LIFE SKILLS COMMUNICATION—HOW IS IT MADE UP? 1. Creating a Message.  2. Sending it to another person.  3. Message is received.  4. Message is interpreted.  5. The other person responds to the  message. These steps complete the process of  communication. 1. Positive Eye Contact: Looking in eyes and  validating (acknowledging) the other individual. You don’t have to agree to what they are saying nor to their behavior. 2. Quality Conversation: Sharing thoughts  and feelings on an sincere level. It takes 43,000 muscles to form non-verbal  facial expressions. 90% of communication is non-verbal. These are wordless messages communicated  through gesture, body language or posture; facial expression and eye contact. 1. Builds trust and respect.  2. Enables the disputants to release their  emotions. 3. Reduce tensions.  4. Encourage the surfacing of information.  5. Create a safe environment that is  conducive to collaborative problem solving. 1. Be interested. Be alert and not distracted.  2. Create a positive atmosphere through  nonverbal behavior. 3. Allow the speaker to bounce ideas and  feelings off you and don’t be critical or judgmental. 4. Don’t act like a DA and ask a lot of  questions. With words can you express your feelings and  needs? This is called “I” messages.  I feel _______ when you ________because I  think that you_________. Example: I feel sad when you make that  statement because I think that you don’t respect me. Good boundaries help everyone understand what is expected of them, and what constitutes going too far. Everyone in your workplace has a job description. Write a job description for yourself and the position of others in your life. TYPICAL SELF- RESPONSIBLE SELF- STATEMENT STATEMENT HE MADE ME MAD. I MADE MYSELF MAD. IT GOT ME UPSET. I UPSET MYSELF. MY FAMILY DISTURBED I DISTURBED MYSELF ME. ABOUT MY FAMILY. THEY GOT UNDER MY I LET THEM GET UNDER SKIN. MY SKIN. SHE SHOULDN’T UPSET BETTER THAT I NOT ME THAT WAY. UPSET MYSELF. I can’t believe they did it to me again.  This isn’t fair. I am not going to put up with  it. I have to do something fast, or I will look  like an idiot. What is my neighbor, friend, co-workers,  family and pastor going to think? If she/he doesn’t shut her/his mouth right  now, she/he is going to really regret it. What a jerk! 