ISBN 978-3-468-44116-5 4444111166 TThhee DDaattiinngg GGaammee..iinndddd 11 0099..0022..22000099 1144::2266::2233 UUhhrr Langenscheidt The Dating Game by Carole Eilertson 4444111166__ss000011__116600..iinndddd 11 2277..0022..22000099 88::4433::1166 UUhhrr Übungen: Carole Eilertson Muttersprachliche Durchsicht: Duane Eilertson Lektorat: Gabriele Dietz Layout: Ute Weber Coverfoto: Getty Images For Nicole – Ad augusta per angusta www.langenscheidt.de © 2009 by Langenscheidt KG, Berlin und München ISBN 978-3-468-69415-8 4444111166__ss000011__116600..iinndddd 22 2277..0022..22000099 88::4433::1166 UUhhrr One Ruby’s diary Career women over 30 have a higher chance of being struck dead by lightning than of finding a soul mate. My flatmate Chloe mentioned this surprising fact to me. I’m single and my thirtieth birthday is just three short months away. Wild horses wouldn’t have dragged me to an online dating site twelve months ago. But last night Chloe put things in per- spective. She told me I had no choice – a lot was at stake. I had been single too long and I was so busy with work that I had no time to go out in the evenings and meet people in their normal social habitats. Is virtual reality the only place for me to find my future soul mate, whoever he is and wherever he may be? “So why don’t you give Loveboat a try? It’s the coolest online dating agency in Europe.” Chloe, a petite woman in her early thirties with brun ette shoulder-length hair now elegantly twisted up into a French knot gave me a nudge. It was Wednesday evening. We were sitting in the freshly painted living room of our bijou flat in leafy Maida Vale surrounded by an eclectic variety of furniture that Chloe had bought up cheaply over to be struck dead by lightning [bi(cid:2) str(cid:3)k (cid:4)ded bai (cid:6)laitniŋ] vom Blitz erschlagen werden soul mate [(cid:6)səυl meit] Seelenverwandter to be at stake [bi(cid:2) ət (cid:6)steik] auf dem Spiel stehen social habitat [(cid:4)səυʃl (cid:6)h(cid:11)bit(cid:11)t] sozialer Lebensraum petite [pə(cid:6)ti(cid:2)t] zierlich twisted up [(cid:4)twistid (cid:6)(cid:3)p] hochgesteckt nudge [n(cid:3)d(cid:12)] Stups bijou flat [(cid:6)bi(cid:2)(cid:12)u(cid:2) (cid:4)fl(cid:11)t] kleine elegante Wohnung leafy [(cid:6)li(cid:2)fi] grün eclectic [i(cid:6)klektik] bunt zusammengewürfelt 3 4444111166__ss000011__116600..iinndddd 33 2277..0022..22000099 88::4433::1166 UUhhrr the years at flea markets in and around London. She loved nothing more than acquiring dirt-cheap items that had been unc eremoniously abandoned by their unimaginative owners. Dilapidated wooden tables, desks and chairs were among her favourites. With boundless energy, she then went on to strip them down, repaint and ‘distress’ them. This gave them the fashionable look experts call ‘shabby chic’. The two of us were perched atop two of her recent D.I.Y. products – a pair of matching Victorian-style chairs that she had first covered with layers of progressively greener paints and then sanded down, so that the soft sour cream base coat shimmered through. “So what do you think, Ruby? Why don’t I take a photo of you and we can sign you up for Loveboat? We can have your picture uploaded to your profile in a jiffy.” No sooner said than done! She whipped her mobile phone out of her second-hand, banana-coloured Gucci handbag (in matters of fashion as well as furniture, Chloe didn’t believe in spending a lot of money unnecessarily) and pointed the device threateningly towards me. I tried to protest, but it was too late. Minutes later, thanks to wireless transmission, an image of my face graced the com- puter screen. I must admit I didn’t look too bad. I have a fairly oval face and long curly reddish-brown hair and nut dirt-cheap [(cid:6)d(cid:13)(cid:2)ttʃi(cid:2)p] spottbillig dilapidated [di(cid:6)l(cid:11)pideitid] rampo- niert boundless [(cid:6)baυndləs] grenzenlos to strip sth. down [(cid:4)strip / (cid:6)daυn] etw. abbeizen to distress sth. [di(cid:6)stres] etw. malträtieren to perch [p(cid:13)(cid:2)tʃ] hocken D.I.Y. (= Do It Yourself) products [(cid:4)di(cid:2)ai(cid:6)wai] selbst gebaute Sachen base coat [(cid:6)beis kəυt] Grundan- strich in a jiffy [in ə (cid:6)d(cid:12)ifi] im Handumdrehen device [di(cid:6)vais] Gerät to grace sth. [(cid:14)reis] etw. zieren 4 4444111166__ss000011__116600..iinndddd 44 2277..0022..22000099 88::4433::1166 UUhhrr brown eyes. Okay, my lips were pouted a tad too sceptically, but overall the effect was quite pleasing. “You look gorgeous. I love those lobster-red leggings of yours. Can I borrow them some time?” “Sure, feel free!” Chloe put down her mobile back in her bag, looked at me and sighed. “I, for one, would fall in love with you at the drop of a hat. Shame you’re straight!” I grinned and put my hand under my chin feigning coyness. “Ooh, Chloe, you’re tempting me. But okay, so I’m not gay! Well, nobody’s perfect!” We both started to giggle and when I had recovered, I looked at my photo on the screen again. “I like the photo, Chloe, but I’m not sure I want to post it online. What if one of my clients saw it? It would be embarrassing.” I am a solicitor and I deal with sober-minded business c lients in many different branches. The last thing I wanted was for one of these ultra-conservative ‘suits’ to go wading through intimate details of my private life. Chloe nodded seriously. “Point taken. In my line of busi- ness that kind of thing is not ... uhm ... exactly paramount, but with you things are a bit different.” Chloe was a television host and producer. In the media nobody cared about privacy, or so it seemed to me. to pout [paυt] einen Schmollmund machen tad [t(cid:11)d] eine Spur straight [streit] heterosexuell to feign sth. [fein] etw. vortäuschen coyness [(cid:6)kɔinəs] Schüchternheit to tempt sb. [temt] in Versuchung führen to giggle [(cid:6)(cid:14)i(cid:14)l] kichern solicitor [sə(cid:6)lisitə] Anwältin to wade through sth. [(cid:4)weid (cid:6)θru(cid:2)] sich durch etw. durchwühlen paramount [(cid:6)p(cid:11)rəmaυnt] an erster Stelle television host [(cid:6)telivi(cid:12)n (cid:4)həυst] Fern- sehmoderatorin 5 4444111166__ss000011__116600..iinndddd 55 2277..0022..22000099 88::4433::1177 UUhhrr “All right, but even without putting my picture online, I’ve still got a funny feeling about computer dating.” Chloe, who was already calling up the registration form, sniggered. “Ruby, you must be the only single woman below thirty in London who has never met anyone online in her life, and of course I blame your mother.” I laughed dryly. “You’re right. No wonder I’m wary. Charlie is really an extreme example of Internet dating gone crazy!” Exercise 1: Underline the appropriate words or phrases. 1. Ruby is a successful (career woman/Internet dater). 2. Her flatmate (wants to try/wants her to try) Internet dating. 3. She lives in a (large/small) flat in London. 4. Chloe enjoys distressing (Ruby/furniture). 5. Ruby is wary of (Internet dating/gay women). 6. For Ruby (being photographed/privacy) is paramount. The registration form appeared and Chloe handed me the computer mouse. “There you go, it’s all yours! And speaking as a veteran online dater myself, I must admit that I feel like a complete novice when your mother tells her tales.” My 60-year-old mother Charlie, a doyen of cyber-dating, has gone through four marriages and four divorces but she remains an eternal optimist. Chloe, no beginner herself, was connected up with an amazing network of friends and potential lovers via a gay dating site. “My mother doesn’t seem to need a permanent relationship. She changes boyfriends like other women change their hair to snigger [(cid:6)sni(cid:14)ə] kichern wary [(cid:6)weəri] argwöhnisch novice [(cid:6)nɒvis] Neuling doyen [(cid:6)dɔiən] Meisterin 6 4444111166__ss000011__116600..iinndddd 66 2277..0022..22000099 88::4433::1177 UUhhrr colour. Sometimes I think Internet dating was invented just for her. I can understand that she wants a bit of excitement in her life but I ...” I hesitated. As usual Chloe could read my thoughts. “You still think you can find your soul mate, don’t you?” I fidgeted with the computer mouse. “Suppose so. Don’t you believe there’s such a thing, Chloe?” Chloe’s eyes darkened for a moment. “I did once, but ...” I winced. When I had first moved in with Chloe 12 months ago, her beloved girlfriend Sybil had just dumped her. That was at about the same time Rick had left me too. Misery loves company and we had both tried our best to console each other. Since then, I have been very reluctant to date. But Chloe being Chloe didn’t mope around for long. Within a week of being dumped, she was surfing the Internet, visiting every gay dating website she could find. Perhaps Internet dating really was the way to go, but something inside me rebelled against using the same methods to choose a package holiday as to select a future lover. I shivered, even though the temperature in the room was pleasant; after all it was the end of a hot day in late summer. London doesn’t really deserve its reputation as the fog capital of Europe. “Chloe, online dating feels unreal to me. It’s unnatural. It feels ... It feels so artificial. See!” I pointed to the screen. We feasted our eyes upon a nostalgic image of a Mississippi to fidget with sth. [(cid:6)fid(cid:12)it wið] mit etw. herumspielen to wince [wins] zusammenzucken to dump sb. [d(cid:3)mp] mit jdm. Schluss machen to console sb. [kən(cid:6)səυl] jdn. trösten to mope around [(cid:4)məυp ə(cid:6)raυnd] mit einer Jammermiene herumlaufen to feast one’s eyes upon sth. [(cid:4)fi(cid:2)st w(cid:3)nz (cid:6)aiz ə(cid:4)pɒn] sich an etw. weiden 7 4444111166__ss000011__116600..iinndddd 77 2277..0022..22000099 88::4433::1177 UUhhrr steamship sailing into the sunset with the logo Loveboat pasted in below it in spidery fonts. “Loveboat! For good- ness sake, doesn’t that name make you think of a Doris Day movie from the forties?” Chloe and I were cineasts. We attended a film club every Tuesday and were into 20th century cinema and art-house movies. “Anyway – what’s wrong with meeting men the normal way?” Chloe screwed up her sea-green eyes and looked at me de spairingly. She opened her handbag again, slid out a packet of cigarettes and offered me one. “The same thing that’s wrong with meeting gay women the normal way!” I refused the cigarette. “No thanks,” I said smugly. Chloe lit up, and I looked on enviously. I had managed to give up smoking ‘for good’ just six weeks ago! Chloe puffed on her cigarette artistically, sending up wisps of delicate smoke around her face. It formed a circle which hovered for a moment, halo-like, above her head. Somehow she always managed to look angelic even when indulging in her favourite vice. I thought about my mother, a chain-smoker too, and her incredible turnover of ‘boyfriends’. Charlie was always fussing about the details of clothes and make-up and asking me questions like: “Does my bottom look big in these slacks? Do you think this shade of maroon eye-shadow pasted in [(cid:4)peistid (cid:6)in] eingeklebt to screw up one’s eyes [skru(cid:2) (cid:4)(cid:3)p w(cid:3)nz (cid:6)aiz] die Augen zusammenkneifen to slide out sth. [(cid:4)slaid (cid:6)aυt] etw. herausziehen smugly [(cid:6)sm(cid:3)(cid:14)li] selbstgefällig wisp [wisp] Rauchwölkchen halo-like [(cid:6)heiləυlaik] wie ein Heiligenschein to fuss about sth. [(cid:6)f(cid:3)s ə(cid:4)baυt] viel Aufhebens um etw. machen slacks [sl(cid:11)ks] Hose peistid 8 4444111166__ss000011__116600..iinndddd 88 2277..0022..22000099 88::4433::1177 UUhhrr makes me look younger?” Did I really want to put myself through an ordeal like that – always checking the mirror and checking out the latest fashions? I glanced at my clothes. I was dressed in blue jeans and a baggy white T-shirt. During working hours I always had to ‘dress up’ in smart business suits. But in my spare time I was only too happy to hang up my corporate armour and slip into something casual and comfortable. Lost in thought, I was barely listening to Chloe who, goaded by the nicotine, had launched enthusiastically into a plea for Internet dating. “Ruby! Wake up! You are living in the 21st century in case nobody has bothered telling you. This is not The Flintstones! These days everybody meets everyone online. Today online dating is the normal way! Let’s be realistic. Do you h onestly believe you can meet the woman – sorry, man of your dreams just by chance? What is the probabil- ity of that h appening, eh? Think about it. Do you serious- ly believe you will meet Prince Charming at a nightclub? Wake up and smell the c offee, Ruby. It simply isn’t going to happen!” She took another vigorous puff on the cigarette and looked at me challengingly before continuing her plea. “I think you look at life too romantically.” She hesitated for a moment, then her voice took on a bitter tone. “Who are we kidding, Ruby? How can anybody expect to find an ideal partner these days? I am happy to settle for a good night out, a good laugh and good sex! Soul mate indeed! And I thought you solicitors were a hard-nosed bunch!” ordeal [ɔ(cid:2)(cid:6)di(cid:2)l] Martyrium suit [su(cid:2)t] Kostüm corporate armour [(cid:4)kɔ(cid:2)pərət (cid:6)ɑ(cid:2)mə] steife Businesskleidung goaded [(cid:6)(cid:14)əυdid] aufge- kratzt plea [pli(cid:2)] Plädoyer hard-nosed [(cid:6)hɑ(cid:2)d(cid:4)nəυzd] nüchtern 9 4444111166__ss000011__116600..iinndddd 99 2277..0022..22000099 88::4433::1177 UUhhrr