduniqueinitself. Readinghissayings,Icameacrossthisstatement: AMANOFZENWALKSINZENANDSITSINZEN.WHETHERHESPEAKSORACTS,WHETHER HE IS SILENT OR INACTIVE, HIS BODY IS ALWAYS PEACEFUL. HE SMILES, LOOKING STRAIGHT AT THE SWORD WHICH TAKES HIS LIFE. HE KEEPS HIS BALANCE EVEN AT THE MOMENTOFDEATH. I love the statement that the ”man of Zen walks in Zen and sits in Zen” for the simple reason that meditation cannot be just a part of your life. You cannot make a fragment of your life meditative; it is not possible to be meditative for one hour and then non-meditative for twenty-three hours. It is absolutelyimpossible. Ifyouaredoingthat,thatmeansyourmeditationisfalse. 2 CHAPTER1. THEBREATHOFTHESOUL Meditationcaneitherbeatwenty-four-houraffairoritcannotbeatall. Itislikebreathing: youcannot breathe for one hour and then put it aside for twenty-three hours, otherwise you will be dead. You have to go on breathing. Even while you are asleep you have to go on breathing. Even in a deep comayouhavetogoonbreathing. Meditationisthebreathofyoursoul. Justasbreathingisthelifeofthebody,meditationisthelifeof thesoul. Thepeoplewhoarenotawareofmeditationarespirituallydead. GeorgeGurdjieffusedtosaythatveryfewpeoplehavesouls–andheisright. Oneisbornnotwith a soul but only with a seed which can grow into a soul – which may not grow. It will depend on you. Youwillhavetocreatetherightsoil,therightclimateforittogrow,tobloom. Youwillhavetoprovoke the spring into coming to you so that your soul can flower, otherwise you are just a body-mind. The soul is only an empty word. Meditation makes it a reality. Meditation is the climate in which the soul happens. Zen is another name for meditation. The word zen comes from the Sanskrit root dhyan – it has traveled far. Dhyan means a state of absolute silence, of thoughtless silence, but full of awareness. Even the thought that ”I am aware” is enough to distract you from your meditation. Even to know that”Iaminmeditation”isenoughtodestroyit. A state of meditation is an innocent, silent state. You are blissfully unaware of your awareness. You are, but you are utterly relaxed. You are not in a state of sleep; you are fully alert, more alert than ever. Youarealertness,rather. DhyanisthegreatestcontributionoftheEasttotheevolutionofhumanity. Buddha himself never used Sanskrit; he used a language that was used by the masses of those days, he used Pali. In Pali, dhyan becomes jhan. When Buddha’s message reached China, jhan became chan. And when it traveled from China to Japan, it became zen. But it originates from dhyan. Dhyan means meditation, but the English word ”meditation” does not have that flavor, it has a long association with contemplation. The English word ”meditation” means meditation upon something;thereisanobjectofmeditation. AndinZenthereisnoobjectatall,onlypuresubjectivity. Youareaware,butnotawareofsomething. Thereisnothingtobeawareof;everythinghasdisappeared. Youarenotevenawareofnothingness, because then nothingness becomes your object, then nothingness becomes your thought. You are not aware of emptiness either. You are simply aware; there is no object to your awareness. The mirrorisempty,reflectingnothing,becausethereisnothingtoreflect. You have to remember it, otherwise ”meditation” can give you a wrong impression. Whenever the word”meditation”isused,immediatelythequestionarises,”Onwhat?”Thatquestionisirrelevant. If youareasking,”Onwhat?”thenyouareaskingwhattothinkabout,contemplateabout,concentrate on–andthatisnotmeditation. Concentration is not meditation, concentration is an effort of the mind to focus itself. It has certain purposesofitsown. Itisamethodinscience–useful,butitisnotmeditation. WalkinginZen,SittinginZen 3 Osho CHAPTER1. THEBREATHOFTHESOUL Contemplation is a little vague, more abstract. In concentration, the object is more visible; in contemplation, the object is abstract. You concentrate on a flame of light; you contemplate on love. AndinChristianity,contemplationandmeditationhavebecomesynonymous. Meditation should be given a new meaning, a new fragrance – the fragrance of Zen. Concentration isofthemind,meditationisnotofthemindatall,andcontemplationisjustinbetween,inalimbo. It issomethingofthemindandsomethingoftheno-mind,amixture;astatewheremindandno-mind meet,theboundary. Onehastoreachtotheabsolutestateofawareness: thatisZen. Youcannotdoiteverymorningfor a few minutes or for half an hour and then forget all about it. It has to become like your heartbeat. Youhavetositinit,youhavetowalkinit. Yes,youhaveeventosleepinit. Ananda,oneofGautamBuddha’schiefdisciples,askedBuddha,”Onethingalwayspuzzlesmeand Icannotcontainmycuriosityanymorealthoughmyquestionisirrelevant. Thequestionisthatwhen you go to sleep you remain the whole night in the same posture. Wherever you put your hands, your feet, whatsoever side you lie on, you remain exactly the same, like a statue. You don’t move, you don’t change your side, you don’t move your hands,. your feet – nothing changes. You wake up in the morning in exactly the same posture that you had gone to sleep in. One night, just out of curiosity,Ilookedatyouthewholenight–notasinglemovement. Areyoucontrollingyourselfeven inyoursleep?” Buddhasaid,”Thereisnoquestionofcontrol. Iamawake,Iaminmeditation. Isleepinmeditation. Just as I wake up early in the morning in meditation, every night I go to sleep in meditation. My day is my meditation, my night too. I remain absolutely calm and quiet because deep down I am perfectly aware. The flame of meditation goes on burning smokeless. That’s why there is no need tomove.” Yokasays: AMANOFZENWALKSINZENANDSITSINZEN. This is of great significance for you all. Meditation has to become something so deep in you that wherever you go it remains, abides with you; whatsoever you do it is always there. Only then can your life be transformed. Then not only will you be meditative in your life, you will be meditative in yourdeathtoo. Youwilldieindeepmeditation. That’s how Buddha died. That’s how all the Buddhas have always died: their death is something exquisitely beautiful. Their life is beautiful, their death too. There is no gap between their life and death. Theirdeathisacrescendooftheirlife,theultimatepeak,theabsoluteexpression. When Buddha died he was eighty-two years old. He called his disciples together – just as he used to when he talked to them every morning. They all gathered. Nobody was thinking at all about his death. And then Buddha said, ”This is my last sermon to you. Whatsoever I had to say to you I have said. Forty-two years I have been telling you, saying to you... I have poured out my whole heart. Now, if WalkinginZen,SittinginZen 4 Osho CHAPTER1. THEBREATHOFTHESOUL somebodyhasanyquestionlefthecanask,becausethisisthelastdayofmylife. TodayIleavefor theothershore. Myboathasarrived.” Theywereshocked! Theyhadcomejusttolistentothedailydiscourse. Theywerenotthinkingthat he was going to die – and without making any fuss about death! It was just a simple phenomenon, a simple declaration that ”My boat has come and I have to leave. If you have any question left you can ask me, because if you don’t ask me today, I will never again be available. Then the question willremainwithyou. Soplease,bekindanddon’tbeshy,”hetoldhisdisciples. They started crying. And Buddha said, ”Stop all this nonsense! This is no time to waste on crying and weeping! Ask if you have something to ask, otherwise let me go. The time has come. I cannot lingeranylonger.” They said,’We have nothing to ask. You have given more than we would have ever asked. You haveansweredallthequestionsthatwehaveasked,thatwecouldhaveasked. Youhaveanswered questionswhichforcenturieswillbefulfillingforallkindsofinquirers.” ThenBuddhasaid,”SoIcantakeleaveofyou. Good-bye.” Andheclosedhiseyes,satinalotusposture,andstartedmovingtowardstheothershore. It is said: the first step was that he left his body, the second step was that he left his mind, the third step was that he left his heart, the fourth step was that he left his soul. He disappeared into the universal so peacefully, so silently, so joyously. The birds were chirping; it was early morning – the sun was still on the horizon. And ten thousand sannyasins were sitting and watching Buddha dying with such grace! They forgot completely that this was death. There was nothing of death as they hadalwaysconceivedit. Itwassuchanextraordinaryexperience. So much meditative energy was released that many became enlightened that very day, that very moment. Those who were just on the verge were pushed into the unknown. Thousands, it is said, becameenlightenedthroughBuddha’sbeautifuldeath. Wedon’tcallitdeath,wecallitMahaparinirvana,dissolvingintotheabsolute–justlikeanicecube melting,dissolvingintotheocean. Helivedinmeditation,hediedinmeditation. ItisbecauseofYokathatIhavechosenthistitle’WalkinginZen,SittinginZen.”Inthissimplephrase, thewholeexperienceofalltheawakenedonesiscondensed. Yokaalsosays: THEFEARLESSTHOUGHTOFZENISLIKETHEPOWERFULROARINGOFALION,STRIKING TERRORINTOTHEHEARTSOFALLOTHERANIMALS.EVENTHEKINGOFTHEELEPHANTS RUNSOFFFORGETTINGHISDIGNITY.DISCIPLESOFGOODHEART,THEYALONE,LIKETHE OLDDRAGONHEARTHATROARINGWITHCALMDELIGHT. Yes, Zen is like the roar of a lion. All other religions speak in a way that does not hurt so much. They are compromising; they compromise with your sleep. Zen is non-compromising. It does not WalkinginZen,SittinginZen 5 Osho CHAPTER1. THEBREATHOFTHESOUL careaboutyoursleepandyourbeautifuldreams. Itshocksyou,itshattersyou. Itswholeeffortisto wakeyou,whatsoeverthecost. Yes,itislikealion’sroar. ONLY DISCIPLES OF GOOD HEART, THEY ALONE, LIKE THE OLD DRAGON HEAR THAT ROARINGWITHCALMDELIGHT. It can be heard only with a deep love for truth. It can be heard only by those who are real inquirers, not just curious, not just spectators, not just philosophers, but who are really ready to go through a radicaltransformation–whoarereadytodieandbereborn. Itisonlyforthosefewpeoplewhohave guts and courage, because it is not a Sunday religion like Christianity, that each Sunday you go to thechurchandyourparadiseisassured. ItisnotlikeMohammedanism,thatyouprayfivetimes,go on repeating like a parrot the same words, which are not your words, which are not spontaneous to you,whichhavebeenimposedbyothersonyou–youmaynotevenknowtheirmeaning. Itissuchastupidworld! MohammedansprayinArabic,whichtheydon’tunderstand;Hindusprayin Sanskrit,whichtheydon’tunderstand;andnowBuddhistsprayinPali,whichtheydon’tunderstand – for the simple reason that priests have been very much insistent on keeping the dead language becausethoseprayersareverypooriftheyaretranslatedintothelanguagewhichyouunderstand. You will be at a loss – you will not be able to see what there is to pray in them; they will lose all the mystery. Themysteryisbecauseyoudon’tunderstandthem. HenceLatin,Greek,Arabic,Sanskrit, Pali, Prakrit – dead languages which nobody understands anymore. Priests go on insisting that prayersshouldbeinthosedeadlanguages. Youaresayingsomethingthemeaningofwhichisnotknowntoyou. Whatkindofprayeristhis? To whom are you addressing it? You don’t know anything about God. And what you are saying is not arisingoutofyourheart,youarejustbeingagramophonerecord–HisMaster’sVoice. Zen is not interested in such compromises. It wants you to really wake up. And it is hard work, a thankless job. A Zen Master has chosen something for which nobody is going to thank him. Everybody will feel sabotaged by him and everybody will feel hurt by him. Everybody will feel he is disturbingtheirsleep. Onlyveryfewpeople,whoarerealinquirers,whoarereadytoriskall,willbe able to understand, because Zen says your whole life has to be transformed, not just a part of your life. Whenyouareinthetemple,inthemosque,inthesynagogue,youbecomereligious,andwhenyou are outside of it you are irreligious, just the old self. Then your being in the temple is a pretension. Itdividesyou,itcreatesa schizophrenichumanity,it creates people whohavesplitminds. Ifyougo and see them praying in the mosques, in the temples, you will say, ”How beautiful they are!” And the same people in the marketplace become so ugly. And the same people will kill each other with such cruelty you could not have conceived of it! If you had seen them praying in the mosque, in the church,youwouldnothavebelievedthattheywouldbutchereachothersocruelly,somechanically. Christians have killed thousands of Mohammedans, Mohammedans have killed thousands of ChristiansHindushavekilledMohammedans,MohammedanshavekilledHindus,Hindushavekilled Buddhists, and so on and so forth. All these religions have been enemies to each other. They talk oflove,butthatisonlymeretalk;therealityistotallydifferent. Andwhyisitso?becausetheirprayer isfalse. WalkinginZen,SittinginZen 6 Osho CHAPTER1. THEBREATHOFTHESOUL Zen wants you to be religious, not in a formal way, but to be really religious in your day-to-day life. Zen does not divide your life into the mundane and the sacred, it says everything is sacred. So eating, be meditative. Walking, be meditative. Whatsoever you are doing... taking a bath, be meditative. Whereveryouare,youareinthetemple. ThiswholeexistenceisGod’stemple! Behave asyouwouldliketobehaveinatemple. Godispresenteverywhere. Zen does not talk about God at all, but only of godliness: a certain quality, a fragrance which is everywhere. Only when you have the capacity to learn will you be able to see it. All that is needed onyourpartisthecapacitytobesilent,receptive,welcoming,open. Thesecondquestion Question2 OSHO, ITISCLAIMEDTHATWELEARNFROMCHAOS. HOWMUCHMOREDOESMANNEEDTOAWAKEN? SolLewis, Chaosisnotthereoutside–theoutsideisacosmos–butinsidethereisachaos. Anditisbecause ofthechaosinsidethatpeopledon’tlookinwards. Theyareafraidtolook,veryfrightenedoflooking in. They keep themselves occupied in every possible way so that there is no time left, no space left to look in. They go on listening to the Buddhas, who say, ”Know thyself.” They understand what is meant by ”knowing thyself”, but they don’t make any effort to know themselves. They are afraid of thechaos. Inside there is chaos. Outside there is no chaos. The stars are moving in a rhythm, the whole existence is rhythmic, it is in absolute accord. It is just man’s mind which is in a chaos. And if you seeanychaosoutside,thatisman-made,man-created. Manremainsachaosunlesshebecomesano-mind. Mindisachaos–mindisboundtobeachaos – and you have become identified with it. What is mind? Past plus future. The present is not part of the mind at all, the present belongs to existence – and the present is an absolute harmony. The pastisnomoreandthefutureisnotyet,andyourmindconsistsofthesetwonon-existentialthings: memories and imaginations, memories and desires, memories and hopes. It is because of this that youarelivinginamadstate. Everybodyisinsaneinside. Wedon’tcallanybodyinsaneunlesshemovestoomuchtotheextreme; but the difference between insane people and the so-called sane is only of degree – and anything cantriggerit. Youarejustboilingsomewherenearninety-ninedegrees;justonedegreemore–your business fails, you go bankrupt, your wife dies – and that one degree is added to your ninety-nine degrees,andyoustartevaporating;youareinsane. The psychiatrists, the psychotherapists, all function only to keep you within limits. They keep you normally abnormal – that is their function. They are the agents of society, just as in the old days, WalkinginZen,SittinginZen 7 Osho CHAPTER1. THEBREATHOFTHESOUL priestsweretheagentsofthesociety. Psychotherapistsarethenewpriests,anewpriesthoodwhich functionstokeepthissocietyrunning,whichkeepsthissocietybelievingthateverythingisokay. Nothing is okay. Everybody is on the verge of a breakdown and anything, any accident, can push you into the world of the insane. You are getting ready, you are always getting ready. The more sensitiveyouare,themorealiveyouare,thegreaterthepossibilitythatyoumaygoinsane. At the funeral of his wife Perelli made a terrible scene, so terrible and heart-rending, in fact, that friends had to forcibly restrain him from jumping into the grave and being buried with his beloved Maria. Then, still overcome with grief, he was taken home in the rented limousine and immediately wentintocompleteseclusion. A week passed and nothing was heard of him. Finally, worried about the poor guy, his late wife’s brotherwenttothehouse. Afterringingthedoorbellfortenminutes–andstillworried–thebrother- in-law jimmied the front door, went upstairs and found his dead sister’s husband busily banging the maid. Thebedroomwasamess–emptychampagnebottleseverywhere. ”This is terrible, Perelli! ” the brother-in-law declared in shocked tones. ”Your dead wife, my sister, hasbeendeadonlyaweekandyou’redoingthis! You’redoingTHIS!” So busy in the saddle was Perelli that he managed only to turn his head. ”How do I know what I’m doing?”hesaid. ”Igotsuchgrief! Igotsuchgrief!” People are in a mess! They are just keeping face somehow, managing a facade, pretending that everythingisokay. Butnothingisokay. Youaskme,Sol: ITISCLAIMEDTHATWELEARNFROMCHAOS. Yes,itistrue. Butwelearnfromchaosonlyifwegoinwards,ifweenterintothechaosconsciously, deliberately, knowingly. If we encounter the chaos, of course, we learn – there is no other way of learning. It is really out of this chaos that stars are born. It is out of this chaos that Buddhas are born–butyouhavetoencounterit. And we go on doing just the opposite: we go on hiding it, covering it. We don’t want to show it to anybody and we don’t want to see it ourselves. We are so frightened, we are so scared. We are afraidthatwemaynotbeabletomanage. Weareafraidthatifwegoinwemaynotbeabletocome back. So we cling to anything on the outside; any excuse is enough to cling. We go on clinging to somethingorother–wejustgoonavoidingourselves. The person that you are avoiding the most in your life is you. Your whole life is managed in such a way that you never come across yourself. You have been trained, brought up, educated, cultured, civilized in such a way that you will never meet yourself. You will meet everybody except yourself, you will be introduced to everybody except yourself for the simple reason that the society does not knowhowtocopewiththeinnerchaos. WalkinginZen,SittinginZen 8 Osho CHAPTER1. THEBREATHOFTHESOUL It is only in the presence of a Master, in a Buddhafield, that people gather courage to face themselves. And in the beginning it is a breakdown, but if you are moving into it consciously, soon thebreakdownbecomesabreakthrough. TotransformbreakdownsintobreakthroughsisthewholefunctionofaMaster. Thepsychotherapist simply patches you up. He puts a few bandages on you, a little ointment here and a little ointment there. He helps you to stand on your own two feet again, back in the old way. He makes you your oldselfagain. Youstartfunctioning,youstartdoingtheoldthingsthatyouhavealwaysbeendoing. Thatishisfunction. Heisnottheretotransformyou. Youneedametapsychology,thepsychologyoftheBuddhas. It is the greatest adventure in life to go through a breakdown consciously. It is the greatest risk becausethereisnoguaranteethatthebreakdownwillbecomeabreakthrough. Itdoesbecome,but thesethingscannotbeguaranteed. Yourchaosisveryancient–formanymanylivesyouhavebeen in chaos. It is thick and dense. It is almost a universe in itself. So when you enter into it with your small capacity, of course, there is danger. But without facing this danger nobody has ever become integrated,nobodyhaseverbecomeanindividual,indivisible. Sol, the claim is absolutely right: we learn only from chaos. But we learn only if we go through the chaos, and we have to go through the chaos in a particular way, with a style, with a method. Just goingintochaoswithoutanymethodwillbeabreakdown–youwillgomad. Zen, or meditation, is the method which will help you to go through the chaos, through the dark night of the soul, balanced, disciplined, alert. The dawn is not far away, but before you can reach the dawn, the dark night has to be passed through. And as the dawn comes closer, the night will becomedarker. This is really the function of religious communes, because alone you may not be able to do it, but in a commune where many people are ahead of you, many people are behind you, with a Master who has attained to the dawn, who goes on calling you forth, who goes on saying to you, ”Don’t be worried, the goal is not far away.”... And there are people ahead of you who say, ”Don’t be worried. We have passed through such a state and you will also pass through it. Just a little more perseverance,alittlemoreawaiting,alittlemorepatience!” And there is the Master like a shining star. And he goes on helping you in every way, holding your handinmomentswhenyouwouldliketorunaway,toescape,togobacktoyouroldworld,toforget allaboutitbecauseitissuchanightmare. Yes,Sol,onelearns,butonelearnsthehardway;thereisnoshortcut. Yousay: HOWMUCHMOREDOESMANNEEDTOAWAKEN? It is not a question of how much more, it is not a question of quantity; either you are asleep or you areawake. Nooneismoreasleepthananybodyelse. Thepeoplewhoareasleepareasleepinthe same way. It does not matter how deeply you are asleep – it is not a question of quantity – you are asleep, that is enough. And the same is the case with awakening: if you are awake, you are simply awake. Nobodyismoreawakeorlessawake. WalkinginZen,SittinginZen 9 Osho CHAPTER1. THEBREATHOFTHESOUL Forcenturiestheologianshavebeendiscussing... theologiansalwaysdiscussstupidthings. InIndia they have been discussing for centuries ”Who is more awake, Mahavira or Buddha?” Jainas say Mahavira is more awake, Buddha’s followers say Buddha is more awake. And the whole point is nonsensical, the whole argument is foolish. There is no question of more or less: if somebody is awake, he is awake. Buddha is awake, Mahavira is awake. The night is over; the chaos has been transformedintoacosmos. Andthisisthemiracle: whenyouareperfectlyawakeyourverychaosbecomesacosmos,because it starts settling into an orchestra; the noise becomes music. Suddenly, all that was insanity, madness, is transformed into Buddhahood, into enlightenment – the same energy! Chaos means energy – energy of which you are unconscious. If you become conscious, the very phenomenon of consciousnessisatransformingphenomenon. Youneednotdoanythingelse;justbeingconscious isenough. Thespringhascome. Suddenly,budsstartopening,flowersbloom–thousandsofflowers;theinner worldbecomesfulloffragrance. Manisabsolutelyasleep. The drunk Mulla Nasruddin noticed one parrot perched atop a farmhouse gable. Attracted by the bright plumage, he ran to fetch a ladder, climbed onto the roof, and was about to clap his cap over the bird when the parrot fixed him with a beady eye and asked, ”What the hell do you think you’re doing?” ”Gosh,Ididn’tmeannothing!”saidtheMulla,”Ithoughtyouwasabird!” People are not in their senses! You think you are awake, and that is one of the greatest mistakes – itkeepsyouunawake. Theveryideathatyouareawakeisadeception. Ifyouthinkyouarealready awake,thenthereisnoneedtodoanythingtobeawakened. You have to realize that you are drunk, drunk with many things: with greed, with lust, with anger, with ambition, with ego. These are all drugs! It is a very strange world: ordinary drugs, which are not so harmful, are prohibited. People are continuously talking against smoking, which is not very harmful. It is a kind of pranayama: breathing in, breathing out – of course, a little foolish because youcanbreathepureairandyouarebreathingdirtysmoke,andpayingforit,butitisnothingmuch to be worried about. Or people are against alcohol. One in a while a little bit of alcohol is not bad, it is fun! And it is purely vegetarian! You are not harming anybody. But there is so much antagonism againstalcoholandsmoking. And the new drugs are far better than alcohol. For example, LSD is far better, less harmful than alcohol. Taken in right doses, with a right guide, in a right atmosphere, it can reveal many things to you. Itcanbecomeamethodofencounteringyourself. Itcangiveyounewvisions,newinsightsinto your being and into existence itself. But people are against it, although they are not against greed, theyarenotagainstegotrips,theyarenotagainstambition. Just a few months ago Morarji Desai was the Prime Minister of India. He is very much against alcohol, obsessed, he wanted absolute prohibition. But he is not aware that he is more alcoholic WalkinginZen,SittinginZen 10 Osho