SENIOR STAFF Kelly A. Peterson CEO Mike Hamblin RECRUITMENT Mick Woolsey EDUCATION Nikki MacKay RETENTION Deborah Lindner COMMUNICATIONS Debbie Hofhines DEVELOPMENT BOARD Lisa Watts Baskin CHAIR Erik Ence VICE CHAIR Libby Biittner Alan Blood Cate Boulden Kathy Carter Kathleen Christy Robert Gerlach Landon Hardcastle Lloyd Hardcastle Brenda Hardy Jodi Juretich Lance Rich Katie Rothe Steve Sunday David Webster, Sr Jason White Dr. Doug Goldsmith Consultant to the Board of Directors FOSTERROSTER Darcey Hirst EDITOR PrestoPrint PRINT & FULFILMENT SERVICES 2 utahfostercare.org FosterRoster THINK: KIDS THINK: KIDS THINK: KIDS THINK: KIDS THINK: KIDS THINK: KIDS THINK: KIDS THINK: KIDS Save the Date! | April 20, 2017 Utah Foster Care Annual Symposium: featuring Dr. Stuart Ablon By: Mick Woolsey, Director of Education, UFC J. Stuart Ablon, Ph.D., is the Director of Think: Kids in the Department of Psychiatry at Massachusetts General Hospital. He is also Associate Clinical Professor of Psychology in the Department of Psychiatry at Harvard Medical School. Dr. Ablon co-founded the Center for Collaborative Problem Solving where he also served as Co-Director from its inception until 2008. Dr. Ablon is co-author of Treating Explosive Kids: The Collaborative Problem Solving Approach and author of numerous articles, chapters and scientific papers on the process and outcome of psychosocial interventions. A dynamic and engaging speaker, Dr. Ablon was recently ranked #5 on the list of the world’s top rated keynote speakers in the academic arena. Dr. Ablon’s research has been funded by, amongst others, the National Institute of Health, the American Psychological Association, the American Psychoanalytic Association, the International Psychoanalytic Association, the Mood and Anxiety Disorders Institute, and the Endowment for the Advancement of Psychotherapy. Dr. Ablon received his doctorate in clinical psychology from the University of California at Berkeley and completed his pre-doctoral and post-doctoral training at Massachusetts General Hospital and Harvard Medical School. Dr. Ablon trains parents, educators, and clinicians and consults to schools and treatment programs throughout the world in the Collaborative Problem Solving approach. We are so excited to have Dr. Ablon speak at the UFC Annual Symposium on April 20, 2017. Watch for more info on FACEBOOK and mark your calendars. Collaborative Problem Solving: “Where there’s a skill, there’s a way!" December, 2016 & January, 2017 3 UTAH FOSTER CARE SPLORE OFFICES open for adventure Murray 5296 South Commerce Drive As Winter is upon us, would you and your family like the opportunity to try a Suite 400 new activity? Not sure where to begin? Splore is offering foster families, just Murray, UT 84107 like yours, an opportunity to try something new for a minimal cost! 801-994-5205 Main 801-994-5206 Fax Cost: $10 per individual, $20 for a family of 4 and $5 for each additional family 877-505-5437 Toll-free member. Ogden Includes: lunch, transportation from UFC's Murray office, equipment and 3340 South Harrison Blvd. guide instruction. Suite 200 Ogden, UT 84403 To reserve your spot: contact Splore today and be sure to reference Utah 801-392-1114 Main Foster Care: [email protected] or (801) 484-4128. Orem 274 West Center Street Orem, UT 84057 January 14th: Snowshoe, 9-1pm, East Canyon 801-373-3006 Main Hot Lunch & Hot Chocolate Provided Price 475 West Price River Dr Group Size: 12 Suite 152 Price, UT 84501 Sign up Deadline: 1/9 435-636-0210 Main Roosevelt Rural Route 3, Box 8008 February 11th: XC Skiing, 9-1pm, Mountain Dell Roosevelt, UT 84066 435-724-0959 Main Hot Lunch & Hot Chocolate Provided Vernal Group Size: 12 1052 West Market Dr Vernal, UT 84078 Sign up Deadline: 2/6 435-781-4224 Main Moab 180 South 300 East March 11th: Full Moon Shedding, 5-8pm, TBA Suite C Moab, UT 84532 Dutch Oven Dinner Provided 435-259-3345 Main Group Size: 12 St George 491 East Riverside Dr Sign up Deadline: 3/6 Suite 2B St George, UT 84790 435-656-8065 Main April 15th: Snowshoeing, 9-1pm, Millcreek Canyon Richfield 201 East 500 North Lunch Provided Richfield, UT 84701 435-979-2233 Main Group Size: 12 Sign up Deadline: 4/10 4 utahfostercare.org FosterRoster UTAH FOSTER CARE ( UFC ) Cheers to a New Year! By Marissa Douglas, Retention / Recruitment, UFC Southwest Region UFC Staff Ben Ashcraft “The only way to get started is to quit talking and begin doing.” – Walt Disney AREA REPRESENTATIVE Amy Bates New Year’s resolutions, anyone? I dislike setting myself up for failure, so when RECRUITER it comes to a new year and whether or not you want to describe resolutions as Marissa Douglas a goal, intention, commitment or self-torture, I go easy on myself! I do like to RECRUITER/RETENTION SPECIALIST set goals and track my progress, but most importantly I like to be genuine Cliff Farnsworth about it. Listed below are some ideas to consider if you’re planning new TRAINER resolutions. Denice Becham TRAINER •Be Realistic: Make a goal that you want and can achieve. I know if I say Diane Callister I’ll eat greens with each meal of the day; I find myself hiding under the RETENTION SERVICES SPECIALIST covers the first night guiltily eating M&M’s. I haven’t been truthful about what I’m willing to do! If you want to cut back on eating sweets, start out slow and simple. That may look like foregoing a dessert each night, but, UTAH DIVISION OF CHILD & rewarding yourself with a few M&M’s each day and then a dessert night FAMILY SERVICES ( DCFS ) once a week! DCFS HQ ( 801 ) 538 – 4100 •Cheerleaders: Get your family and friends involved! Let them know what 195 NORTH 1950 WEST, SLC your goals are and keep them in the loop of your progress. It’s easier with a support system in place. My kids are really great at keeping me in line. Southwest Region DCFS Offices When they are aware of what I’m working towards they ask if I NEED TO REACH YOUR RFC? accomplished it, when I’m going to, and sometimes annoy me enough that CALL YOUR LOCAL DCFS OFFICE … I get it done! Sharing out loud, (even on social media) may help in dedicating yourself, and hold you accountable to your goals. Beaver ( 435 ) 438 - 3400 875 NORTH MAIN STREET •Make time: Once you’re committed with a specific goal in mind, set aside Cedar City ( 435 ) 865 - 5600 the time you need to make it happen. Each Sunday, look at the week ahead 106 NORTH 100 EAST and design your schedule; setting time required to continue progression. Manti ( 435 ) 835 - 0780 55 SOUTH MAIN STREET, #24 •Get back up: You are going to have a bad day, week or maybe even an off Panguitch ( 435 ) 676 - 1400 month with your progress. Don’t beat yourself up, none of us are perfect— 665 NORTH MAIN STREET mistakes are allowed. It’s not about you falling down, but that you keep Richfield ( 435 ) 896 - 1250 getting UP! 201 EAST 500 NORTH St George ( 435 ) 652 - 2960 178 NORTH 200 EAST Adoption Celebration FIND MORE RESOURCES ONLINE Katrina Wood paints the faces utahfostercare.org/southwest of happy kids! Amy Bates & daughter, Megan, celebrate adoption. Tifiny Rose speaks about her experiences with adoption. SDoeuctehmwbeesrt, R2e0g1i6o n&  JaDneucaermy, b2e0r1, 72016 & January, 2017 55 Clusters ST. GEORGE CLUSTER ST. GEORGE CLUSTER Family Christmas Party Foster Families Forum Ben Ashcraft, LMFT December 7; 6:00-8:00pm January 18; 6:00-8:00pm WHAT’S A CLUSTER? Staheli Farms Falls Event Center / 170 S. Mall Dr. Clusters are peer groups for foster, adoptive, and kinship families Enjoy some food and fun with other Training will include a panel of foster who meet together on a monthly families out at Staheli Farms. More details parents and teens from foster care. Light basis for support & required to follow. Must RSVP to Diane to attend. dinner will be served. training. Staheli Farms: 3400 S Washington Fields Rd; Washington [email protected] Learn more, online! CEDAR CLUSTER CEDAR CLUSTER CEDAR CITY CLUSTER Family Christmas Party Positive Behavior Intervention Amy ( 435 ) 586 - 7403 Amy Bates, UFC Cluster Facilitator December 7; 5:00-6:30pm January 19; 7:00-9:00pm MANTI CLUSTER Connie ( 435 ) 262-1347 Paiute Tribal Office Gym Festival Hall / 105 N 100 E Enjoy the holiday fun with other foster Come learn how to help young children RICHFIELD CLUSTER families. Bring a dessert or side dish who are exhibiting difficult behaviors. Holly ( 801 ) 360-1967 to share. Please RSVP. Paiute Tribal Office: 440 N. Paiute Dr; Cedar City ST GEORGE CLUSTER KC [email protected] FOUNDATIONS FOR YOUTH FOUNDATIONS FOR YOUTH Class 1 Class 2 Denice Beacham, UFC Denice Beacham, UFC December 6; 5:30-9:30pm December 19; 5:30-9:30pm St. George UFC / 491 E Riverside Dr #2B St. George UFC / 491 E Riverside Dr #2B Introduction and Solution- The Effects of Trauma on Focused Relationships. Adolescent Development. RSVP FOR CLASSES & CLUSTERS! If a class or Cluster is cancelled, moved or rescheduled, we can only alert you if you’ve RSVP'd! Also, if childcare is provided, it can only be offered to those who’ve RSVP’d. Help us help you — RSVP! RSVP: CLIFF FARNSWORTH / ( 435 ) 656-8065 [email protected] 66 uuttaahhffoosstteerrccaarree..oorrgg/southwest « Have questions? Check here, first! FosterRoster RICHFIELD CLUSTER RICHFIELD CLUSTER Family Christmas Party CPR/ First Aid Training Sevier County EMS Staff Date & Time TBA Date & Time TBA Venice LDS Chapel / 170 S. Main St. Sevier County EMS Building Enjoy the holiday fun with other Training will cover basic CPR/ First Aid foster families. Bring a dessert or training needed for foster parents. Sevier side dish to share. Please RSVP County EMS Building; 67 N 400 E, Salina. to Holly ( 801 ) 360-1967. MANTI CLUSTER MANTI CLUSTER Cluster Family Christmas Dinner CPR/ First Aid Training Sevier County EMS Staff December 10; 6:00-8:00pm Date & Time TBA Moroni City Building / 80 S. 200 W. Sevier County EMS Building Enjoy an evening out with family. Training will cover basic CPR/ First Aid RSVP to Connie ( 435 ) 262-1347. training needed for Foster Parents. Sevier We need a count for the food. County EMS Building; 67 N 400 E, Salina. FOUNDATIONS FOR YOUTH FOUNDATIONS FOR YOUTH Class 3 Class 4 Denice Beacham, UFC Denice Beacham, UFC January 10; 5:30-9:30pm January 24; 5:30-9:30pm St. George UFC / 491 E Riverside Dr #2B St. George UFC / 491 E Riverside Dr #2B Introduction to Life Skills Transition to Adult Living Skill Building. Assessment and Learning Plans. Thanks to everyone who came to our St. George Women's Retreat! A great time was had by all. SDoeuctehmwbeesrt, R2e0g1i6o n&  JaDneucaermy, b2e0r1, 72016 & January, 2017 77 Anticipating Holiday Triggers By Cliff Farnsworth, LCSW, Trainer, UFC Wow, it is THAT time of the year, the weather outside is best with consistency and stability. The more you can changing, the days are getting shorter, and anticipation is do to help them know what the plan is the better they in the air. The holiday season is upon us! Holiday is about are likely to respond. Fear of the unknown is a big family gatherings. For many people that is a very happy challenge for them. thought but for others it is not. Whatever your idea is for “The Holiday Season,” the reality is it may be very different •Help children prepare for family gatherings: for children in foster care in your home. Children in care may be overwhelmed by family gatherings. They may be meeting new people for the This time of year is often filled with uncertainty for first time and encounter a fair amount of “chaos”. children who find themselves in foster care for a variety of Have an identified plan for the child so they know reasons. For some, there is a great deal of stress and what to do if they are feeling overwhelmed. It is also anxiety about what is going to happen in their lives. They important to consider how extended family may may be wondering if they will ever go back home and be respond to the children placed in your home. Help with their parents and siblings again. For others they may your family have clear expectations about how to help be wondering if they will ever have a permanent family children enjoy the Holidays. again. For still others it may be as simple as having traumatic memories of what the Holidays were like in their past experiences. Everywhere they look they may see reminders of what was, what is, or what may never come to be. With those thoughts in mind, here are some ideas for how to help them navigate the holidays. •TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF!: You will be no good to anyone else if you are not in a good place. Pay attention to how you are doing so you can be there to help the child out. Clearly identify those things you can do to take better care of yourself. •Talk with children about their parents: It is common for children in care to feel loyalty issues (guilt if they feel happy with you when they are not with their parents). Help them understand it is okay to think and talk about their parents in positive ways. It is a good idea to do this before the holidays get here. •Help children find ways to participate: Consider your child’s cultural background and identify with each child ways that you can make the holidays meaningful for them. Involve them in planning around the potential activities and share expectations to help them relax. •Have a clear plan: Children in care often struggle with a lack of control in their lives. They tend to do 88 uuttaahhffoosstteerrccaarree..oorrgg/southwest « Have questions? Check here, first! FosterRoster 7 Rules to Teach Kids Online Etiquette COURTESY COUNTS ONLINE, TOO. By: Caroline Knorr Senior Parenting Editor | Mom of one https://www.commonsensemedia.org/blog/7-rules-to-teach-kids-online-etiquette# (though not their real name) that they wouldn't be embarrassed to utter out loud in front of, say, their grandmother. Double-check before you hit "send." Could something you wrote be misinterpreted? Is it so littered with slang that it requires a Ph.D. in Urban Dictionary to be understood? Is it rude, mean, or sarcastic? Don't send it. Take the high road (but don't boast about it). Chatting, texting, and status updates are all "in-the-moment" communication. But if there's an escalating sense of rudeness, sign off. No good will come of firing off a nasty comment. You can always write out a response to get something off your chest ... without sending it. Grammar rules. Rumors of grammar's demise have been greatly exaggerated. But again, context is key. An IM to a friend can dangle as many participles as you want, but The online activity of our children is constantly in the news anything more formal -- for example, a public online and on our minds as parents. As I was researching this comment or a note to a teacher -- should represent your topic I found this article on Common Sense Media and best self. This applies to capital letters, too. By now, wanted to pass the information along to you. – Darcey everyone knows that writing in all caps means that you're Hirst, Statewide Retention Services Coordinator, UFC shouting, but it bears repeating once your kid starts interacting online. Teaching Kids Online Manners: Lots of kids -- and alas, adults -- treat the internet like an anything-goes no- Keep a secret. In today's world, photos, texts, and videos man's land. That can be part of the fun -- within reason. can be posted, copied, forwarded, downloaded, and Photoshopped in the blink of an eye. If you think But when people choose aggressively mean-spirited something might embarrass someone, get them in screen names, make spiteful comments, hide behind trouble, compromise their privacy, or stir up drama of any anonymity to be cruel, send around photos to humiliate kind, keep it to yourself -- and maybe delete it for good others, or just act in a way that would be considered rude measure. in the real world, it creates an environment that doesn't allow kids to experience the best of what the web has to Don't hide. For safety's sake, kids should use untraceable offer. The negativity can actually hurt people and harm screen names, but using anonymity to cloak your actions reputations. can poison the atmosphere -- and hurt people. If your kids want to be contributing members of the online world, Here are some guidelines to make it a little more civil. encourage them to post productively. 7 RULES FOR ONLINE ETIQUETTE Remember the Golden Rule. Don't say something online that you wouldn't say to someone's face. And, according Context is everything. If kids want to have silly online to BeyondNetiquette creator Marla Rosner, author of names that conform to the convention of a particular Digital Manners and House Rules for Kids: A Parent online community and only their friends will see, fine. Handbook, you can actually take that a step further. If you But for more formal communication -- like email do have something negative to say, discussing it in person addresses, posting comments, or anything to do with is a better way to resolve your issues. school -- have them choose a respectable screen name December, 2016 & January, 2017 9 The Giving Season-Lots of Ways to Help! By Debbie Hofhines, Development Director, UFC • Take a Tour! Twice a month, Utah Foster Care hosts a "Journey with Utah Foster Care" tour to introduce the community to UFC, its mission and purpose. Contact me at debbie.hofhines@ utahfostercare.org for more details. • Giving Tuesday November 29th - Make a donation by visiting: https://givingtuesday.razoo.com/story/ Utahfostercare. • Company Gifts - Major Drilling, based in West Valley, presented Utah Foster Care with a giant check in October, gifting the proceeds of a golf tournament to benefit children in care. Sorenson Legacy Foundation and Utah Families Foundation have also contributed generously this year. Other companies match employees' monthly pledges, doubling the impact on children. We are inundated with holiday commercialization and the message of “buy, buy, buy”; most of us understand the Of course, we know that the best gift we can give a child true meaning of the season is to love and serve our fellow in foster care is a nurturing family. Research shows that humans. Our hearts are softened and we find ourselves having a healthy adult relationship in their lives, as well reaching out more to those who struggle so much in this as a skill or talent, greatly increases a child’s success as life. Caring individuals approach Utah Foster Care with a an adult. It also helps to “normalize” a young person’s desire to support children in foster care. Donations of experience while in foster care. quilts, backpacks, bedding, books and holiday gifts flood our offices because of generous caring communities. You probably aren't surprised to know that many children in foster care fear they'll be forgotten at Christmas Have you been approached by friends, family members, or because they are not home with their biological families. even community partners interested in ways they can Perhaps they’ve never experienced Christmas giving, as help the foster family community? Here are some was the case with several teen boys our family fostered. suggestions to give them (and possibly YOU, as you do Holidays can also trigger painful or traumatic memories your holiday shopping). for them. • Amazon Smile- Sign up for Amazon Smile and Kids in foster care deserve the same opportunities as choose UFC as your charity. UFC will benefit from their peers. How better to help them feel included than every purchase you make. Even if you have a prime allowing them to participate in family traditions and account, login in through www.smile.amazon.com celebrations? and choose our charity 87-0619181, Every time you login through smile.amazon.com, UFC and I’ve witnessed many beautiful gestures from truly selfless subsequently, kids in care will benefit. individuals and foundations and I’m grateful for my front-row seat. It especially helps drown out the “buy, buy, • Smith's - Planning holiday meals and a get- buy” noise and makes me thankful to be part of the together? Shop at Smiths and link your Smiths wonderful community of foster families. Rewards card to UFC. Cheers, • Wishing Well Fund – Holiday giving is great, but as you know, children in foster care have needs year- Debbie round. Tell them how a donation to our Wishing Well Fund at donate.utahfostercare.org/ can help grant [email protected] (801) 783-4004 special wishes to the children you care for and help "normalize" their lives. 10 utahfostercare.org FosterRoster