Irma Thoen ty So S Identi lidari olid d ty a n a r arity a Irma Thoen is a cultural historian who received her doctorate from nd Ide ity a d n n Soli the European University Institute in Florence, Italy. tity d I d e n t S it y ‘The first gift is the womb of the second’, notes Johan de Brune, the t r author of a seventeenth-century Dutch emblem book. This quote re- a t flects the notion that, contrary to modern day people, seventeenth- e century individuals did not feel uneasy about stressing the reciprocal g i character of their gift exchanges. We perceive ‘them’ as selfish beings c who only exchange gifts for personal gain, while ‘we’ only give gifts A altruistically and from the kindness of our hearts. Is this a fair assump- f tion? And what does this assumption reveal about us? f e In Strategic Affection? Irma Thoen uses gift exchange practices as a c t way to analyse the nature of early-modern social relations. The prac- i o tices of exchange, the meanings of gifts and the cultural conventions n that inform the exchange of gifts in seventeenth-century Holland are ? discussed and compared to the social practice of gift exchange in Holland today. Thoen’s analysis makes the men and women in her story come to life and allows the reader to enter their lives, their strug- gles for friendship, honour and survival, their fears, beliefs and feelings T of relief. h o e n Strategic Affection? ISBN-13 978 90 5356 811 8 ISBN-10 90 5356 811 5 Gift Exchange in Seventeenth-Century Holland www.aup.nl A         ฀ U          ฀ P     A         ฀ U          ฀ P     aup_thoen.indd฀฀฀1 11-12-2006฀฀฀13:47:44 StrategicAffection? SOLIDARITYAND IDENTITY Recentsocial,culturalandeconomicdevelopmentsinWesternso- ciety are at the basis of increasing cultural and ethnic diversity. People’ssocialandculturalidentititiesarebecomingmorevaried. What are the consequences of these developments for social bonds and solidarity? Finding answers to this question is the aim oftheseriesSolidarityandIdentity. editors ofthe series Prof. dr. A.E. Komter, Faculty of Social and Behavioural Sciences, UtrechtUniversity Prof. dr. J. Burgers, Faculty of Social Sciences, Erasmus University Rotterdam Prof.J.C.Rath,InstituteforMigrationandEthnicStudies,Universityof Amsterdam previously published Minghuan Li, We Need Two Worlds: Chinese Immigrant Associations in a WesternSociety,1999(isbn9789053564028) Aafke E.Komter,JackBurgers andGodfriedEngbersen,Hetcementvan desamenleving:eenverkennendestudienaarsolidariteitencohesie,2000/ 20042(isbn9789053564370) Clementine van Eck, Purified by Blood: Honour Killings amongst Turks in theNetherlands,2002(isbn9789053564912) Joanne van der Leun, Looking for Loopholes: Processes of Incorporation of IllegalImmigrantsintheNetherlands,2003(isbn9789053566008) Marc Hooghe, Sociaal kapitaal in Vlaanderen: verenigingen en democratischepolitiekecultuur,2003(isbn9789053566435) AafkeE.Komter,Solidariteitendegift:socialebandenensocialeuitsluiting, 2003(isbn9789053566459) Marco van der Land, Vluchtige verbondenheid: stedelijke bindingen van de Rotterdamsenieuwemiddenklasse,2004(isbn9789053566787) Frank J. Buijs, Froukje Demant and Atef Hamdy, Strijders van eigen bodem: radicale en democratische moslims in Nederland, 2006 (isbn 9789053569160) Strategic Affection? Gift Exchange in Seventeenth-Century Holland Irma Thoen Thepublicationofthisbookhasbeenmadepossiblebydonations from the European University Institute, the J.E. Jurriaanse Stich- ting, Stichting Dr. Hendrik Muller’s Vaderlandsch Fonds, and the M.A.O.C.GravinvanBylandtStichting. Coverillustration:DirckHals,APartyatTable(1626),The NationalGallery,London Coverdesign:SabineMannel,neongrafischevormgeving,Am- sterdam Layout:japes,Amsterdam isbn-13 9789053568118 isbn-10 9053568115 nur 757 ©AmsterdamUniversityPress,Amsterdam2007 Allrightsreserved.Withoutlimitingtherightsundercopyrightreservedabove, nopartofthisbookmaybereproduced,storedinorintroducedintoaretrieval system,ortransmitted,inanyformorbyanymeans(electronic,mechanical, photocopying,recordingorotherwise)withoutthewrittenpermissionofboth thecopyrightownerandtheauthorofthebook. Table of Contents Acknowledgements 7 Introduction 9 DefiningtheGift 11 GiftsinTheory 13 SourcesandMethodology 24 PartI:PracticesofGiftExchange 45 DailyHospitality 45 HospitalityatCalendarFeasts 58 HospitalityandRitesofPassage 73 OtherGifts 82 NetworksofExchange 91 Conclusion 95 PartII:GiftsandMeanings 97 A.RitesofPassage 97 MarriageandCookingPots 98 BirthandChristeningGifts 116 DeathandSupportthroughPoeticLetters 121 Conclusion 128 B.Hospitality 130 TheOrganisationofHospitality 131 DiscoursesonHospitality 133 HospitalitytowardsProfessionalContacts:Tailorsand WetNurses 137 StadholdersandForcedHospitality 140 HospitalityandReciprocity 147 Conclusion 150 PartIII:TermsandConditionsofExchange 151 BrotherlyExchange 151 FriendlyExchange 164 ProfessionalExchange 173 5 LiteraryExchange 184 Conclusion 194 PartIV:ComparisoninTime 197 PracticesofExchange 199 DiscoursesonExchangeintheLetterstotheFuture 212 CulturalConventions 218 Conclusion 222 Conclusion 223 Notes 231 Sources 269 Literature 271 IndexofSubjects 283 6 Acknowledgements Naturallyaworklikethiscannotbecompletedwithoutthehelpof family, friends and professional contacts. Some of these people havehelpedmethroughtheiracademicknowledgeandcriticalre- marks on my work, some of them have inspired me through the discussions we had, and others were there to support and posi- tively distract me. Although it is impossible to mention all these peoplebyname,thereareafewthatIwishtothankexplicitly. FirstofallIwanttoextendmygratitudetomysupervisor,Peter Becker. Although his field of expertise does not include seven- teenth-century Holland nor gift exchange, he has proved himself willing and able to supervise this book. Secondly, I wish to thank my co-supervisor, Willem Frijhoff. Not only is his knowledge of early-modern Dutch history – and many other things – unsur- passed,theswiftnesswithwhichhereadsandcorrectstextsisun- equalled. Other academic contacts that have helped me throughout the years are Ingrid van der Vlis, who helped me with my database project, and Alexander Geppert, who taught me the advantages of a good bibliographical program. I am also indebted to Professor ArjoKlamerandtheparticipantsofhis‘ValueofCulture’seminar as well as to the participants of Frijhoff’s ‘Cultural History’ semi- nar. AlexandravanDongen,curatorattheBoijmansVanBeuningen Museum,andCoraLaanareresponsibleforintroducingmetothe field of material culture. The Meertens Institute in Amsterdam haswelcomedmetodomyresearchonthe‘LetterstotheFuture’. With Rudolf Dekker I discussed ego-documents in seventeenth- century Holland, and with Jeroen Blaak I discussed the same and many other research issues. I also want to thank Jeroen for his hospitality;hewaskindenoughtosharehisofficewithmewhen- everIwasinHollandforoneofmy‘missions’. Naturally I also want to thank my parents. They have always been very supportive of me, in every way they possibly could. Still the most important gift they have offered me throughout my life 7 is their faith that I can do whatever I set my mind to. I hope this bookisproofthattheywererightaboutmeallalong. Last but conventionally not least, I want to thank Serge for all his practical and mental support. I could have probably written this book without you, but with you it has been so much more funandsomuchmoreinteresting. IrmaThoen September2006 8 Introduction When in 1624 Constantijn Huygens was staying in London with an official delegation, he received a number of letters from Dor- othea van Dorp.1 Dorothea lived next to the Huygens family in The Hagueandhad oncebeenhischildhood sweetheart. In these lettersshenotonlykepthiminformedonthelatestgossipofhigh society in The Hague, but she also urged Huygens on several oc- casions to have Lady Killigrew, a mutual acquaintance, send her a present.2On24MarchDorotheawrote: “IwishladyKilligrewwouldsendmealittlegoldenring.”3 AmonthlatershereceivedanumberofgemstonesfromthisLady Killigrew, for which Dorothea thanked her through the mediation of Huygens. In May, Dorothea sent Lady Killigrew a present; a bracelet made of amber. This gift was presumably also offered upon request, for it was accompanied by a letter to Huygens whichstated: “Iam glad there is something she wishes to have from me. This andeverythingIpossessinthisworldisatherdisposal.Shewill domegreathonourbywearingit,withwhichshewillgreatlyob- ligemeto her.Tell herthat itcomesfromsomeonewhoismore her servant than anyone has ever been, notwithstanding all the peoplethatloveher.”4 These phrases about Lady Killigrew went on for a while, after which Dorothea directed her attentions once more to Huygens himself: “Ibegyou:donotforgetthelittleringshehaspromisedme.”5 ThisbeggingforgiftsseemstosuggestthatDorotheawasarather bad-mannered young girl; it is definitely not a way in which one would expect “a humble servant” to behave. Yet Dorothea van 9