Visit IGNTD.com/Recovery for information about IGNTD Recovery programs, workshops, and events, and to join the IGNTD community. To invite Dr. Jaffe to speak, please email [email protected] For additional information or questions contact [email protected] THE ABSTINENCE MYTH. Copyright © 2018 Adi Jaffe. All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced in any manner whatsoever without written permission except for brief excerpts in compliance with copyright laws. Published by IGNTD Press, Los Angeles, CA, USA Editorial development by Janet Goldstein First edition 2018 Print ISBN: 978-1-73223-940-1 eBook ISBN: 978-1-73223-941-8 To my parents, for being there when I needed them the most, my sister for putting up with the wreckage I’d caused for so long, and my wife and children for serving as the torch that lights up my days and nights. “Hope is the foundational quality of all change.” —Alfred Adler, psychologist CONTENTS PRAISE FOR DR. ADI JAFFE AND THE IGNTD RECOVERY METHOD 1. WHAT I KNOW: My Story The Current Recovery “System” Isn’t Working The IGNTD Recovery Method—Starting Where You Are and Where You Want to Go EXERCISE: Your Transformation Objective 2. THE MYTHOLOGY OF ADDICTION “From Party Girl to Lost Mom... to a Way Out” (Terry’s Story) The Wider Lesson—Getting to the Tender, Hidden Spots EXERCISE: Starting Your Journey 3. THE POWER OF STORIES The Pygmalion Effect How Confirmation Bias Tricks Us EXERCISE: Identifying the Roles You Play 4. THE POWER OF EXPLANATIONS The False “Cure” for Addiction The Limits of Explanations The Four Addiction “Camps”: The State of Our Explanations Joining Together: Why We Need to Embrace All the Explanations People Are Not Fixed—Nor Is Addiction The Myth of Sustained Abstinence as a Cure EXERCISE: Exploring the Explanations That Fit YOU 5. A NEW MODEL OF RECOVERY Searching for a Recovery Path That Fits Truth Is a Catalyst Challenging the Barriers to Treatment A New Entry Point for Recovery “A Successful Life Cast with a Dark Shadow”—Julia’s Story The IGNTD Principles The Process of IGNTD Recovery EXERCISE: Simple Steps to Start Your Recovery AFTERWORD ACKNOWLEDGMENTS NOTES ABOUT THE AUTHOR Praise for Dr. Adi Jaffe and the IGNTD Recovery Method Starting Where You Are and Where You Want to Go “A fresh and much needed perspective. Through his methodical research and personal life experience, Dr. Jaffe exposes some of the most dangerous myths in the recovery movement. This book is not only educational and eye opening, it is transformational for anyone struggling with addiction. Thank you Dr. Jaffe.” —Annie Grace, author of This Naked Mind “Dr. Jaffe cuts through the mythology that engulfs addiction and presents us with scientifically backed ideas to help resolve this growing problem. This book is an absolute must-read for anyone who is struggling or trying to help someone and wants real solutions that are not based on hand-me-down wisdom.” —Andy Ramage, author of The 28 Day Alcohol-Free Challenge “ I cannot speak highly enough about the [IGNTD] work. I could probably write a book on just how much your methods have changed my life.” —IGNTD Recovery Online Course participant “Dr. Jaffe, thank you for the most amazing experience that has changed my life forever, and for publicly sharing the story of your personal struggles... [It] gave me hope and confidence that I could change my behavior. I am excited for my future.” —Workshop participant, Savannah, GA “I feel so lucky to have found the IGNTD Recovery. It has been such an amazing mind shift to see that as my whole life improves my problems with substances also improve.” —IGNTD Recovery Online Course participant “Having Dr. Jaffe’s help to get to the bottom of the problem and to dig deeper than just the substance abuse was tremendously helpful. Adi is a very positive person who helped transform my life in many ways besides helping with my substance abuse issues.” —client, AM, Denver, CO “What a relief to find IGNTD! I’ve tried other treatments for years but always hit a wall. If I questioned the program, I was told that I wasn’t trying hard enough. It never felt like a good fit. It’s great to be heard.” —IGNTD Recovery Online Course participant