The Project Gutenberg EBook of Dryden's Works (8 of 18): Amphitryon; King Arthur; Cleomenes; Love Triumphant, by John Dryden This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere in the United States and most other parts of the world at no cost and with almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org. If you are not located in the United States, you'll have to check the laws of the country where you are located before using this ebook. Title: Dryden's Works (8 of 18): Amphitryon; King Arthur; Cleomenes; Love Triumphant Author: John Dryden Editor: Walter Scott Release Date: December 16, 2014 [EBook #47679] Language: English Character set encoding: ISO-8859-1 *** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK DRYDEN'S WORKS (8 OF 18): *** Produced by Jane Robins, Jonathan Ingram and the Online Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net THE WORKS OF JOHN DRYDEN, NOW FIRST COLLECTED IN EIGHTEEN VOLUMES. ILLUSTRATED WITH NOTES, HISTORICAL, CRITICAL, AND EXPLANATORY, AND A LIFE OF THE AUTHOR, BY WALTER SCOTT, ESQ. VOL. VIII. LONDON: PRINTED FOR WILLIAM MILLER, ALBEMARLE STREET, BY JAMES BALLANTYNE AND CO. EDINBURGH. 1808. CONTENTS OF VOLUME EIGHTH. PAGE. Amphitryon, or the Two Sosias, a Comedy, 1 Epistle Dedicatory to Sir William Leveson Gower, Bart. 7 King Arthur, or the British Worthy, a Dramatic Opera, 107 Epistle Dedicatory to the Marquis of Halifax, 113 Cleomenes, the Spartan Hero, a Tragedy, 181 Epistle Dedicatory to the Earl of Rochester, 191 Preface, 196 The Life of Cleomenes, translated from Plutarch by Mr Thomas Creech, 207 Love Triumphant, or Nature will prevail, a Tragi-comedy, 331 Epistle Dedicatory to the Earl of Salisbury, 337 Prologue, Song, Secular Masque, and Epilogue, written for the Pilgrim, revived for Dryden's benefit in 1700, 437 AMPHITRYON: OR THE TWO SOSIAS. A COMEDY. Egregiam verò laudem, et spolia ampla refertis, Una dolo Divûm si fæmina victa duorum est. Virg. AMPHITRYON. Plautus, the venerable father of Roman comedy, who flourished during the second Punic war, left us a play on the subject of Amphitryon, which has had the honour to be deemed worthy of imitation by Moliere and Dryden. It cannot be expected, that the plain, blunt, and inartificial stile of so rude an age should bear any comparison with that of authors who enjoyed the highest advantages of the polished times, to which they were an ornament. But the merit of having devised and embodied most of the comic distresses, which have excited laughter throughout so many ages, is to be attributed to the ancient bard, upon whose original conception of the plot his successors have made few and inconsiderable improvements. It is true, that, instead of a formal Prologus, who stepped forth, in the character of Mercury, and gravely detailed to the audience the plot of the play, Moliere and Dryden have introduced it in the modern more artificial method, by the dialogue of the actors in the first scene. It is true, also, that with great contempt of one of the unities, afterwards deemed so indispensible by the ancients, Plautus introduces the birth of Hercules into a play, founded upon the intrigue which occasioned that event. Yet with all these disadvantages, and that of the rude flatness of his dialogue,—resting frequently, for wit, upon the most miserable puns,—the comic device of the two Sosias; the errors into which the malice of Mercury plunges his unlucky original; the quarrel of Alcmena with her real husband, and her reconciliation with Jupiter in his stead; the final confronting of the two Amphitryos; and the astonishment of the unfortunate general, at finding every proof of his identity exhibited by his rival,—are all, however rudely sketched, the inventions of the Roman poet. In one respect it would seem, that the jeu de theatre, necessary to render the piece probable upon the stage, was better managed in the time of Plautus than in that of Dryden and Moliere. Upon a modern stage it is evidently difficult to introduce two pair of characters, so extremely alike as to make it at all probable, or even possible, that the mistakes, depending upon their extreme resemblance, could take place. But, favoured by the masks and costume of the ancient theatre, Plautus contrived to render Jupiter and Mercury so exactly like Amphitryon and Sosia, that they were obliged to retain certain marks, supposed to be invisible to the other persons of the drama, by which the audience themselves might be enabled to distinguish the gods from the mortals, whose forms they had assumed[1]. The modern poets have treated the subject, which they had from Plautus, each according to the fashion of his country; and so far did the correctness of the French stage exceed ours at that period, that the palm of the comic writing must be, at once, awarded to Moliere. For, though Dryden had the advantage of the French author's labours, from which, and from Plautus, he has translated liberally, the wretched taste of the age has induced him to lard the piece with gratuitous indelicacy. He is, in general, coarse and vulgar, where Moliere is witty; and where the Frenchman ventures upon a double meaning, the Englishman always contrives to make it a single one. Yet although inferior to Moliere, and accommodated to the gross taste of the seventeenth century, "Amphitryon" is one of the happiest effusions of Dryden's comic muse. He has enriched the plot by the intrigue of Mercury and Phædra; and the petulant interested "Queen of Gipsies," as her lover terms her, is no bad paramour for the God of Thieves. In the scenes of a higher cast, Dryden far outstrips both the French and Roman poet. The sensation to be expressed is not that of sentimental affection, which the good father of Olympus was not capable of feeling; but love, of that grosser and subordinate kind which prompted Jupiter in his intrigues, has been by none of the ancient poets expressed in more beautiful verse than that in which Dryden has clothed it, in the scenes between Jupiter and Alcmena. Even Milbourne, who afterwards attacked our author with such malignant asperity, was so sensible of the merit of "Amphitryon," that he addressed to the publisher the following letter and copy of verses, which Mr Malone's industry recovered from among Mr Tonson's papers. "Mr Tonson, Yarmouth, Novemb. 24.—90. "You'l wonder perhaps at this from a stranger; but ye reason of it may perhaps abate somewhat of ye miracle, and it's this. On Thursday the twentyth instant, I receiv'd Mr Drydens Amphytrio: I leave out the Greeke termination, as not so proper in my opinion, in English. But to passe that; I liked the play, and read it over with as much of criticisme and ill nature as ye time (being about one in ye morning, and in bed,) would permit. Going to sleep very well pleasd, I could not leave my bed in ye morning without this sacrifice to the authours genius: it was too sudden to be correct, but it was very honestly meant, and is submitted to yours and Mr Ds. disposall. [4] [5] "Hail, Prince of Witts! thy fumbling Age is past, Thy youth and witt and art's renewed at last. So on some rock the Joviall bird assays Her ore-grown beake, that marke of age, to rayse; That done, through yield'ing air she cutts her way, And strongly stoops againe, and breaks the trembling prey. What though prodigious thunder stripp'd thy brows Of envy'd bays, and the dull world allows Shadwell should wear them,—wee'll applaud the change; Where nations feel it, who can think it strange! So have I seen the long-ear'd brute aspire To drest commode with every smallest wire; With nightrail hung on shoulders, gravely stalke, Like bawd attendant on Aurelias walke. Hang't! give the fop ingratefull world its will; He wears the laurel,—thou deservs't it still. Still smooth, as when, adorn'd with youthful pride, For thy dear sake the blushing virgins dyed; When the kind gods of witt and love combined, And with large gifts thy yielding soul refined. "Not Phœbus could with gentler words pursue His flying Daphne, not the morning dew Falls softer than the words of amorous Jove, When melting, dying, for Alcmene's love. "Yet briske and airy too, thou fill'st the stage, Unbroke by fortune, undecayed by age. French wordy witt by thine was long surpast; Now Rome's thy captive, and by thee wee taste Of their rich dayntyes; but so finely drest, Theirs was a country meal, thine a triumphant feast. "If this to thy necessityes wee ow, O, may they greater still and greater grow! Nor blame the wish; Plautus could write in chaines, Wee'll blesse thy wants, while wee enjoy thy pains. Wealth makes the poet lazy, nor can fame, That gay attendant of a spritely flame, A Dorset or a Wycherly invite, Because they feel no pinching wants, to write. "Go on! endenizon the Romane slave; Let an eternal spring adorne his grave; His ghost would gladly all his fame submitt To thy strong judgment and thy piercing witt. Purged by thy hand, he speaks immortall sense, And pleases all with modish excellence. Nor would we have thee live on empty praise The while, for, though we cann't restore the bays, While thou writ'st thus,—to pay thy merites due, Wee'll give the claret and the pension too." Milbourne concludes, by desiring to be supplied with such of our author's writings, as he had not already, to be sent to Yarmouth in Norfolk, where he probably had then a living. "Amphitryon" was produced in the same year with "Don Sebastian;" and although it cannot be called altogether an original performance, yet it contains so much original writing as to shew, that our author's vein of poetry was, in his advanced age, distinguished by the same rapid fluency, as when he first began to write for the stage. This comedy was acted and printed in 1690. It was very favourably received; and continued long to be what is called a stock-play. TO THE HONOURABLE SIR WILLIAM LEVESON GOWER, [6] [7] T BARONET.[2] here is one kind of virtue which is inborn in the nobility, and indeed in most of the ancient families of this nation; they are not apt to insult on the misfortunes of their countrymen. But you, sir, I may tell it without flattery, have grafted on this natural commiseration, and raised it to a nobler virtue. As you have been pleased to honour me, for a long time, with some part of your esteem, and your good will; so, in particular, since the late Revolution, you have increased the proofs of your kindness to me; and not suffered the difference of opinions, which produce such hatred and enmity in the brutal part of human kind, to remove you from the settled basis of your good nature, and good sense. This nobleness of yours, had it been exercised on an enemy, had certainly been a point of honour, and as such I might have justly recommended it to the world; but that of constancy to your former choice, and the pursuance of your first favours, are virtues not over-common amongst Englishmen. All things of honour have, at best, somewhat of ostentation in them, and self-love; there is a pride of doing more than is expected from us, and more than others would have done. But to proceed in the same track of goodness, favour, and protection, is to shew that a man is acted by a thorough principle: it carries somewhat of tenderness in it, which is humanity in a heroical degree; it is a kind of unmoveable good-nature; a word which is commonly despised, because it is so seldom practised. But, after all, it is the most generous virtue, opposed to the most degenerate vice, which is that of ruggedness and harshness to our fellow-creatures. It is upon this knowledge of you, sir, that I have chosen you, with your permission, to be the patron of this poem. And as, since this wonderful Revolution, I have begun with the best pattern of humanity, the Earl of Leicester, I shall continue to follow the same method, in all to whom I shall address; and endeavour to pitch on such only, as have been pleased to own me, in this ruin of my small fortune; who, though they are of a contrary opinion themselves, yet blame not me for adhering to a lost cause; and judging for myself, what I cannot chuse but judge, so long as I am a patient sufferer, and no disturber of the government. Which, if it be a severe penance, as a great wit has told the world, it is at least enjoined me by myself: and Sancho Pança, as much fool as I, was observed to discipline his body no farther than he found he could endure the smart. You see, sir, I am not entertaining you like Ovid, with a lamentable epistle from Pontus: I suffer no more than I can easily undergo; and so long as I enjoy my liberty, which is the birth-right of an Englishman, the rest shall never go near my heart. The merry philosopher is more to my humour than the melancholic; and I find no disposition in myself to cry, while the mad world is daily supplying me with such occasions of laughter. The more reasonable sort of my countrymen have shewn so much favour to this piece, that they give me no doubt of their protection for the future. As you, sir, have been pleased to follow the example of their goodness, in favouring me; so give me leave to say that I follow yours, in this dedication to a person of a different persuasion. Though I must confess withal, that I have had a former encouragement from you for this address; and the warm remembrance of your noble hospitality to me, at Trentham[3], when some years ago I visited my friends and relations in your country, has ever since given me a violent temptation to this boldness. It is true, were this comedy wholly mine, I should call it a trifle, and perhaps not think it worth your patronage; but, when the names of Plautus and Moliere are joined in it, that is, the two greatest names of ancient and modern comedy, I must not presume so far on their reputation, to think their best and most unquestioned productions can be termed little. I will not give you the trouble of acquainting you what I have added, or altered, in either of them, so much, it may be, for the worse; but only, that the difference of our stage, from the Roman and the French, did so require it. But I am afraid, for my own interest, the world will too easily discover, that more than half of it is mine; and that the rest is rather a lame imitation of their excellencies, than a just translation. It is enough, that the reader know by you, that I neither deserve nor desire any applause from it: if I have performed any thing, it is the genius of my authors that inspired me; and, if it pleased in representation let the actors share the praise amongst themselves. As for Plautus and Moliere, they are dangerous people; and I am too weak a gamester to put myself into their form of play. But what has been wanting on my part, has been abundantly supplied by the excellent composition of Mr Purcell; in whose person we have at length found an Englishman, equal with the best abroad. At least, my opinion of him has been such, since his happy and judicious performances in the late opera[4], and the experience I have had of him, in the setting my three songs for this "Amphitryon:" to all which, and particularly to the composition of the pastoral dialogue, the numerous choir of fair ladies gave so just an applause on the third day. I am only sorry, for my own sake, that there was one star wanting, as beautiful as any in our hemisphere; that young Berenice[5], who is misemploying all her charms on stupid country souls, that can never know the value of them; and losing the triumphs, which are ready prepared for her, in the court and town. And yet I know not whether I am so much a loser by her absence; for I have reason to apprehend the sharpness of her judgment, if it were not allayed with the sweetness of her nature; and, after all, I fear she may come time enough to discover a thousand imperfections in my play, which might have passed on vulgar understandings. Be pleased to use the authority of a father over her, on my behalf: enjoin her to keep her own thoughts of "Amphitryon" to herself; or at least not to compare him too strictly with Moliere's. It is true, I have an interest in this partiality of hers: but withal, I plead some sort of merit for it, in being so particularly, as I am, SIR, Your most obedient, [8] [9] [10] [11] Humble servant, JOHN DRYDEN. October 24th, 1690. PROLOGUE, SPOKEN BY MRS BRACEGIRDLE. } } } The labouring bee, when his sharp sting is gone, Forgets his golden work, and turns a drone: Such is a satire, when you take away That rage, in which his noble vigour lay. What gain you, by not suffering him to teaze ye? He neither can offend you now, nor please ye. The honey-bag, and venom, lay so near, That both together you resolved to tear; And lost your pleasure, to secure your fear. How can he show his manhood, if you bind him To box, like boys, with one hand tied behind him? This is plain levelling of wit; in which The poor has all the advantage, not the rich. The blockhead stands excused, for wanting sense; And wits turn blockheads in their own defence. Yet, though the stage's traffic is undone, Still Julian's[6] interloping trade goes on: Though satire on the theatre you smother, Yet, in lampoons, you libel one another. The first produces, still, a second jig; You whip them out, like school-boys, till they gig; And with the same success, our readers guess, For every one still dwindles to a less[7]; And much good malice is so meanly drest, That we would laugh, but cannot find the jest. If no advice your rhyming rage can stay, Let not the ladies suffer in the fray: Their tender sex is privileged from war; 'Tis not like knights, to draw upon the fair. What fame expect you from so mean a prize? We wear no murdering weapons, but our eyes. Our sex, you know, was after yours designed; The last perfection of the Maker's mind: Heaven drew out all the gold for us, and left your dross behind. Beauty, for valour's best reward, he chose; Peace, after war; and, after toil, repose. Hence, ye profane, excluded from our sights; And, charmed by day with honour's vain delights, Go, make your best of solitary nights. Recant betimes, 'tis prudence to submit; Our sex is still your over-match in wit: We never fail, with new, successful arts, To make fine fools of you, and all your parts. DRAMATIS PERSONÆ. [12] [13] [14] Jupiter. Mercury. Phœbus. Amphitryon, the Theban General. Sosia, his Slave. Gripus, a Theban Judge. Polidas, } Officers of the Theban Army. Tranio, } Alcmena, Wife to Amphitryon. Phædra, } Her Slaves. Bromia, } Night. SCENE,—Thebes. AMPHITRYON, OR THE TWO SOSIAS. ACT I. SCENE I. Mercury and Phœbus descend in two Machines. Phœ. Know you the reason of this present summons? 'Tis neither council day, nor is this heaven. What business has our Jupiter on earth? Why more at Thebes than any other place? And why we two, of all the herd of gods, Are chosen out to meet him in consult? They call me God of Wisdom; But Mars and Vulcan, the two fools of heaven, Whose wit lies in their anvil and their sword, Know full as much as I. Merc. And Venus may know more than both of us; For 'tis some petticoat affair, I guess. [15] [16] I have discharged my duty, which was, to summon you, Phœbus: we shall know more anon, when the Thunderer comes down. 'Tis our part to obey our father; for, to confess the truth, we two are little better than sons of harlots; and, if Jupiter had not been pleased to take a little pains with our mothers, instead of being gods, we might have been a couple of link- boys. Phœ. But know you nothing farther, Hermes? What news in court? Merc. There has been a devilish quarrel, I can tell you, between Jupiter and Juno. She threatened to sue him in the spiritual court for some matrimonial omissions; and he stood upon his prerogative: then she hit him in the teeth of all his bastards; and your name and mine were used with less reverence than became our godships. They were both in their cups; and at last the matter grew so high, that they were ready to have thrown stars at one another's heads. Phœ. 'Twas happy for me that I was at my vocation, driving day-light about the world. But I had rather stand my father's thunderbolts, than my stepmother's railing. Merc. When the tongue-battle was over, and the championess had harnessed her peacocks to go for Samos, and hear the prayers that were made to her— Phœ. By the way, her worshippers had a bad time on't; she was in a damnable humour for receiving petitions. Merc. Jupiter immediately beckons me aside, and charges me, that, as soon as ever you had set up your horses, you and I should meet him here at Thebes: Now, putting the premises together, as dark as it is, methinks I begin to see day-light. Phœ. As plain as one of my own beams; she has made him uneasy at home, and he is going to seek his diversion abroad. I see heaven itself is no privileged place for happiness, if a man must carry his wife along with him. Merc. 'Tis neither better nor worse, upon my conscience. He is weary of hunting in the spacious forest of a wife, and is following his game incognito in some little purlieu here at Thebes: that's many an honest man's case on earth too, Jove help them! as indeed he does, to make them cuckolds. Phœ. But, if so, Mercury, then I, who am a poet, must indite his love-letter; and you, who are by trade a porter, must convey it. Merc. No more; he's coming down souse upon us, and hears as far as he can see too. He's plaguy hot upon the business, I know it by his hard driving. Jupiter descends. Jup. What, you are descanting upon my actions! Much good may do you with your politics: All subjects will be censuring their kings. Well, I confess I am in love; what then? Phœ. Some mortal, we presume, of Cadmus' blood; Some Theban beauty; some new Semele; Or some Europa. Merc. I'll say that for my father, he's constant to a handsome family; he knows when they have a good smack with them, and snuff's up incense so savourily when 'tis offered by a fair hand,—— Jup. Well, my familiar sons, this saucy carriage I have deserved; for he, who trusts a secret, Makes his own man his master. I read your thoughts; Therefore you may as safely speak as think. Merc. Mine was a very homely thought.—I was considering into what form your almightyship would be pleased to transform yourself to-night: whether you would fornicate in the shape of a bull, or a ram, or an eagle, or a swan; what bird or beast you would please to honour, by transgressing your own laws in his likeness; or, in short, whether you would recreate yourself in feathers, or in leather? Phœ. Any disguise to hide the king of gods. [17] [18] Jup. I know your malice, Phœbus; you would say, That, when a monarch sins, it should be secret, To keep exterior shew of sanctity, Maintain respect, and cover bad example: For kings and priests are in a manner bound, For reverence sake, to be close hypocrites. Phœ. But what necessitates you to this love, Which you confess a crime, and yet commit? For, to be secret makes not sin the less; 'Tis only hidden from the vulgar view; Maintains, indeed, the reverence due to princes, But not absolves the conscience from the crime. Jup. I love, because 'twas in the fates I should. Phœ. With reverence be it spoke, a bad excuse: Thus every wicked act, in heaven or earth, May make the same defence. But what is fate? Is it a blind contingence of events, Or sure necessity of causes linked, That must produce effects? Or is't a power, That orders all things by superior will, Foresees his work, and works in that foresight? Jup. Fate is, what I, By virtue of omnipotence, have made it; And power omnipotent can do no wrong: Not to myself, because I will it so; Nor yet to men, for what they are is mine.— This night I will enjoy Amphitryon's wife; For, when I made her, I decreed her such As I should please to love. I wrong not him Whose wife she is; for I reserved my right, To have her while she pleased me; that once past, She shall be his again. Merc. Here's omnipotence with a vengeance! to make a man a cuckold, and yet not to do him wrong! Then I find, father Jupiter, that when you made fate, you had the wit to contrive a holiday for yourself now and then; for you kings never enact a law, but you have a kind of an eye to your own prerogative. Phœ. If there be no such thing as right and wrong Of an eternal being, I have done; But if there be,—— Jup. Peace, thou disputing fool!— Learn this; If thou could'st comprehend my ways, Then thou wert Jove, not I; yet thus far know, That, for the good of human kind, this night I shall beget a future Hercules, Who shall redress the wrongs of injured mortals, Shall conquer monsters, and reform the world. Merc. Ay, brother Phœbus; and our father made all those monsters for Hercules to conquer, and contrived all those vices on purpose for him to reform too, there's the jest on't. Phœ. Since arbitrary power will hear no reason, 'Tis wisdom to be silent. [19] Merc. Why that's the point; this same arbitrary power is a knock-down argument; 'tis but a word and a blow. Now methinks, our father speaks out like an honest bare-faced god, as he is; he lays the stress in the right place, upon absolute dominion: I confess, if he had been a man, he might have been a tyrant, if his subjects durst have called him to account. But you, brother Phœbus, are but a mere country gentleman, that never comes to court; that are abroad all day on horseback, making visits about the world; are drinking all night; and, in your cups are still railing at the government. O, these patriots, these bumpkin patriots, are a very silly sort of animal! Jup. My present purpose and design you heard, To enjoy Amphitryon's wife, the fair Alcmena: You two must be subservient to my love. Merc. [To Phœbus.] No more of your grumbletonian morals, brother; there's preferment coming; be advised, and pimp dutifully. Jup. Amphitryon, the brave Theban general, Has overcome his country's foes in fight, And, in a single duel, slain their king: His conquering troops are eager on their march Returning home; while their young general, More eager to review his beauteous wife, Posts on before, winged with impetuous love, And, by to-morrow's dawn, will reach this town. Merc. That's but short warning, father Jupiter; having made no former advances of courtship to her, you have need of your omnipotence, and all your godship, if you mean to be beforehand with him. Phœ. Then how are we to be employed this evening? Time's precious, and these summer nights are short; I must be early up to light the world. Jup. You shall not rise; there shall be no to-morrow. Merc. Then the world's to be at an end, I find. Phœ. Or else a gap in nature of a day. Jup. A day will be well lost to busy man; Night shall continue sleep, and care shall cease. So, many men shall live, and live in peace, Whom sunshine had betrayed to envious sight, And sight to sudden rage, and rage to death. Now, I will have a night for love and me; A long luxurious night, fit for a god To quench and empty his immortal heat. Merc. I'll lay on the woman's side for all that, that she shall love longest to-night, in spite of your omnipotence. [20] [21] Phœ. I shall be cursed by all the labouring trades, That early rise; but you must be obeyed. Jup. No matter for the cheating part of man, They have a day's sin less to answer for. Phœ. When would you have me wake? Jup. Why, when Jove goes to sleep; when I have finished, Your brother Mercury shall bring you word.— [Exit Phœbus in his chariot. Now, Hermes, I must take Amphitryon's form, To enjoy his wife: Thou must be Sosia, this Amphitryon's slave; Who, all this night, is travelling to Thebes, To tell Alcmena of her lord's approach, And bring her joyful news of victory. Merc. But why must I be Sosia? Jup. Dull god of wit, thou statue of thyself! Thou must be Sosia, to keep out Sosia; Who, by his entrance, might discover Jove, Disturb my pleasures, raise unruly noise, And so distract Alcmena's tender soul, She would not meet my warmth, when I dissolve Into her lap, nor give down half her love. Merc. Let me alone, I'll cudgel him away; But I abhor so villainous a shape. Jup. Take it, I charge thee on thy duty, take it; Nor dare to lay it down, till I command. I cannot bear a moment's loss of joy.— Night appears above in a chariot. Look up, the Night is in her silent chariot, And rolling just o'er Thebes: Bid her drive slowly, Or make a double turn about the world; While I drop Jove, and take Amphitryon's dress, To be the greater, while I seem the less. [Exit Jupiter. [22] Merc. [To Night.] Madam Night, a good even to you! Fair and softly, I beseech you, madam; I have a word or two to you from no less a god than Jupiter. Night. O my nimble-fingered god of theft, what makes you here on earth at this unseasonable hour? What banker's shop is to be broke open to-night? or what clippers, and coiners, and conspirators, have been invoking your deity for their assistance? Merc. Faith, none of those enormities, and yet I am still in my vocation; for you know I am a jack of all trades. At a word, Jupiter is indulging his genius to-night with a certain noble sort of recreation; called wenching; the truth on't is, adultery is its proper name. Night. Jupiter would do well to stick to his wife, Juno. Merc. He has been married to her above these hundred years; and that's long enough, in conscience, to stick to one woman. Night. She's his sister too, as well as his wife; that's a double tie of affection to her. Merc. Nay, if he made bold with his own flesh and blood, 'tis likely he will not spare his neighbours. Night. If I were his wife, I would raise a rebellion against him, for the violation of my bed. Merc. Thou art mistaken, old Night; his wife could raise no faction. All the deities in heaven would take the part of the cuckold-making god, for they are all given to the flesh most damnably. Nay, the very goddesses would stickle in the cause of love; 'tis the way to be popular, to whore and love. For what dost thou think old Saturn was deposed, but that he was cold and impotent, and made no court to the fair ladies? Pallas and Juno themselves, as chaste as they are, cried, Shame on him!—I say unto thee, old Night, woe be to the monarch that has not the women on his side! Night. Then, by your rule, Mercury, a king who would live happily, must debauch his whole nation of women. Merc. As far as his ready money will go, I mean; for Jupiter himself can't please all of them. —But this is beside my present commission: He has sent me to will and require you to make a swinging long night for him, for he hates to be stinted in his pleasures. Night. Tell him plainly, I'll rather lay down my commission. What, would he make a bawd of me? Merc. Poor ignorant! why he meant thee for a bawd, when he first made thee. What art thou good for, but to be a bawd? Is not day-light better for mankind, I mean as to any other use, but only for love and fornication? Thou hast been a bawd too, a reverend, primitive, original bawd, from the first hour of thy creation; and all the laudable actions of love have been committed under thy mantle. Pr'ythee, for what dost thou think that thou art worshipped? Night. Why, for my stars and moonshine. Merc. That is, for holding a candle to iniquity. But if they were put out, thou would'st be doubly worshipped by the willing bashful virgins. Night. Then, for my quiet, and the sweetness of my sleep. Merc. No:—For thy sweet waking all the night; for sleep comes not upon lovers, till thou art vanished. Night. But it will be against nature, to make a long winter's night at midsummer. Merc. Trouble not yourself for that: Phœbus is ordered to make a short summer's day to- morrow; so, in four-and-twenty hours, all will be at rights again. Night. Well, I am edified by your discourse; and my comfort is, that, whatever work is made, I see nothing. Merc. About your business then. Put a spoke into your chariot-wheels, and order the seven stars to halt, while I put myself into the habit of a serving-man, and dress up a false Sosia, to wait upon a false Amphitryon.—Good night, Night. Night. My service to Jupiter.—Farewell, Mercury. [Night goes backward. Exit Mercury. SCENE II.—Amphitryon's Palace. Enter Alcmena. [23] [24] Alc. Why was I married to the man I love! For, had he been indifferent to my choice, Or had been hated, absence had been pleasure; But now I fear for my Amphitryon's life: At home, in private, and secure from war, I am amidst an host of armed foes, Sustaining all his cares, pierced with his wounds; And, if he falls,—which, O ye gods avert!— Am in Amphitryon slain! Would I were there, And he were here; so might we change our fates; That he might grieve for me, and I might die for him. Enter Phædra, running. Phæd. Good news, good news, madam; O such admirable news, that, if I kept it in a moment, I should burst with it. Alc. Is it from the army? Phæd. No matter. Alc. From Amphitryon? Phæd. No matter, neither. Alc. Answer me, I charge thee, if thy good news be any thing relating to my lord; if it be, assure thyself of a reward. Phæd. Ay, madam, now you say something to the matter: You know the business of a poor waiting-woman, here upon earth, is to be scraping up something against a rainy day, called the day of marriage; every one in our own vocation:—But what matter is it to me if my lord has routed the enemy, if I get nothing of their spoils? Alc. Say, is my lord victorious? Phæd. Why, he is victorious: indeed I prayed devoutly to Jupiter for a victory; by the same token, that you should give me ten pieces of gold if I brought you news of it. Alc. They are thine, supposing he be safe too. Phæd. Nay, that's a new bargain, for I vowed to Jupiter, that then you should give me ten pieces more; but I do undertake for my lord's safety, if you will please to discharge his godship Jupiter of the debt, and take it upon you to pay. Alc. When he returns in safety, Jupiter and I will pay your vow. Phæd. And I am sure I articled with Jupiter, that, if I brought you news that my lord was upon return, you should grant me one small favour more, that will cost you nothing. Alc. Make haste, thou torturer; is my Amphitryon upon return? Phæd. Promise me, that I shall be your bedfellow to-night, as I have been ever since my lord's absence; unless I shall be pleased to release you of your word. Alc. That's a small request; 'tis granted. Phæd. But swear by Jupiter. Alc. But why by Jupiter? Phæd. Because he's the greatest: I hate to deal with one of your little baffling gods, that can do nothing but by permission; but Jupiter can swinge you off, if you swear by him, and are forsworn. Alc. I swear by Jupiter. Phæd. Then—I believe he is victorious, and I know he is safe; for I looked through the key- hole, and saw him knocking at the gate; and I had the conscience to let him cool his heels there. Alc. And would'st thou not open to him? Oh, thou traitress! Phæd. No, I was a little wiser: I left Sosia's wife to let him in; for I was resolved to bring the news, and make my pennyworths out of him, as time shall show. Enter Jupiter, in the shape of Amphitryon, with Sosia's wife, Bromia. He kisses and embraces Alcmena. [25] [26] Jup. O let me live for ever on those lips! The nectar of the gods to these is tasteless. I swear, that, were I Jupiter, this night I would renounce my heaven, to be Amphitryon. Alc. Then, not to swear beneath Amphitryon's oath, (Forgive me, Juno, if I am profane,) I swear, I would be what I am this night, And be Alcmena, rather than be Juno. Brom. Good my lord, what is become of my poor bedfellow, your man Sosia? you keep such a billing and cooing here, to set one's mouth a watering—what I say, though I am a poor woman, I have a husband as well as my lady; and should be as glad as she, of a little honest recreation. Phæd. And what have you done with your old friend, and my old sweetheart, Judge Gripus? has he brought me home a crammed purse, that swells with bribes? if he be rich, I will make him welcome like an honourable magistrate; but if he has not had the wit to sell justice, he judges no causes in my court, I warrant him. Alc. My lord, you tell me nothing of the battle? Is Thebes victorious, are our foes destroyed? For, now I find you safe, I should be glad To hear you were in danger. Jup. [Aside.] A man had need be a god, to stand the fury of three talking women! I think, in my conscience, I made their tongues of thunder. Brom. [Pulling him on one side.] I asked the first question; answer me, my lord. Phæd. [Pulling him on the other side.] Peace! mine is a lover, and yours but a husband; and my judge is my lord too; the title shall take place, and I will be answered. [Aside. Jup. Sosia is safe; Gripus is rich; both coming; I rode before them, with a lover's haste.—— Was e'er poor god so worried? but for my love, I wish I were in heaven again with Juno. Alc. Then I, it seems, am last to be regarded? Jup. Not so, my love; but these obstreperous tongues Have snatched their answers first; they will be heard; And surely Jove would never answer prayer That woman made, but only to be freed From their eternal noise. Make haste to bed; There let me tell my story, in thy arms; There, in the gentle pauses of our love, Betwixt our dyings, ere we live again, Thou shalt be told the battle, and success; Which I shall oft begin, and then break off; For love will often interrupt my tale, And make so sweet confusion in our talk, That thou shalt ask, and I shall answer things, That are not of a piece; but patched with kisses, And sighs, and murmurs, and imperfect speech; And nonsense shall be eloquent, in love. Brom. [To Phædha.] My lord is very hot upon it: this absence is a great friend to us poor neglected wives; it makes us new again. Alc. I am the fool of love; and find within me The fondness of a bride, without the fear. My whole desires and wishes are in you. [27] [28]