MMMMMyyyyy CCCCChhhhhiiiiilllllddddd HHHHHaaaaasssss aaaaa BBBBBrrrrraaaaaiiiiinnnnn IIIIInnnnnjjjjjuuuuurrrrryyyyy What do I do now? Written By: Edited By: Frank Toral Marilyn Lash For more information on how you can help your child, please visit wwwwwwwwwwwwwww.....mmmmmyyyyyccccchhhhhiiiiillllldddddhhhhhaaaaasssssaaaaabbbbbrrrrraaaaaiiiiinnnnniiiiinnnnnjjjjjuuuuurrrrryyyyy.....cccccooooommmmm For additional information or copies of this booklet, please contact: Frank Toral at Toral Professional Building 4780 Davie Road, Suite 101, Fort Lauderdale, FL 33314 Email: [email protected] Toll Free: 1-866-747-7848 wwwwwwwwwwwwwww.....mmmmmyyyyyccccchhhhhiiiiillllldddddhhhhhaaaaasssssaaaaabbbbbrrrrraaaaaiiiiinnnnniiiiinnnnnjjjjjuuuuurrrrryyyyy.....cccccooooommmmm copyrighted by Frank Toral, 2006 TTTTTaaaaabbbbbllllleeeee ooooofffff CCCCCooooonnnnnttttteeeeennnnntttttsssss Message of Hope and Encouragement......................................1 Foreword..........................................................................2 About the Author & Editor...................................................3 Introduction......................................................................5 Step 1 Understand What Has Happened to Your Child................7 Step 2 Create Your Blanket of Support..................................15 Step 3 Consider How Your Child's Treatment Will Be Funded....19 Step 4 Hire a Competent Legal Team....................................21 Step 5 Become an Advocate for Your Child...........................27 Step 6 Take Care of Yourself..............................................28 Step 7 Seek Out Available Resources.....................................29 Step 8 The Next Step.........................................................35 Step 9 Know the Bill of Rights for Parents...............................36 Step 10 Organize Your Thoughts..........................................37 More information on Brain Injury in Children..........................39 AAAAAccccckkkkknnnnnooooowwwwwllllleeeeedddddgggggmmmmmeeeeennnnnttttt This book is dedicated to all the parents, families and friends of chil- dren who have sustained a Traumatic Brain Injury (TBI). I have endeav- ored to provide what I trust will be useful information and resources that will help you, and your child or friend on their journey of recovery. I want to encourage you by sharing with you that hope and faith can make a differ- ence; there Can Be a better tomorrow. Please allow me to thank those who assisted me in the preparation of this book. First, I would like to thank Tracy East, who following her son's brain injury, shared her vision with me of bringing hope and encouragement to all parents, families, and friends of children with Traumatic Brain Injury, through her pioneering orga- nization which she founded, Mother's Against Brain Injury, Inc. Thank you to Valerie Breen (Executive Director, Brain Injury Association of Florida, Inc.), for her passion in providing resources and statewide support to survivors of brain injury and their families. I would also like to thank Betty Paleolog-Torres and Alex Garcia in my law firm without whom this book would not have been pos- sible. Finally, thanks to Marilyn Lash, whose editing and caring words continue to inspire and bring hope to families just like you all over the United States. AAAAA MMMMMeeeeessssssssssaaaaagggggeeeee ooooofffff HHHHHooooopppppeeeee &&&&& EEEEEnnnnncccccooooouuuuurrrrraaaaagggggeeeeemmmmmeeeeennnnnttttt By Tracy East President/Founder Mothers Against Brain Injury, Inc. Let me begin by promising that you will get through this and that you are NOT ALONE. I know first hand what you may be feeling right now - frightened, confused, and helpless. Just like you, I received the phone call every parent fears. My 16 year old son, Justin, was in- volved in a serious car accident in 2004. When I arrived at the hospital, he was in a coma with a serious traumatic brain injury (TBI) and a fractured vertebra. It is hard to see your child hurt so badly. I was unable to call upon my natural instinct to "fix" the problem. It left me in a fog of uncertainty and desperation. So I know what you are going through right now. Please take comfort in the fact that many children have come through this process and gone on to remarkable recoveries. Though it is hard to see right now, soon the fog will lift. Things can and will get better, but it takes time. The brain is an extremely complicated organ and it is an amazing part of our bodies. It has its own way of healing, but again, it does this in its own time. Sometimes it takes days, some- times weeks and sometimes even longer before we see progress and change. Have faith in the power of love and hope. Pray for patience and it will come. Know that there are many people who understand and are willing and able to help you through this difficult time. We will all be by your side, if not in person, then in thought and prayer. God bless you. 1 FFFFFooooorrrrreeeeewwwwwooooorrrrrddddd By Marilyn Lash When a child has a brain injury, everyone in the family is affected in some way. Parents, siblings, grand- parents, aunts, uncles and cousins - they will worry, have questions, and try to help you through this difficult time. The amount of information that you are hearing as you talk with doc- tors, nurses, specialists and therapists can feel overwhelming. You have en- tered the world of Brain Injury and it is filled with unfamiliar medical terms, treatment procedures and specialists. The future may look very uncertain as you try to make sense of what it means when a child - your child - has a brain injury. You may be asking, "What do I do now?" This booklet brings together a lot of information that will help you… (cid:22) understand your child's condition (cid:22) become familiar with stages of care and treatment (cid:22) identify legal and financial resources for your child's care (cid:22) find support and assistance from family and friends and (cid:22) learn about services in the community. During your child's first days or weeks of care in a Trauma Cen- ter, the last thing you may want to think about are insurance, finances and legal issues. This booklet explains why it is important to learn about them in the beginning of your child's care. This is just the beginning of the long road home. 2 AAAAAbbbbbooooouuuuuttttt ttttthhhhheeeee AAAAAuuuuuttttthhhhhooooorrrrr FFFFFrrrrraaaaannnnnkkkkk TTTTTooooorrrrraaaaalllll Frank Toral resides in Cooper City, Florida with his loving wife, Olivia, their beautiful daughter, Nina and the family boxer, Mia. The Toral family is very active in their hometown community and church. Mr. Toral is the Managing Partner of the Law Offices of Toral & Associates, a statewide law firm concentrating in traumatic brain injury and spinal cord injury cases. He has successfully represented many families whose children have suffered a brain injury. Mr. Toral’s commitment to survivors of brain injury extends be- yond the law. He is the current President-Elect of Brain Injury Asso- ciation of Florida, Inc. and a Board member of Mothers Against Brain Injury, Inc. as well as the University of Miami/Jackson Memo- rial Hospital Pediatric Neurotrauma Advisory Board. Mr. Toral is a guest lecturer on topics related to pediatrics and neurotrauma. He is a proud sponsor of many charitable causes, but is particularly proud of his sponsorship of Mothers Against Brain Injury, Inc. and the Brain Injury Association of Florida, Inc. As a lawyer having represented many children, teens and adults, who survived a Traumatic Brain Injury, I have seen the despair in parents' eyes and hopelessness on their faces while they anxiously wonder if their loved one is going to get through this. One thing that has given many of my clients hope is faith. Through faith in God, I have seen hope restored, lives trans- formed, recovery succeed and people of all ages go on to live mean- ingful lives following a Traumatic Brain Injury. It is my personal belief that faith in God plays more than just a passing role in helping you, the parent, through this difficult time and ultimately helping your child get better. As you sit in the hospital room and wait for your child to get better under the care of caring medical professionals and the caring and guidance of your blanket of support, getting God involved in the process may significantly influence the outcome. But those who wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength. They shall mount up with wings as eagles. They shall run and not be weary. They shall walk and not faint. Isaiah 40:31 3 Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own under- standing; In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct your paths. Proverbs 3:5-6 While you may feel that your present situation is out of your control, it is not out of God's control. AAAAAbbbbbooooouuuuuttttt ttttthhhhheeeee EEEEEdddddiiiiitttttooooorrrrr MMMMMaaaaarrrrriiiiilllllyyyyynnnnn LLLLLaaaaassssshhhhh Marilyn Lash has personal experience with what families face when a child has a brain injury. She can still recall the events many years ago that followed her brother's brain injury as her parents searched for proper treatment, depleted their savings, advocated for educa- tional programs, and looked for services. Over the years, she saw her parents' experience repeated many times by other families during her career as a social worker in rehabilitation programs at Massachusetts General Hospital and Braintree Hospital in Boston. This led to her interest in developing community programs that would be more responsive to the needs of persons with brain injuries and their families. In her work at the Research and Training Center in Childhood Trauma at Tufts-New England Medical Center in Bos- ton, she became an expert on the impact of traumatic brain inju- ries on families and the special educational needs of these children. Looking back over her personal and professional experience, her greatest interest is developing information and materials that will help families understand the consequences of brain injury and prepare them for the changes in their lives. The founding of Lash and Associates Publishing/Training, Inc. in 1996 has been the fulfillment of this dream of providing practical user friendly information on the effects of brain injury in children and adults. Ms. Lash is also Vice Chair of the Statewide Advisory Council on Trau- matic Brain Injury in North Carolina and past Chair of the Board of Directors for the Brain Injury Association of North Carolina. She has served on many national advisory boards and editorial boards. 4 IIIIInnnnntttttrrrrroooooddddduuuuuccccctttttiiiiiooooonnnnn Just hearing the words, "Your child has a brain injury" can be incredibly frightening. The implications may be confusing and overwhelming. As a parent, you want to protect your child. A brain injury can leave you feeling frustrated and powerless. We hope that this booklet provides hope and empowers you with infor- mation and knowledge to help your- self and your child. You will find a lot of information in the following pages. Do not be overwhelmed as you will find "Help Sheets" in the back of this booklet to guide you. AAAAA wwwwwooooorrrrrddddd ooooofffff eeeeexxxxxppppplllllaaaaannnnnaaaaatttttiiiiiooooonnnnn The words “family” and “parents” are used often in this booklet. They are used in a general sense and include all parents -whether married, single, widowed or divorced. There are also families where parenting is done by step-parents, grandparents, adoptive parents, foster parents, guardians, and even close friends or relatives. Families have many different members and living arrangements. Not all chil- dren live at home or with both parents. Please apply the words family and parents to your situation. The word “child” is used to apply to all ages whether an infant, toddler, school-age child or adolescent. Despite our children’s fre- quent wish to grow up as soon as possible, they are still their parents’ children. 5 6