-h tgs ee he wane se: a THE GATEWAY Volume XC Number 30 Thursday, 25 January, 2004 http://gateway.su.ualberta.ca/ Nine years Student-loan troubles mean ago, St Joe's more debt, student less credit, vanished says graduate James Elford Jhenifer Pabillano News STAFF AcTING News EprITor Losing a friend and fellow stu- A recent U of A graduate says dent is always difficult. Nine years that she has had to incur additional after a St Joseph's College student debts on her student loans as a disappeared, the school is continu- result of her bank's confusion. ing to mourn. It was 23 January, After completing her degree at 4992, when Dean Mortensen dis- the U of A, the woman, who wishes appeared without a trace. to be known only as Carolyn, “There's no real resolution,” thought she would be able to pay explained Jim Stenberg, Director her loans off quickly and easily of Residence at St Joseph's College, through CIBC. Instead, she encoun- “just a long waiting.” tered a series of obstacles and It has now been nine years of slip-ups that continue to affect her waiting endured by the students financial status today. of St Joe’s and the family of Dean "Students should be aware of Mortensen. The first-year science what can happen [with their student had been at The Ship, the loans]," said Carolyn. “How can bar in Lister Hall, and was return- you have confidence knowing there ing home after midnight with a few is an institution that isn’t respond- friends when he vanished. ing to your needs?” "It was maybe 150 yards away In August, Carolyn filled out and from the dorms,” explained forwarded documentation to CIBC Stenberg, “and I believe someone applying for a Loan Consolidation forgot something, so they sepa- and Interest Relief Status. Carl Schreuders, Keith Wood, Kate Rossiter / THE GATEWAY rated from Mortenson. Steve Lillebuen searches for the ‘real’ Satanists. What he found may shock you. See page 13. With Loan Consolidation, her “The next day, another friend from iit existing student loans would be residence noticed he missed his combined into one sum. morning class, which he never does.” Under Interest Relief Status— Because the police would not available: only to individuals in begin a missing-person search for specific financial standing—the 24 hours, students organized a province would pay the loan inter- Today search for their missing classmate. est for up to two years until cir- “There was a snowstorm coming cumstances permitted Carolyn to in, and we wanted to find evidence 22 Vampire flicks are tasty, no? begin payments. of where he'd been before snow However, in November, the CIBC came,” said Stenberg. Yet they National Student Loan Centre Quote for the day: could find no trace of Mortenson. apparently sent Carolyn sent a PLEASE SEE “ST JOE’S” ON PAGE 2 So long, and thanks for all the fish! letter indicating that she was — Douglas Adams “delinquent in my payments and Halifax student that I needed to start making pay- ments as interest was accruing.” This day in the Gateway’s history: paper may fold Hoping that the matter could be The Gateway published its first resolved easily, Carolyn contacted edible issue. Social Credit student the National Student Loan Centre. leader William Downton lost an She spoke to three separate indi- Andrew Gillis election bet, and, as punishment, viduals working for the Centre, and THE GAZETTE he was forced to eat an issue of says that each of them refused to the Gateway. “He can baste, boil, let her speak to a manager. HALIFAX (CUP) — The Picaro, or smother the edition in ketchup Carolyn says that she was even- Mount Saint Vincent University's or pickle juice, so long as-the con- tually told that an investigation into student newspaper, may shut down glomeration he eats is, or was, the her complaint could be initiated— because it hasn't seen any funding Gateway,” said the delectable front but that such a task could take from the Student Union. page article. Downton later ate the months to complete. During those The SU hasn't given the newspa- paper with exlax and butterscotch. months, the interest would con- per the student money that makes 1956 tinue to accrue, further increasing up 40 to 60 per cent of its budget. her debt. The loss of funding leaves She claims she was then told Index Melissa Melanson, Editor-in-Chief that a collection agent might be of the Picaro, in the awkward posi- News 1-5 sent after her if she did not begin tion of trying to find $15 000. She making payments. Opinion 5-7 said the future doesn’t look good. Carolyn eventually contacted Sports 9-11 "From their position, they are Anthony Ciplione, a Repayment not funding us because they don't Feature 13-15 Specialist with the Loan Centre. have the money,” Melanson said. Arts & Entertainment 22-26 She says that Ciplione assured her “It really isn’t feasible for a she would owe nothing. But a month Comics 27 school our size to have a paper later, Carolyn received another call without funding. We print 3000 Classifieds ~ 28 regarding payment of the loan. issues every two weeks. In order Contacting Ciplione again, she for us to have money on top to was apparently told that her Notice cover more than just our printing Carl Schreuders / THE GATEWAY Consolidation Agreement had been costs, we'd have to run a paper This performer from the Brian Webb Dance Company spun like a pulsar There will be no Gateway on Tuesday, received but not recorded and her that is extremely small and almost during a performance called ‘Pulsar Project 08 33 minus 45’ last weekend. 30 January. The editors will all be Interest Relief Status form was not entirely advertising,” she said. The dance is based on radio emissions from the Vela Pulsar, which is a very out of town, see? Hold our calls ... on file. PLEASE SEE “PICARO” ON PAGE 2 fast spinning star. AstronoWatch columnist Kati Kovacs swoons. Please recycle this newspaper PLEASE SEE “LOAN” ON PAGE 4 2 ‘THe Gareway Thursday, 25 January, 20041 Maude Barlow to speak downtown THE GATEWAY é Volume XC Number 30 Thursday, 25 January, 4334 Andra Olson a representative from St Stephen’s sa NEWS STAFF College. "This is part of a lecture fariond series we put on every year. Her Published since 21 November, 1910 Circulation 10 000 at‘Ye r Some might call Maude Barlow speech should not be missed.” HE | the female Noam Chomsky. Others Barlow has written or co-writ- Editor-in-Chief APALLEfYeLos SIPYEAF,TFL R ; I would plainly call her a political ten eight books, published a pleth- 2 Dan Lazin 4 cd Wit saviour. The proactive Canadian ora of political essays, and is the ts [email protected] 492-5168 activist has fought in a variety of national volunteer chairperson for major social battles, ranging from the Council of Canadians, a non- Managing Editor World Trade Organization troubles partisan, non-profit public interest Mike Winters to media mogul Conrad Black. group with over 100 000 members. [email protected] 492-2019 On Tuesday, 30 January, the pas- “Global rules could paralyze us," sionate speaker will be visiting Barlow has written. In an article News Editors Edmonton. Presented in a lecture published in the National Post, Neil Parmar & Jhen Pabillano series sponsored by St Stephen's Barlow called the global “transfor- [email protected] 492-1483 College, Barlow will talk at 7:30pm mation ... an all out assault on vir- Jon Dunbar at the Robinson/Wesley United tually every public sphere of life, [email protected] 492-1483 Church downtown. including the democratic under- Sports Editor “We are pleased to have her,” said pinning of our legal system.” Barrie Tanner Picaros funding cut by Halifax SU [email protected] 492-5068 Entertainment Editor Dave Alexander “PICARO” CONTINUED FROM PAGE 1 was only agreed to in principle. [email protected] 492-7052 “That isn't a quality product for Part of that contract states the Patrick Finlay / THE GATEWAY our students," Melanson continued. newspaper would pay for 40 to 60 Features Editor St Joe’s residents decorated the building with jerseys in Mortenson’s memory. She said the union money only per cent of its operating budget. Chul-Ahn (Jimmy) Jeong St Joe’s students remember covers printing costs, and does not That contract was breached last [email protected] 492-5178 cover staff honoraria or other bills. year, Nickerson said, in several Melanson, like the rest of her staff, different ways. The main breach Photo Editor comrade who disappeared hasn't been paid yet this year. was the Picaro’s failure to raise the Marc Bence “We are the only form of student 40 per cent of their budget not cov- [email protected] 492-1482 media on campus. So as far as ered by the SU. s voicing student concerns, we are it. "We ended up giving them over Production Editor “ST JOE’S” CONTINUED FROM PAGE 1 with?” asked Stenberg. There is nothing else. And really, $25 000," Nickerson said. "Mean- David Zeibin “A couple of weeks later, a librar- Mortensen's disappearance has why shouldn't Mount Saint Vincent while, they only raised $1800 by [email protected] 492-3423 ian, Paula Sheedy, was walking had a lasting effect on the closely have a newspaper?” themselves. So, I think a lot of the from her home and noticed in the knit community of the 50-man The Picaro staff say they were blame and responsibility has to lie Circulation Manager backyard of a house what looked dorm at St Joseph’s College. assured by the Student Union with the paper right now. ... Not Raymond Biesinger like a [St Joe's] Rangers hat.” The Memorials have been held ever throughout the summer and school only that, but our student news- [email protected] 492-5178 hat turned out to be Mortenson’‘s. since for Mortenson, but Stenberg year that the paper would be receiv- paper has not been run in a fash- A number of hypotheses were said that there was a sense of help- ing money. But during a union ion that you would expect. They proposed, but none of them seem to lessness in the whole situation. meeting in December, a budget was haven't been accountable to us.” solve the question of Mortenson’s “What do you do when someone passed with no money in it for the Melanson said those accusations disapearence. “He was a runner,” disappears? What can you do?” Picaro. are ridiculous. “It was the responsi- The Gateway is a member of the according to Stenberg, and some Still, the students of St Joe's dorm Colette Nickerson, President of bility of that year’s Student Union to Canadian University Press have suggested that he went for a make an annual effort to raise the Students’ Union, said expenses keep watch of their funds. Now we run and fell in the river. However, awareness of Mortensen’s dis- incurred by past union executives are being punished for it.” STUDENTS Stenberg notes that in those cir- appearance with ribbons,, formal are just one of the reasons why the Nickerson thinks that it is very UNION cumstances a body “normally turns dress, and by putting their Rangers Picaro didn't receive funding this important for the university to have up.” jerseys up on the outside of the year. a student newspaper, but she said it See Suicide also seems unlikely, as dormitory. "I don't think that we should say cannot continue to berunasit has in The Gateway is published by Mortenson did not seem to be Since the disappearance, the Picaro is the only place that the past. “I want the budget broken the University of Alberta Students’ Union depressed at the time, nor did he Safewalk has started up and gen- we cut the funds,” Nickerson said. down on a piece of paper showing For advertising information, contact give off any other signs or seem to eral awareness of safety issues has “Funds were cut in every single where the money is spent." Cassandra McLean have any concerns that might have increased. line item in our budget." "If we thought we would get the 2-900 Students’ Union Building University of Alberta led him to such. Police apparently Mortenson's disappearance, of Nickerson said the situation is funds if we showed the student Edmonton, T6G 2J7_. followed the advice of some clair- course, remains unsolved. For their incorrectly being made to look like union our budget, we would do it,” (780) 492-4244 voyants, given their lack of leads. part, the residents of the St Joe’s an SU vendetta against the Picaro. Melanson argued. “But we know er “All probable things have been dorm do the only thing they can do: Nickerson said the existing con- that they are not going to Change The Gateway is a student newspaper serving the University of Alberta. All materials appearing in ruled out, so what are you left “we remember him.” tract between the SU and the Picaro their mind on this one.” the Gateway bear copyright of the Gateway and their creators and may not be used without written COUNCIL FORUM consent. The University of Alberta Students’ Union may hold joint ownership of materials appearing in the Gateway. For clarification of ownership, con- tact the Editor-in-Chief or the Students’ Union Vice- Students’ Council meets every second Tuesday in the Council Chambers President (Student Life). eee in University Hall. Council meetings are open to all students. Opinions expressed in the pages of the Gateway are expressly those of the author and do not necessar- The Students’ Council meeting were discussions a few years back, tives a happy Business Week, and with his plan to put all groups ily reflect those of the Gateway. eae on 23 January was perhaps the lon- there were no such plans this made a remark about a giant that receive student levys to ref- The Gateway is created using Apple Macintosh gest of the year. The meeting began year, “thankfully.” Recently, Mount banner that was hung in the erendum every four to five years. Computers, Hewlett-Packard ScanJet 3c and Umax Astra 6008 flatbed scanners, and a Polaroid Sprint- at 6:34pm, and ended shortly after Royal College in Calgary approved stairwell of the Civil/Electrical Speakers from WUSC and Student Scan 35 Plus optical film scanner. Adobe InDesign 44:00pm. Council left without cov- such a plan. Engineering Building that mocked Legal Services, both of which is used for layout. Adobe Illustrator is used for ering many items of the agenda, e. Samuel reported that the engineers. Apparently the banner currently receive a student levy, vector images while Adobe Photoshop is used for raster images. The Gatewahyas a hot and bothered all of which will be added to the Bookstore Taskforce meeting was was put up by Business students. It denounced the legislation’s execu- Hewlett-Packard LaserJet 5000N, which is used to agenda of next meeting. considering declaring the has since been partially torn down tion, if not its intent. Council voted produce paste-up images of the pages. The Gate- The first one-and-a-half hours Bookstore a self-sufficient service by Engineering students. to send the legislation back to the way's games of choice are Dave Dobson's marvel- ous Snood, and Sid Meier's Civilization II Gold. of council were taken up by VP unit. “The Bookstore will officially ¢ Council was split on Harlow’s executive for consideration. (Student Life) Jen Wanke’s presen- be recognized as a non-business proposal to redistribute seats on ¢ In the final minute of Council, Contributors tation on the Gateway's autonomy that must break even, as opposed Council. The legislation was split, President Leslie Church pleaded for proposal, and the debate that fol- to a business that must produce a and split again, and each frag- Council to ratify Bruce McRae and James Elford, Steve Lillebuen, Johanna lowed. profit.” ment was voted on separately Jason Curran as Deputy Returning Green, Ray Carrath, Stacy Ruttan, To substitute for Recording e Samuel congratulated the and approved. The plan called for Officers for the next election. There Fish Griwkowsky, Rotating Dog, Andra Secretary Sarah Kelly, who was Education Students’ Association increasing the number of seats will now be a total of three DROs Olson, Bill “Ninny” Benson, Julian recently appointed Deputy for organizing Education Week. for the Arts and Science faculties. for the next election, instead of the Cheung, Jahan Jarrah, Albert Guill- Returning Officer, Speaker Stella Samuel reported gleefully that he Some councilors, particularly the usual two. ermo, Carl Schreuders, Keith Wood, Varvis introduced her little sister, had bested Education Councilor Engineering reps, voiced concerns ¢ The executive planned to ask Kris Berezanski, Chris Wagner, Van- Thea Varvis. Varvis Senior asked Robert Hartery in a sumo wres- that the plan would stack Council Council to approve the transfer essa McLeod, Kate Rossiter, Patrick Finlay, Daniel Kaszor, Ryan Ocerous, council to speak very slowly. tling match. VP (Ops & Finance) with councilors from the large fac- of $4 013 664 from the reserves of Iva Janiga, Adam Houston, Captain Gregory Harlow, who “got [his] butt ulties, stifling the smaller faculties. various funds to the fund to expand Collin Gallant, Vianne Fung, the CUP Other business whipped" by Hartery, reported that A plan was also discussed to annul SUB. The majority was unspent newswire, Adam Rozenhart, Owen ¢ One of the councillors asked the event was “a hot, sweaty, mis- the positions of the Residence Hall Access Fund money originally Livermore, Chris Boutet, Kate Rossiter, if the Students’ Union was con- erable experience.” Association Rep and the President intended for emergency bursaries. interim news editors Jhen Pabillano, sidering a mandatory laptop plan ¢ In a faculty report, the of the University Athletics Board, The proposal was not discussed at Neil Parmar, and Kavana, and the Chi- for students. VP (Academic) Chris Engineering representatives but was later rejected. the Council meeting because time nese New Year. Happy 4334! This is the Samuel replied that although there wished the Business representa- ¢ Harlow also drew heavy fire ran too short. year of the Harvey G Thomgirt. I'm off Compiled by Jon Dunbar to Simon Fraser University! THE GaTEWAY 3 Thursday, 25 January, 2004 ¥’* "We value your eyes, and we'll prove it yf Ja by offering the very best in optical care “= at everyday low prices." Now featuring Club Monaco Frames Conveniently located in College Plaza 8217-112 Street, Edmonton, AB T6G 2C8& VQUISITION NIK ROFEELYA 0 nh EM nausuria ror 4) you Cars 1P RAAN I LS CLASSIC ALTERNATIVE WITH EDDIE LUNCHPAIL & SIMON LEBONDAGE SRECIALS FREEOOM FRIDAYS Keith Wood / THE GATEWAY Volunteers supporting APIRG have been collecting signatures all week in SUB. > WNIICTKHY MTIAHGEO , NJEACXOUB S § GTUREISBTES PIRG petition nearly complete SATURDAYS SUCK Student group hopes to double signature requirement for referendum ALTERNATIVE & PUNK DJS BLUE JAY & NIK ROFEELYA Julian Cheung that work on various issues affect- able to opt out of the levy. ing students. The first PIRG was There have been two previous NEWS STAFF established in the early 1970s with attempts at creating a PIRG at the the help of social activist Ralph U of A, but both were unsuccessful PRESENTED BY FOOSH & SUGARBEAT 1g “Just sign it!” should now be a Nader, now leader of the American as not enough signatures were col- Kool Hand Lue & BJ Thred DEEP HOUSE AND ALL THINGS SEXY familiar expression to a lot of U of Green Party. The first Canadian lected. A students. PIRG was set up three years later, This year’s volunteers must col- ~ SUBURBS It's the catchphrase of students and now there are 19 Canadian lect 2500 undergraduate signa- who are attempting to start the chapters, as well as over 200 tures before 1 February in order Alberta Public Interest Research American ones. to put the issue to referendum. Group (APIRG) at the U of A. Students working to put this Volunteers estimate that they have 10167-112ST INFO: 413-4578 According to members, they are issue to referendum are asking for already collected 2300 signatures, FYE NAC PEYVSUPESUPERRESEe COEEQQOELINMAANEE C OOM just 200 signatures away from put- a $2.50 per term increase ($1.25 and aim to collect 5000 before the ting the issue to a binding referen- for part-time students) in non- 4 February deadline. OPWEiN W7E D2 1/T7_O >S U2NA ALFT RAOPMS 9A E PMD_ TAOP O 3 AaMe dum at the Students’ Union election instructional student fees starting Tables promoting the cause will in March. September 2004. If the motion is be set up in the Education Building PIRGs are student-run groups approved, students will also be on Thursday and in SUB on Friday. So, you think you know accountants ? Student part in upcoming Quebec free-trade protest will keep Canadians from ‘being robbed’ Vianne Fung speaking in French, translating in is also a lineage of activism in NEWS STAFF ~ Québec City as well as spreading her family. “My mom used to tell principles on awareness. me that the only way to change a TAKE ANOTHER LOOK The group will be concentrating system is to either work around it Preparations have already begun primarily on the effect of the glo- or work with it,” Dube said. by some U of A students to attend a balisation of co-operations and the "T've always liked to get involved spring free-trade protest in Quebec concept of a corporate world domi- because I see life passing me by. City. nating modern society. It's best for those of us who are Zita Dubé, a third-year Music "To a certain extent, it’s patri- able to help others to have a say,” and Faculté St Jean student, will otism. My concern is that we [as Dube said. join other U of A students and pro- Canadians] are being robbed by FTAA is concerned with expand- testers at a protest against the other countries. That's hazardous ing North American trade, as alleged hazards of the Free Trade to Canada. Products won't have the quoted in the North American Free Quiet guys in visors who Area of the Americas (FTAA) as same quality, and resources will Trade Agreement (NAFTA), to all sit at their desks all day, part of the upcoming Summit of the run dry,” Dubé said. the other countries of the Western Americas in Québec City in mid- She was also an organiser of the Hemisphere except Cuba, enabling adding numbers, April. PEAS protest last month, where it to become the single largest balancing the books. One of her principles is that the she performed soprano solos in free trade zone in the world. That © best way to change in the world is an effect to boost the morale of summit will focus on negotiations Bean counters. to use your voice. “If people don't students protesting raising tuition toward establishing the Free Trade [voice their views], then there's no prices. Area of the Americas (FTAA), the Pencil pushers. reason to believe that there will be According to Dubé, her interest OECD Initiative on Financial Take another look. change at all,” Dubé emphasized. and enthusiasm in social socials Centers, crime, drugs, small arms As a native Francophone, Dubé arose primarily after joining the and the HIV/AIDS crisis in the will assist with training people in U of A PEAS movement, but there hemisphere. Discover the real world of Chartered Accountants. Social issues on agenda for Int’l Week Join the Student Mentorship Program. The Institute of Chartered Accountants of Alberta Vianne Fung by the University's International of lectures and seminars on these Edmonton: (780) 424-7391 NEWS STAFF - Centre to promote international issues and will take place at Other Alberta: 1-800-232-9406 issues on campus. various venues throughout the Fax: (780) 425-8766 All global citizens at the U of A The week's themes for facie: University. BUSSCHIONOLE SOFS [email protected] are invited to join in International sion will include consumerism, The kickstart of the week is eppertanities beyondn umbers Week 2004 for a gala of issues that the arms trade, culture, health, on Friday, 26 January at noon will affect us all. global domination and develop- in HUB Mall. There will be per- Visit us at www.calearn.com A gala of events dedicated to the ment, migration, environmental formances by the West African week, which runs from 29 January issues, and education. Music Ensemble and the Tilo Paiz to 2 February, have been organized The events will consist mainly Drummers. NEWS 4 The Gareway Thursday, 25 January, 2004 Loan director says grad’s forms not received “LOAN” CONTINUED FROM PAGE 1 When contacted in regard to the I’ve always had every intention of paying this loan off. number is correct and consistent Carolyn says that Ciplione told situation, CIBC Communications intention of paying this loan Without it, I would never have through all your paperwork.” her that there was not much he Director Rob McLeod stated that been able to achieve my BA or my Should students encounter obsta- off. Without it, Iw ould never could do about the situation and Carolyn's Interest Relief Status Masters. I had every intention of cles similar to Carolyn’s, SFAIC probably nothing anyone else could forms had not been received by the have been able to achieve honouring the debt I owed. It’s been can aid in resolving the matter. “We do. In addition, he allegedly told bank, sending her loan immedi- my BA or myM asters. I a really challenging experience have contacts with these financial her that he was “not God and does ately into repayment status. had every intention of to go through. No one’s been left institutions and can talk to the rep- not have God's phone number." “It's not totally unusual for things accountable here except myself.” resentatives on your behalf,” said honouring the debt I owed. Ciplione did not return phone like this to happen,” said McLeod. Clare Gautier-Villon, director of Gautier-Villon. calls to the Gateway. "There are a lot of issues that arise It’s been a really challenging the Student Financial Aid and "Another option is the ombuds- On the advice of her local CIBC from students not sending in the experience to go through. No Information Centre (SFAIC), said man from the Canadian Banking branch, Carolyn eventually con- correct forms.” one’s been left accountable that there are ways students can Association, an independent body tacted the CIBC Ombudsman to But Carolyn claims that “the help protect themselves from prob- that can investigate complaints here except myself. register her complaints. Interest Relief Status form was the lems such as these. from an outside perspective.” “The Ombudsman wouldn't look very first form I sent off to them." "It is very, very important that Starting 4 March, the national — Carolyn, U of A graduate at [the complaint] until the loan McLeod acknowledged that the students ... keep copies of all the student loan program will no longer centre had done its investigation,” supporting documentation for her of the late payments now well past paperwork they send. Students be handled by the different she said. "Over that period, more Interest Relief Status form had $1000, Carolyn’s credit rating has need to be able to retain their Canadian financial institutions. debt would accrue. They could sit been received, but the form itself been negatively affected. own proof of their application. It’s Management will be transferred on it for months and I could end up was not on file. She still finds it hard to believe also important to double-check all to Edulinx, which is 54 per cent owing thousands extra while wait- With CIBC continuing to pres- that her bank could be so unre- the information filled out on forms. owned by CIBC and 49 per cent ing for action to be taken." sure her for payment and the sum sponsive. "I've always had every Definitely make sure your SIN owned by US interests. Two arrested in small-arms factory protest Melinda Gibson ONTARION GUELPH, ON (CUP) — Two people were arrested at a protest last week against Kitchener’s small arms manufacturer, Diemaco. Over 120 people gathered 45 January at a non-violent demon- stration organized by Homes Not Bombs, an anti-poverty activist group that believes federal monies should not be spent on arms, but rather.on housing and other social needs. . The decision to protest was made after Diemaco rejected the group's request to allow two dozen mem- ; bers to inspect its premises for vio- lations of international law. "We came to Diemaco to voice our outrage that this government- funded corporation creates instru- ments of death in our community while thousands of people go hungry and without shelter in our neighbourhoods,” said protestor Josh Shook. "Ultimately, the group believes that the public has a right to know what is going on in the Diemaco premises because they are receiv- ing federal monies," said Matthew Behrens, a representative from Homes Not Bombs. Access to Diemaco’s premises is limited to staff, various gov- ernment agents, and clients, said Frances Vegh of Diemaco’s Human Resources Department. "While we respect your right to express your views, we would like to point out that Diemaco is a pri- vate company and for obvious rea- sons it is a secure facility with access limited to those people who do business with us," said Vegh. "It's our property. They asked—we declined.” Diemaco is a sector of the Devtek Corporation, a Canadian public ig can help you company that can only sell arms id we have the through the federal government. Anne Healey, a representative INVEST| Qa Le $3. ROYAL from the Canadian Defence MUTUAL Industry Association has stated . FUNDS that Diemaco’s foreign clients are limited to Canada’s NATO allies. Make the most of your dreams.™ Self-proclaimed as “Canada’s leading small-arms manufacturer” Diemaco designs and produces small arms such as the C# Assault Rifle, the M203A1 Grenade Royal Mutual Funds are sold by Royal Mutual Funds Inc., member of Royal Bank Financial Gro™uT rapde.mar k of Royal Bank of Canada. Royal Mutual Funds Inc. is a licensee of this trademark. Launcher, and CG762 Chain Gun. OPINION [email protected] Thursday, 25 January, 2004 THE GATEWAY EDITORIAL Mercy killing ought to be a separate crime IF you vote for a Public Interest Killing someone is undoubtedly by minimizing her pain as much the worst offense any human can as possible, or by permitting an Researon Group We. Can WOK oan . commit against another. It's institution to do so." These options common sense that murder, in any would not have helped Tracy to behalke o the public Ana form, should be discouraged and live any less painful of a life than punished. she was. Death was the only option But mercy killing doesn’t need to which Latimer had to completely not be influenced by er ivate receive the same severity of pun- end his daughter's pain. ishment. If you are killing some- The courts twice asked Latimer one in order to end their suffering, if he was remorseful. Both times Corporate interesk you are not doing it—at least not he answered with a blatant no. Of purely—as a selfish act. course he’s not sorry for killing his Euthanasia should not be an daughter. I speculate that Latimer offence which receives ten years in is sitting in his jail cell, wishing prison. It is murder, yes, but it is a that he could have denied his much lesser form of murder. There parental instincts and killed her should be four degrees of murder: pain earlier. first degree, second degree, mercy The Supreme Court of Canada killing, and manslaughter. justified not inventing a murder The Robert Latimer case is the clause of “mercy killing” by uphold- prime example of a murder commit- ing the most basic fundamental ted to end constant pain. It doesn't human right to live. What they are make sense that this loving father forgetting is the unwritten human should be punished with a penalty right to a good life. Being in con- as harsh as ten years’ imprison- stant pain for twelve years is by no ment. Latimer did not commit a self- means a good life. ish, cold-blooded murder; he gave If Tracy Latimer could have his severely disabled daughter what expressed her wishes, I believe she he considered a gift. This was the would have wanted to end her pain. only thing that he could dotorid his « Her father realized this and made daughter of her pain. a heroic act, but he also denied life. The Supreme Court did not see His sentence should better reflect murder as Latimer’s only choice. that balance. They claimed that Latimer “could have struggled on, with what was Marcus Bence unquestionably a difficult situa- PHOTO EDITOR tion, by helping [Tracy] to live and ups, expensive textbooks and fre- that natural gas is non-renewable I love fat old rockers LETTERS quently changing editions. and doesn't reduce CO, emissions, For the most part, it would seem not too many greens are jumping as though there are no solutions for joy. Regarding Adam _ Houston's Using confederate First, and most importantly, we in sight and that everyone is com- Contrary to Mr Skoworodko's review of the Guess Who's Running do appreciate all the support the pletely content with maintaining opinion, damming rivers and flood- Back Thru Canada live disc (18 flag in Quad uncool Gateway has given us. But in the status quo. But nothing could ing actually does hurt the atmo- January), I would like to offer the regards to Ehab Shawar’s remark be further from the truth. sphere—not only do the decaying following rebuttal: fuck you. that the Gateway is the only media One of the first things that I trees release CO,, but they are no The Guess Who are rock ‘n roll It's bad enough that students, that covers us, he’s wrong. We have did as your VP Academic is con- longer available to absorb it. But gods! Granted, they are fat, bald- engineers and members of facul- been covered in many Edmonton vince the U of A administration to fear not, Greg—this hasn't stopped ing, over-the-hill gods, but they ties had to deal with the poster- papers and we're also covered on create a Bookstore taskforce that us from doing it anyway. are gods nevertheless, which their pollution, sausage-party songs and CFRN and the A-Channel. would thoroughly examine critical And the fear of displacing nat- album reflects. After attending annoying posturing that character- But you are correct in that the issues confronting the Bookstore, ural habitats hasn't gotten in the their Edmonton show last summer, ized Engineering Week. But it was Gateway is our biggest supporter and then make key recommenda- way of building dams either. In fact, I bought the CD in December, and I especially disappointing to see an ‘and I can assure you that my team- tions to resolve these issues. This BC Hydro is now investing in wind have not stopped listening since. engineer proudly fly the Battle Flag mates and myself are very pleased taskforce has met several times energy—not because it wants to Since my discman’s batteries of the Confederacy in the middle of with what the newspaper has done over the year, and we have made stop flooding habitats, but because died two weeks ago, I haven't even Quad last week. for us. excellent progress on a few major it has run out of rivers to dam and left my house (although this isn’t While I'm sure no harm was Second, we do not expect the concerns. I am confident that once mice to displace. necessarily unusual). The only intended, the Battle Flag of the Gateway to make us look good. If our work is done, we will have sig- We may be selling CANDU reac- thing that could have improved Confederation represents a side you were a regular reader of the nificantly altered the Bookstore’s tors overseas, but we're also still the CD would have-been a guest that struggled to oppress people of sports, then you would see that our operations for the benefit of stu- selling them leaded gasoline. appearance by Paul Simon. different color. results and standings do that for dents. Yes, solar power is not up to Oh, and another thing: if a band Even if the flag had minor differ- themselves. So, Mr Boutet, it might just be speed, nor is nuclear fission, but misspells the word “through” on an ences from the official flag (it lacks Our biggest concern was why possible to get that textbook fired perhaps these high gas prices will album, it is for good reason. We may the white stripes), seeing it was dis- the Gateway would print an article out of a pneumatic tube directly open our eyes to the reality that not understand what the reason is, turbing, nonetheless—it will still that projected a negative opinion at your head. If anyone has any alternatives have never been sub- but this does not give us the right ‘be recognized as a Confederacy of our team without defending us. concerns or questions about the stantially invested in. to correct that misspelling if we flag. We understand what a sports com- Bookstore, please feel free to con- Meanwhile, we are continuing to decide to write a shitty review. I strongly encourage speech. But mentary is and we recognize the tact me. use more and more energy. So, in conclusion: fuck you. I also suggest that people consider Gateway's freedom to print one. Now it’s to the point that our Also, Lenny Kravitz sucks. the implications of what the flag We had only hoped that if they CHRIS SAMUEL shortsightedness has finally caught means before using it. were to print one, the article would VP ACADEMIC up to us. STEVE SMITH support our team in a more posi- Maybe it's time we looked for MICHAEL TAERUM tive manner. renewable solutions instead of COMPUTING SCIENCE blaming people who have been LORI SHUPAK Greed is to blame for trying to prevent this all along. Letters to the editor should be PANDAS HOCKEY Maybe it's time we stopped being dropped off at room 0-10 of the Stu- high energy prices such energy gluttons and realize dents’ Union Building, or e-mailed Panda pleased with that our over-consumption has to [email protected]. brought about this problem. I can The Gateway reserves the right Gateway support Taskforce gets tough I felt the need to respond to admit it and accept it; why can't to edit letters for length and clarity, Greg Skoworodko’'s letter ("Blame you? and to refuse publication of letters on Bookstore! energy prices on environmental- If you think this is expensive, it deems racist, sexist, libelous, or As a player of the Pandas Hockey ists," 23 January) and shed a little wait until you see what the clean-up otherwise hateful in nature. team, I am writing to clear up light on the reality of our high gas bills will be. Letters to the editor should be no some confusion that arose after Chris Boutet's article ("New prices. longer than 350 words in length and a response to a sports commen- semester; same old crap,” 44 First of all, Greg, find me some TIM WEIS include the name, student identifi- tary ("Unfair Panda play brought January) highlights numerous his- environmentalists who are MECHANICAL ENGINEERING cation number, program, and year about Dino-defeating changes," 14 torical concerns that students have appeased by natural gas as a solu- of study of the author, to be consid- January). regarding the Bookstore: long line- tion to our energy problem. Given ered for publication. OPINION 6 THe Gareway Thursday, 25 January, 2004 Ailing prison system needs restorative justice SU must respect student decisions Restorative justice, which focuses on rehabilitation rather SU must find ways to make those changes within its current regular than punishment, is an alternative to incarceration which is budget structure, or else it must arguably less costly and a more effective system. ask students for additional money to pay for the expansion. It cannot Nations peoples. males constitute 38 per cent of take money that was specifically Restorative justice focuses on prison populations (50 per cent approved for a certain service and restoring balance after a crime among females). These statistics just redistribute it as it sees fit. has been committed. Emphasis is are disturbing when you consider Full-time students each pay Janan Jarrah placed on healing, harmony, and that aboriginals make up only 3.5 Dan Lazin about $45 per year to ensure that mediation. The process involves per cent of Canada’s entire popula- the Access Fund, a last-resort bur- the victim, offender, and the com- tion. sary program, exists. I, like many ‘Canada’s criminal justice system munity. Through the structure of a This over-representation is The Students’ Union executive others, am happy to pay that fee is a failure. healing circle, victims and offend- largely due to the fact that, on brought a troubling proposal to because I feel that itis important to The justice system has an anti- ers interact with each other directly average, aboriginals are less finan- Students’ Council on Tuesday— ensure that schooling is affordable. quated, ineffective and very expen- to attempt resolving negative feel- cially secure than non-aboriginals shunting $750 000 of unspent stu- I do not have the same strength sive method of punishment and ings arising from the crime. and often cannot afford to pay dent bursary into a fund to pay for in my commitment to a prettier, deprivation, rather than rehabilita- Unlike our current court system, fines levied upon them. Therefore, renovations to SUB. or more usable, Students’ Union tion. healing circles place more atten- they are sent to prison. Poverty is The proposal didn’t make it to Building. Students paying Access The federal government spends tion on the victim. Victims are given clearly a disadvantage. the floor, since Council didn't have Fund fees, in the present or the billions of dollars each year just to an outlet to express their feelings Because restorative justice enough time to get through the day's past, must be assured that their operate its criminal justice system. and offenders can see the negative focuses on healing rather than business. It has been moved to the money is going directly to the ser- Taxpayers spend approximately consequences of their criminal incarceration, fewer people would agenda for next Tuesday's meeting. vices that they were promised. $59 000 per year to incarcerate one actions directly. Of course, this be sent to jail—reducing costs. That should prove for some inter- Since the fund’s inception, the SU male offender and $64 000 for one process can be both humbling and I don't totally agree that it should esting debate; after all, how can has had difficulty in finding stu- female offender. shaming for the offender. be applied to serious crimes such the SU consider spending what dents needy enough to fit the strin- The government boasts that Admittedly, when I first heard as murder, rape, or child molesta- was supposed to be bursary money gent requirements of application. Canada is a leader in criminal jus- about restorative justice, I was tion, but I do believe it would work on building renovations? Regard- That problem has apparently been tice, yet we have the second high- skeptical. Like many others, I with lesser crimes. The majority of less of how necessary the building fixed by lowering the requirements, est rate of incarceration in the believed the system would be too offenders in Canada are thieves and expansion may be, it’s simply but there is now $750 000 in built-up world—only the United States has lenient. Critics of this model ofj us- property offenders, not murderers. undemocratic to reapportion reserves for the fund. The SU thinks a greater proportion of citizens in tice describe it as too idealistic and While restorative justice is not money that was approved, by ref- it can’t get rid of that money. prison. not realistic for this day and age. a panacea for all crimes, there is -erendum, fora vastly different ser- Tuition next year will of course be Our: rate of imprisonment is They view it as a mere slap on the merit in using it in addition to or vice than its new intent. higher than ever. Surely everyone especially discouraging when you wrist and thus, quite ineffective. as an alternative to our current SU President Leslie Church could use a little relief from that. If consider that many inmates are Now, as mentioned before, our system—especially for poverty- explained to me that the executive they don’t think there are enough released from prison only to re- incarceration rate and the cost to stricken individuals or for lesser feels that the building expansion dangerously needy students for the offend once again. It's time to find taxpayers speak for themselves. But crimes. will effectively make scholarship money, then they how about giving new solutions to our growing jus- one of our bigger social problems Prison environments are innately and bursary money easier for stu- everyone a break? A $750 000 dona- tice problems. __ is the way our justice system dis- hostile and stressful, thus making dents to access, since all of the tion to the University would lower An alternative to traditional criminates against minorities and it very difficult to successfully financial services would be consol- tuition by $30 per student. incarceration has been proposed, the poor. This is especially obvious rehabilitate offenders. idated in one physical location. That is much more consistent and is arguably less costly and when it comes to aboriginals. At the very least, the govern- That may be so. It may also be so with the purpose for which students more effective than our current Restorative justice would directly ment should try implementing this that SUB renovation would make approved the original tax. If the SU system of justice. This alternative address the problem of aboriginal system instead of merely passing the University a more comfortable is going to ask its constituents how is known as restorative justice, and over-representation in Canada's judgment on its effectiveness and place to hang about; these would to spend their money, it ought to its origins date back to early First criminal justice system. Aboriginal legitimacy without attempting it. both be valuable services. But the stick hard and fast to the answers. OPINION THE GATEWAY 7 Thursday, 25 January, 2004 Toast, Karl Marx and celery: what's the connection? THE BURLAP SACK This particular Burlap Sack is Chris Boutet fulfills all your wishes and desires and magically makes the above items relate to each other somehow rather obscure, but it’s something that’s bothered me for a long time: I remember someone once said to me that Cheez Whiz was guys shouldn’t wear Oilers jerseys one ingredient away from plastic. Which I suppose is a lot like with the names of their favorite player on the back. saying that cotton candy is two steps away from fiberglass. It’s odd that a grown man can up to your elbow. Don’t you have can't afford good food is also tasty get away with wearing another any consumer awareness? I mean, with peanut butter and raisins. man’s name as a form of admi- really—you've got to get more polit- But did you know that the con- ration without it seeming effemi- ical, or this relationship just isn’t cept of toasting bread was actu- nate. After all, when a pimply little going to work out. ally first stumbled upon by Karl white guy walking through HUB is Chris Boutet Iremember someone once said to Marx? It's true! Put that in your wearing a Georges Laraque jersey, me that Cheez Whiz was one ingre- Political Science paper for a guar- what does that rea//y mean? dient away from plastic. Which I anteed nine. And let’s say, by chance, that Ah, the last-minute article: a true suppose is a lot like saying that So, what all-encompassing con- Georges Laraque happens to be in testament to the free-spirited and cotton candy is two steps away nection exists between celery, con- HUB at same time, munching on unconstrained atmophere of a stu- from fiberglass. Stupid, in other sumerism, abortion, Barbie dolls, a hot dog from New York Fries. dent newpaper. Or something like words. But not stupid enough to go toast, and Karl Marx? Pfft. Id unno, He sees a complete stranger wear- Marx: apparently, he invented toast. that. Truth be told, I had to work in this article! Bam! Which brings you tell me. I’m going to Vancouver ing his jersey. I think both of them really late last night at my great thought the greatest snack food in me to my next point: for five days. would feel a little bit awkward. waitering job, and I haven't had a the entire world was a celery stalk Of course, jerseys with names lot of time to work something out loaded with peanut butter and dec- Abortion Dave Alexander's on their back started as a rea- that would be all “good” or what- orated with raisins—the prover- Bet you didn't see that smooth sonable trend. The first names have-you. bial “ants” on the “log,” if you will. fucking transition coming, huh? Top TEN that appeared (Gretzky, Lemieux So instead, I thought I would see Oh wait—that's exactly what they Anyhow: abortion. Apparently and Howe) were of players so how far I could get by attempting to were called. Man, there’s nothing people are against the idea of kill- Unpopular Crayon much larger than life that it’s understandable that they could be draw connections between seem- proverbial about that! Ha ha! Ah, ing babies. Conversely, there are colours ingly unrelated things. well, I'm leaving that it in anyway. those who feel a woman's body is treated as idols. Man, if that introduction didn't her own. So who's right? Let's ask But when you start to idolize fourth-line journeymen like Mariusz make you want to stop reading and Consumerism Barbie and the Rockers to find out! bea Throbbing Purple. go see how our wonderful Pandas What I never understood, how- I Can’t Believe it’s not Czerkawski or Kelly Buchberger, are doing at whatever the heil they ever, are people who employed Barbie and the Rockers Beige. you‘ve got problems. Just ask your do, then I just don’t know what will. this same celery-dressing tech- Actually, let's not. They are, after Colostomy Brown. girlfriend, if you have one. She’s probably having difficulty writing You people are simply incorrigi- nique but with Cheez Whiz in lieu all, just dolls. And lame ones at &2N S Massive-Head-Wound ble. of peanut butter. Now, I don’t know that! What was with those quasi- Scarlet. this off as part of being a hardcore Oh well, I just want to make sure about you, but I’ve always made it Keyboards that look like guitars Jaundice. fan. I know I am. you guys know: it’s your own fault a rule to not eat foods that have anyway? Anyone who plays one of Wo I-Can’t-Believe-She- MIKE WINTERS for reading from here on in, okay? a clearly misspelled dairy product those things can't be smart. Man, Dumped-Me Blue. Okay. on the label. what were we thinking? 4 }-Can’t-Believe-She’s- Let's roll! Imean, come on: would you eat at Let's go make some toast and Dating-Someone-Else-Now The Burlap Sack is a semi-reg- a burger place that advertised "100 wait for this nightmare to end. Green. ular feature where, a person or Celery ’ per cent pure Beaph™ patties”? 3 Not Quite White. group who needs to be put in a sack Celery is the vegetable of kings No, you wouldn't. Nor, I assume, Toast 2 Hey-Kid,-Stick-This-in-Your- and beaten, is ridiculed in print. No and preschoolers who smell like would eat Pohrk. Delicious, brown and easy to Ear Grey. sack beatings are actually adminis- old sandwiches alike. I seem to But look at you, with an arm make. Not unlike the stately celery 1 Discharge. tered. recall a period in my life where I stuffed into that Cheez-Whiz jar stalk, this staple of people who u’re ready, we’ve got lace for you you're seeking a rewarding career, build your future with s at Public Works and Government Services Canada delivers newspapers (PWGSC). For more information pick up our recruitment i: package at your campus Career and Employment Centre, or visit us at pwgsc.gc.ca. Employment equity is a priority at PWGSC. = = » ps 2) iat Ko ja=e) 3 w S) (ooy) = Ze) can too aa 5mw oS. © Als oO = = a@ i THE GATEWAY ® W f“,,S,rssUUU a}p}ejDuj p aeuluiaNa4»uhn) y g Quuannde v ous sperlez aprcét, eno us apuroonsu r vous n= @= wants you = a>) a apSa a Si vous 6tes a la recherche d’une carriére enrichissante, @ Dy a= =O~o pourquoi ne pas batir votre avenir avec Travaux publics et oy Tcoe) Services gouvernementaux Canada? Pour en savoir ‘@Ri 25% davantage, demandez notre trousse de recrutement au © + = 2y Service de placement de votre campus ou encore Q fa) rendez-vous au tpsgc.ge.ca. L’équité en matiére ss co} [o) d’emploi est une priorité pour TPSGC. oOo Ps a 2). DE oO (&eSt.i Canada (=oe.) Bee Public Works and Travaux publics et “S““aa3rAW,SSyiIN2F-n 3U}|L 09Eo9| Up eYA6Y d] ) Govemment Servicas Servioas gouvernementaux io) Canada Canada 8 Tue Gareway ADVERTISEMENT 5 Thursday, 25 January, 2001 DANCE es A concert of dance works ‘ by Orchesis members and faculty With guest choreographer LYNNE WIMMER: January 26 and 27, 8PM ~ Myer Horowitz Theatre, University of Alberta $10 advance / $12 at door Lie 492-0770 / 492-3615 MOUNTS CERTIFICATES Tuition and Education Amounts Certificates (T2202As) for the 2000 tax year will be mailed to your current mailing address on February 27. If you have a new mailing address, please ensure that you inform our office no later than February 13. | If you do not receive the form in the mail by March 12, please | * inform our office of your correct address; and * request a duplicate form. Requests for duplicate forms must be made * in person (Student Access Centre, main floor of the Administration Building); or * in writing and must include your name, signature, and student ID. Faxes are acceptable. Telephone requests and E-mail will not be accepted. Note: In compliance with the Freedom of Information and Protection of Privacy Act (FOIPP), forms cannot be issued at the request of third parties, including parents or tax accountants. Office of the Registrar and Student Awards Administration Building : SPORTS [email protected] Thursday, 25 January, 2004 THE GATEWAY Pandas to take on Birds in season finale Sports in Brief Johanna Green SPORTS STAFF The Pandas volleyball team hosts the University of Winnipeg this With the weekend quickly weekend in conference play. The approaching, the U of A Pandas hockey team has its sights firmly Pandas are ranked tenth nationally fixed on taking down one more and fourth in Canada West. Both games will be played in the Main opponent and closing their regular season with a final showing of the Gym. dominant play that has been their ee- e trademark this year. Bears hockey Playing their farewell games on home ice against the UBC The Bears volleyball squad plays Thunderbirds, it is a perfect oppor- Winnipeg in the Main Gym this tunity for the Pandas to build weekend. The Bears, ranked fifth, momentum and gain confidence are hoping for two home wins for the all-important Canada West agathie einghtsh-rtank ed Winnipeg play-offs, the first major test on the team. road to re-claiming their National — or title. Pandas hockey “UBC is a hard-working, physi- cal and defensive team with little The Pandas hockey team hosts the offensive punch,” said Alberta head UBC T-Birds this weekend at the coach Howie Draper. Clare Drake Arena. Alberta has If their previous meetings with only allowed ten goals against in 14 the Pandas are any indication of conference games this season and what's to come this weekend, the boasts two scorers in the CIAU top- Thunderbirds should be afraid. The ten with Krysty Lorenz and Lori Pandas have a 8-0-1 record play- Shupak. Carl Schreuders / THE GATEWAY ing the T-Birds, with a tie at the Strong goaltending by the Pandas has limited their opponents to ten goals in fourteen games. Canada West tournament finals in Pandas basketball 4997. by any stretch,” explained Draper. especially on the powerplay. Saturday night after the final When the U of A girls took on the "It's important that we see positive “We continue to work on our buzzer goes that we've played our The Pandas basketball team hosts Thunderbirds in BC in November, strides in terms of our finish and offensive attack, both entering the best hockey to date, that will be a the seventh-place Simon Fraser they came home ten goals richer our execution in all areas of the offensive zone and creating scor- tremendous builder for our team University team in the Main Gym. and two wins stronger, leaving ice in preparation for Canada West ing opportunities once in the other as we head down the final stretch,” SFU has one of the stingiest the grounded ‘Birds to contemplate playoffs.” team’s end,” said Draper. Draper said Draper. defenses in the league, though they their single goal defense and two The Pandas will also be relying also predicts that UBC will take Game time is set for 8:00pm on may be tired from a three-series home-ice losses. heavily on their offensive machine their share of penalties. Friday and 6:00pm on Saturday at road stretch. : With the stakes significantly to break through UBC's defense, "If we can tell ourselves on Clare Drake Arena. heightened for the Pandas heading into this weekend's match up, and WHO TO WATCH THIS WEEKEND Bears basketball with home ice to their advantage, The Bears basketball team also the U of A team should be able hosts SFU this weekend. SFU is to mount a repeat showing of coming offa series loss to Winnipeg their performance against UBC in and will be taking on the top-ranked November. Bears. Alberta will be watching We’ve been working hard to contain Simon Fraser’s Jordan Mason, the leading scorer in Canada at improving with each West. weekend we play, so the upcoming series will Bears hockey certainly not be a break for The Bears hockey team travels to the girls by anys tretch. Winnipeg to take on the Manitoba Name: Krysty Lorenz Name: Nicole Chapdelaine Name: Lara Ruppell Bisons in what promises to be a Howie Draper, head coach, Number: 9 Year: 4 Number: 24 Year: 1 Number: 44 Year: 2 Pandas hockey tough series. Both games start Position: Centre Position: Winger Position: Defense at 7:00pm and can be heard live Synopsis: This 5/2” tiger had a bit Synopsis: Chapdelaine has beena Synopsis: Ruppell’s confidence on on CJSR (88.5FM) with play-by- But Draper also recognizes that of a dry spell early in 2001 and was great addition to the team. This the ice has soared this year. She UBC is not a team to be taken play by veteran broadcaster Bob experiencing some post-concussion gritty winger likes to grind it out complements the Pandas’ defen- lightly. Stauffer. symptoms. The team captain found with opponents in the corners and sive core with her solid, tough "We've been working hard at her stride in the Pandas’ second in front of the net. She will be key defensive play in her end, while improving with each weekend we game versus Calgary two weekends in this weekend’s matchup against also picking apart the opponent’s Bears and Pandas track & field play, so the upcoming series will ago and is hungry to produce. the physical T-Birds. defense with her offensive skills. certainly not be abreak for the girls Alberta’s track teams will be guests at the Sled Dog Open in Saskatoon RAY CARRUTH’S SPORTS TRIVIA CHALLENGE this weekend after hosting the Golden Bear Open last. The Bears Collin Gallant are currenlty ranked second in the SPORTS STAFF nation and the Pandas hold down So you think you're smart, eh? For all you “sports’-brained folk, we have a little eighth. treat just fer you. The answers happen to be on the next page so don’t peek. Bears and Pandas wrestling 4 Which New York Ranger was involved. found “not criminally responsible” 4 OJ to 944: “You've got to help me. death and served time for it. refused to show his son’s first NHL The wrestling teams are in Regina for the death of Turk Broda follow- I'm trying to help this girl. She's 7? The hosts of this TSN fishing game. Before the days of the dou- for the Cougar Open on Saturday. ing a fight over a barbecue? been up for three days doing drugs show were arrested by fish and ble-header, they choose instead to They are fresh off a conference 2 This NHL player, the highest- With Sere ait game Officials for taking perch (?) show regional action. Interestingly, dual with Calgary, which they won scoring non-drafted player ever, Name the MLB player Simpson was out of season, causing a national the player was later charged and 28-12. was arrested for indecent expo- referring to. uproar? acquitted of the charge of murder sure after he mowed his lawn while 5 Which NFL all-time great and 8 Which NFL stadium's end-zone involving a Florida drug dealer. Sports quote for the day pantless. Hall of Fame member had his DUI is the mythical burial place of 10 This U of A athlete was charged 3 This NFL star was arrested in charge dismissed after he claimed Teamster president Jimmy Hoffa? with "having the stupids” and sen- “Sports are not an extracurricular a hotel room while in possession to have been the victim of bad 9 This 60's and 70’s NHL jour- tenced to two years in a federal activity. Sports are an academic of “drugs and sex toys.” Clue: clams? neyman’s father was gunned down penitentiary after his coach took ~ discipline.” The arresting officer was the hus- 6 This boxing promoter once pis- by the RCMP after a stand-off at the Fifth Amendment on the ques- band of one of the exotic dancers tol-whipped a former employee to his local CBC affiliate when they tion: "Is he stupid?” — America Sport SPORTS 40 Tae Gareway Thursday, 25 January, 2004 take a leok around| at the Student Travel Show! Everything you need to make your summer travel plans! Monday, January 29” 10 am to 3 pm Main Floor, SUB U ofA . Marcus Bence / THE GATEWAY 72 TRAVEL CUTS A third-place finish at last weekend’s Canada West finals at UBC are hopefully a precursor to Nationals. Alberta swimmers hope to duplicate bronze finish SUB, U of A 492-2592 Barrie Tanner The Bears finished third on the third-place overall. Owned and operated by the Canadian Federation of Students SPORTS EDITOR night with a bronze-medal win by "This has been a season of ww w 1 racy elie utes the freestyle relay event. change and the team _ has The University of Alberta swim On the second night, Shauna responded quite well, coming Movie Info Line: teams came away from the McNally continued to shine bright together last weekend to be very 433-0728 2000/2004 Canada West and swam her way to another competitive,” said head swimming Championships last weekend with bronze in the women’s 200m back- coach Deb Sigaty. “Their perfor- GARNEAU an impressive third-place finish, stroke. mance this season has been very and if all goes well, this will encouraging.” This has been a season of only be a preview performance of The team is now looking ahead Shadow of the Vampire Nationals. change and the team has to the national competition, taking Nightly @ 7pm & 9pm Sat & Sun matinee@ 2 pm The Canada West competition, responded quite well ... their place on 23 to 25 February. Both (14A) hosted by UBC this year, was dom- teams will be attempting to dupli- performance this season has inated by the powerful UBC and cate their finishes from the Canada been very encouraging. University of Calgary teams, yet West championships. Alberta's victory showed a marked As for their competition, UBC and — Deb Sigaty, head coach, improvement over that of previous Calgary remain the strongholds. A Sinfully Delicious Comic Fable U of A swimming Where One Taste Is All It Takes. years. “Both of these teams have incred- Aes sn Aad We The Pandas started strong with The Alberta teams collected ible depth,” explained Sigaty. “They jlictteB INOCHE gaDEtNC H Alfred Lena Shauna McNally's bronze-medal more hardware on the third and will have key swims from the veter- | CMOUNoA o= OLIN ks performance and the- freestyle last day of the event with a silver ans [including some Olympic team Chocolat relay team’s silver-medal upset of for McNally and a bronze from members] and have been getting Nightly @ 7pm & 9:30pm Sat & Sun matinee@ 2 pm A MEN1 19 FROMP eD ORECTOR OFT HEC IDER MOUSE RULES” the Dinos. The night ended with Brian Edey in the 100m freestyle strong performances form their (PG suggestive scenes) =i} the Pandas in second place. event, and both teams finished in rookies.” SPORTS COMMENTARY The Magnificent One returns: buckle up! JACK NICHOLSON DETECTIVE JERRY BLACK HAS MADE A PROMISE HE CAN'T BREAK, The Pledge Tain McCletchie Gretzky's season records with rel- in 1983, and was cursing heartily TO CATCH A KILLER TTHEH,E . PLEDGE Nightly@ 7pm & 9:30pm HE CAN'T FIND. THE MARTLET ative ease. a couple of days ago when I real- Sat & Sun Matinee 2:15pm This is the guy who scored for ized that I’d thrown out my (14A) on a “the cycle” against New Jersey on Lemieux scrapbook, filled with (CUP) — Mario “Le Magnifique” New Year's Eve, 1988: on a power clippings from various newspapers ¢| Lemieux has returned to hockey. play, shorthanded, even strength, and hockey magazines. Oh yeah. Let the games begin. on a penalty shot and into an empty You can bet your tuition that Forget all the implications this net. I watched his first game (back brings regarding Lemieux being an This is the guy who scored while against the Leafs on 27 December) owner and whether he will be able flat on his back against the old with a box of tissue and a pile to vote as a member of the NHL Minnesota North Stars. This is the of childhood memories. Of course, Players Association. Forget about guy who went shelf on the Soviets to the big guy returned in style, set- whether he returned in order to win the 1987 Canada Cup, arguably ting up Jagr 32 seconds into the raise the value of the Pittsburgh the last great moment in Canadian first period and finishing with three Penguins franchise or if he hockey. This is the guy who won points. Ah yes, life was splendid at returned in order to keep Jaromir the Art Ross after being diagnosed that moment. Jagr happy. Forget about how he'll and treated for Hodgkin's Disease Mario Lemieux has brought back pay himself, and forget about his (lymphatic cancer) and a bollixed the excitement that hockey has age. back. been desperate for. And for that This is Mario Lemieux, arguably Lemieux, Jagr, Alexei Kovalev, reason alone, we'll keep watching the most physically talented player Robert Lang, and Martin Straka him in ecstasy. ever to lace up a pair of skates. are all bonafide gunners, and thus Or at least I will. For the 12 seasons he played NHL the Penguins will have to live and Quiz answers hockey the guy was skill and grace die by the old “the best defence is a personified. And when he retired in good offence” axiom. 1997 (as prematurely as a 14-year- So, while they'll be bloody fun 4 Ron Greschiner old boy), he took along with him to watch, they may not get too 2 Dino Cicerelli his third Art Ross trophy as the far in Lord Stanley's playoffs, 3 Michael Irving a league's scoring champion. where tight checking and good 4 Pedro Gurrero His best season was 1988-89, defence win. That said, the point is 5 Lawrence Taylor when he scored 499 points in 76 that Lemieux’s return is great for 6 Don King (of course ... ) contests—2.62 points per game! hockey. 7 We don't know the show. But it Lemieux played with Dan Quinn The league needs a huge super- happened. and Wendell Young that year, two of star. Gretzky's gone, Lindros is 8 The Meadowlands, NJ (By the the biggest nobodies in the Wales done, and Messier is out of mira- way, that's two Giants ques- Conference. cles. Mario's return has brought a tions—good luck on Sunday). If Mario had been given some buzz that hasn‘t been heard in a 9 Brian “Spinner” Spencer LOS (ae igs l talent on his wings instead of a long time. 40 We don't have the Fifth carrot and two sticks of celery, I've stood by the Pens ever since Amendment here, stupid. he would have shattered all of they picked Lemieux first overall