This page intentionally left blank others in mind Why are we so prone to guilt and embarrassment? Why do we care so much about how others see us, about our reputation? What are the origins of such afflictions? It is because we are members of a species that evolved the unique propensity to reflect upon themselves as the object of thoughts, an object of thoughts that is potentially evaluated by others. But, Philippe Rochat’s argu- mentgoes,thispropensitycomesfromabasicfear:thefearofrejection,ofbeing socially ‘‘banned’’ and ostracized. Others in Mind is about self-consciousness, howitoriginatesandhowitshapesourlives.Self-consciousnessisarguablythe mostimportantandrevealingofallpsychologicalproblems. Philippe Rochat is a professor in the Department of Psychology at Emory University in Atlanta. Born and raised in Geneva, Switzerland, he earned a Ph.D.attheUniversityofGeneva,wherehewastrainedinpsychologybyJean Piaget and his close collaborators. The author of The Infant’s World (2001), Rochat is currently researching the emergence of a moral sense during the preschoolyearsinchildrenallovertheworldgrowingupinhighlycontrasted cultural environments andsocioeconomic circumstances. Others in Mind social origins of self-consciousness Philippe Rochat EmoryUniversity CAMBRIDGEUNIVERSITYPRESS Cambridge, New York, Melbourne, Madrid, Cape Town, Singapore, São Paulo, Delhi, Dubai, Tokyo Cambridge University Press The Edinburgh Building, Cambridge CB2 8RU, UK Published in the United States of America by Cambridge University Press, New York www.cambridge.org Information on this title: www.cambridge.org/9780521506359 © Philippe Rochat 2009 This publication is in copyright. Subject to statutory exception and to the provision of relevant collective licensing agreements, no reproduction of any part may take place without the written permission of Cambridge University Press. First published in print format 2009 ISBN-13 978-0-511-71935-6 eBook (NetLibrary) ISBN-13 978-0-521-50635-9 Hardback ISBN-13 978-0-521-72965-9 Paperback Cambridge University Press has no responsibility for the persistence or accuracy of urls for external or third-party internet websites referred to in this publication, and does not guarantee that any content on such websites is, or will remain, accurate or appropriate. contents Foreword byJeroˆme Bruner page vii Preface ix Introduction:Main Ideas 1 1 Self-Conscious Species 17 2 Six Propositions 35 3 Varieties of Self-Reflective Mind State 43 4 Mind States in Development 61 5 Birth of Self-Consciousness 86 6 Shame and Self-Knowledge 105 7 The Roots of Guilt 118 8 Giving and Sharing 130 9 Origins of Owning and Sharing 155 10 Social Construction of Identity 191 Conclusion: Moral Space and the Self 213 Postscript Note 229 References 235 Index 243 v foreword jer me bruner Oˆ This is an astonishing book, astonishing both in its range and in what it seeks to make clear. Its central concern is with the nature and origins of selfhood,adistinctivelyhumanphenomenon.Itsrathercontrarianviewis that Selfhood emerges as a product of inevitable uncertainties about our acceptance by the larger group or, more broadly, as a product of our doubts about how Others see us. Self, in a word, is then a joint project, Cogitamus, ergo sum, rather than the simplex Cartesian Cogito, ergo sum. Selfhood is not just a product of inner processes but it expresses the out- come of real or imagined exchanges with Others. Thisisabookofastonishing breadth,forPhilippeRochatexploresnot onlydifferentformsofself-awareness,butalsothevariedsettingsinwhich such self-awareness may be evoked. And in the process he leans upon evidence from his own well-known experimental studies of young chil- dren, evidence from linguistic theory itself, and evidence from compara- tiveculturalstudiesofpeoplesaroundtheworld.Forhim,theevidenceis overwhelmingly, ‘‘Without others, there is no self-consciousness.’’ Indeed,itisthisother-relatednatureofself-awareness,withitsaccom- panying fear of rejection, that creates the compelling dynamic of shame that is so much a feature of human awareness. It seems an odd way of puttingit,butforRochatselfhoodisasmuchifnotmoreahumandistress makerasadistressdispeller(asitisinFreudianthinking).Forhim,shame and personal distress are, as it were, inherent in the way we perceive and evaluate our lives. Yet, while this may seem a dark view of the human condition, it is one that leads us to see the human effort to avoid shame and humiliation in a broader, less self-condemnatory way. Indeed, though this book is strikingly modern, even postmodern, it reflects some ancient philosophical themes, two in particular. The first of these (in the author’s words) is that ‘‘without others we are nothing.’’ vii viii Foreword And thesecond isthat whatwethinkandfeelisdriven byafearof being rejected by others. Ancient indeed, for both figure in Greek drama, as in Aeschylus’s Oresteia trilogy. Yet persistently modern as well, as in post-Vichy France, with Sartre’s classic ‘‘Hell is the Others.’’ It is admir- able how Philippe Rochat revisits these ancient concepts in their modern setting(s) and makes us aware again of their inevitability. Rochatismostinvolvedwiththesubjectiveconsequencesofourforever ‘‘figuring out’’ what the other fellow has concluded about us. And our conception of ourselves, our selfhood, derives from this figuring out. We donotwanttobefoundtoowanting,andifwefeelthatothersfindusso, we suffer by a self-imposed reduction in self-pride or self-assurance. In fact, we deal with the balancing act imposed by making up tales to reveal how we ‘‘truly’’ are, and why we need not feel so ashamed. Selfhood, indeed, is a compromise between self-blame and self-praise – the two usually balanced by a narrative that includes them both. WeareallenormouslyinPhilippeRochat’sdebtforhishavingreopened manyoftheseissues–andIchoosemywordswithcare,foritisareopen- ingthatwearewitnessing.Whatisinterestingtocontemplateiswherewe go from here. Is it a sign of our time that we choose, in these times of trouble,tocreateSelfhoodoutofourmodernsenseoffailuretoliveupto expectations? Where next?