Generated by ABC Amber LIT Converter, http://www.processtext.com/abclit.html James Alan Gardner Ascending This one is to all the gang from Clarion West '89: I'm a lousy correspondent, but I still remember. A WORD ABOUT OAR Oar, the narrator of this story, first appeared in the novelExpendable. At the end of that book, she was left for dead after she grabbed an enemy and plunged with him from a window on the eightieth floor of a building. To human eyes, Oar is as clear and transparent as glass. Although she actually has bones, muscles, and an assortment of internal organs, these were bioengineered to be indiscernible when humans look through her skin. Oar's ancestors were humans themselves, born on Earth around 2000 B.C. At that time, a collection of Homo sapiens were removed by aliens to the planet Melaquin, where the aliens gave these people a new home. The aliens didn't explain why they did this, but they built the humans beautiful glass cities with self-repairing robotic systems designed to provide all the comforts of life. The aliens gave these humans one additional gift: the people's children were born as strong, intelligent glasslike humanoids who never grew old or sick, and who were tough enough to withstand damage that would kill normal flesh and blood. Only later did it become apparent that these glass offspring had a flaw: although their bodies could survive for millennia, their minds were not so long-lasting. Around the age of fifty, these people succumbed to so-called "Tired Brains"—they lost interest in all aspects of existence, often just lying down and never bothering to get up again. They could still stir themselves if something remarkable happened, but for the most part, they remained catatonic down through the centuries. Glass parents continued to have glass children, but in decreasing numbers. The population declined in cities, towns, and villages all over Melaquin—gradual extinction from pure ennui. By the time of the events inExpendable (the Earth year 2452 A.D.), almost the entire species had fallen into apathetic hibernation. Only a few were still young enough to have active brains. InExpendable, Oar was forty-five... on the verge of her race's customary "senility." Now she's four years older. From Festina Ramos: Generated by ABC Amber LIT Converter, http://www.processtext.com/abclit.html I met Oar beside a moonlit lake, just after dusk on the day I had murdered my best friend. She was tall, sad, and impossibly beautiful: like an Art Deco figurine molded from purest crystal. Yes—she was made of glass. Looking through her, I could see the beach, the moon, the world... focused through a woman-shaped lens. When I think about her, I can't help perceiving her glass body as a metaphor. She was, for example, transparent as glass emotionally. When she was angry, she raged; when frightened, she trembled; when lonely, she wept. She was as open as a child... and people who didn't know her often dismissed her as childish, unintelligent, bratty. Oar was none of those things—she was a fully grown woman with an intelligence high off the scales (she learned fluent English in just a few weeks), and her constant claims of superiority to us "opaque persons" weren't arrogant but heartbreaking: an attempt to convince herself she had some value in the universe. Like glass, she was fragile. Not physically, of course: she was damned near unbreakable, and immune to disease, drowning, even starvation (she could photosynthesize energy from the weakest light sources). She was strong too—fast and agile. But mentally, Oar was ready to shatter. Thousands of years ago, her kind was created by unknown aliens in mimicry ofHomo sapiens... but due to a design flaw (accidental or deliberate), the glass race always suffered mental shutdown by age fifty. First, a tendency to boredom; then, a growing listlessness; finally, a descent into torpor, a sleep that could only be broken by the most extreme measures and then only for a few minutes before senility crept back in. Oar was on the verge of that abyss. Her whole species was. They didn't die, they just grew Tired: turning into ageless glass statues, alive but dormant. As Oar approached the age when her brain would betray her, she fought her fate, she denied it, she raged; and in the end, it seemed as if she had found a way out. During a battle to save her world from extinction, she sacrificed herself by plunging from the top of an eighty-story tower, taking with her a madman who planned the destruction of her planet. I wept when I saw her body smashed on the pavement... but I told myself that by choosing death, Oar had avoided a more cruel destiny—the gradual loss of who she was, the dull fade-out to oblivion. Her glass would have warped with age: the lens going dark, the mirror turning cloudy. But I was wrong. Oar didn't die in that fall—she was tougher than I ever imagined. Bulletproof glass. And now that she's back, pursued by inhuman creatures with secrets to hide, the question is whether she can avoid mental oblivion long enough to save those of us who need her help. Running from aliens, dodging the gunfire, trying to figure out what the hell's going on before we all get killed... hey, it's just like old times. 1: WHEREIN I AM NOT DEAD AFTER ALL My Story This is my story, the Story of Oar. It is a wonderful story. I was in another story once, but it was not so wonderful, as I died in the end. That was very most sad indeed. But it turns out I am not such a one as Generated by ABC Amber LIT Converter, http://www.processtext.com/abclit.html stays dead forever, especially when I only fell eighty floors to the pavement. I am made of sterner stuff than that. Actually, I am made of glass: clear, see-through glass. I am therefore extremely beautiful... more beautiful than you, but you should not feel bad about that, because you cannot help being opaque. People who are not beautiful—or strong and clever and wise, as I also am—should take comfort from being ugly and boring, because you will never be Called By Fate to undertake Difficult Adventures. Fate does not invite ugly boring people to save the world; and if youdo try to save the world (without being beautiful, strong, clever, or wise), you will soon die pointlessly—and how much adventure is there in that? I do not die in this story. Those of you who have looked at the last page—which is only sensible, because you wish to make sure I do not make a long speech telling what lessons I have learned—those who have looked at the end will know that instead of dying, I wineverything. I defeat the bad people, am adored by the good people, and get to say, "I told you so," as freely as I wish. That is the whole point of being in stories: to have a Happy Ending. My Technique When I decided to present my story to opaque persons, I endeavored to learn what chronicling techniques are popular with your kind. My research methods were most diligent... which is to say, I waited for my friend Festina to leave the room, then instructed her computer to show me any documents she had written of a narrative nature. Therefore, I have discovered that the proper way to write for Earthlings is to divide one's tale into modestly brief sections with titles at the top, such asMy Technique. This is certainly an Effective Literary Device, especially when addressing persons with a short attention span. The technique also helps one skim ahead for sections whose titles seem more exciting than the passage one is supposed to read next. Thus one can jump forward to readFacing A Hellish Maw before coming back toConversing With A Little Man Whose Sole Amusing Quality Is That He Is Colored Orange. Most importantly, putting many titles into a story makes it easier to find your place if you happen to use your book to smash an irksome buzzing fly, and you hit the fly so hard that pieces of metal and plastic go shooting out of the book mechanism, so then you are forced to put the story chip into a new reader and you cannot remember where you were. That happens more often than you might expect. My Resting Place After I Died When I woke after my eighty-story plunge, I felt most horrible indeed. Many things inside me hurt worse than they had ever hurt before... which is not saying much, because this was the first time I had been seriously injured, but pain is more dreadful when one is unaccustomed to physical suffering. If I took a deep breath, sharp aches erupted all across my ribs, as if a dozen axes were chopping at me. And behold, Idid have an ax pressed against my flesh: a beautiful silver one I have always carried as both weapon and woodcutting tool. However, the ax was not attacking me in any way; it simply lay on my Generated by ABC Amber LIT Converter, http://www.processtext.com/abclit.html chest, as if someone had put it there after I fell. To be honest, I was glad to have the ax with me—it provided a sense of protection. For a brief moment, I tried to cuddle the blade more snugly to me as if it were a pet or a toy... but the pain of moving my arms made my vision blur with tears. Every muscle felt bruised to a pulp; I wondered what bruised glass looked like, but knew if I lifted my head to see, the agony would be more than I could bear. Therefore, I just lay where I was. It happened to be a hot pleasant place to lie, with an abundance of soothing light. I am such a one as absorbs many wavelengths outside the visible spectrum. Radio waves, X-rays, and gamma particles are like vitamins to me, while infrared and ultraviolet are basic food groups. (I also eat real food, as produced by the synthesizing machines found in every community of my world. But when I am not having Adventures, I can survive quite well on nothing hot sunshine, provided I get a little rain as well.) Where I was lying, I felt a light spray of water from time to time. I opened my mouth and let the drops trickle down my throat. The water tasted slightly of minerals that were probably good for me. The light and water and minerals indicated I was in a Home for Ancestors. There are many such Homes on my planet Melaquin, though I did not know this before I became a world traveler. These Homes are designed to contain persons with Tired Brains: persons who have lost interest in life and simply want to lie someplace warm. To keep them happy, every town has skyscraping towers where Ancestors can lie all day, getting plenty of light and squirts of enriched water. It is a boring way to spend the time, and I had promised myself I would never get so sad and lonely that I surrendered to languishing numbness... but when one is damaged from falling a long way, it is not so very cowardly to rest for a while in the bright quiet. So that is what I did. Clear-Cutting Now and then, I told myself, "Oar, you must arise, you must find something to do." But therewas nothing to do. The Home took care of my physical needs, and beyond that, I could think of no goals I wished to accomplish. There was a time when my world was full of great people doing great deeds. We had a Thriving Culture, creating lovely music and art and literature—the teaching machines in my home village had taught me all about the splendid achievements of our past. I would gladly recite some of our excellent poetry for you, but it does not translate so very well into Earthling languages and anyway, I confess there are gaps in my grasp of human vocabulary: I have worked hard to memorize yourbest words, but I cannot be bothered to learn the second-rate ones (which is to say, the ones with no counterparts in my native tongue). Besides, I have no real ambition to be a poet... or an artist or even musician. In my whole life, I have only embraced one useful occupation—using my ax to cut down trees, I did this because a human Explorer told me that deforestation was how cultured persons tended their planets: clearing land in preparation for constructing farms and roads and cities. I did not know how to construct things, but I was excellent at chopping down timber; so that is what I did. It turns out I destroyed so much woodland, the results were noticeable from space... which became a Generated by ABC Amber LIT Converter, http://www.processtext.com/abclit.html source of much pride—once an Explorer informed me of my achievement. That Explorer had been an opaque human named Festina Ramos. When I first met Festina, she was lost and frantic, marooned on my planet with no means of escape. I therefore embarked on my first great Adventure: to return Festina to her own people. I did not quite know how that Adventure had turned out, since I suffered my terrible fall before Festina went home; but my friend was not here now, so I assumed we had triumphed in all particulars. Through selfless heroism, I had helped Festina leave Melaquin... and I could congratulate myself on a Glowing Success. But as I lay inside the Tower of Ancestors, drowsily reflecting on My Life So Far, I felt no thrill of achievement. Festina was gone, as if she had never been here at all—what did I have to show for my time with her? I had chopped down vast stands of trees, but to what end? No farms or roads would ever be built on the cleared land, for my people were almost extinct. To be sure, millions were still alive all around the globe; but they did nothing except breathe and soak up light. They had no goals or purpose... and what purpose couldI find alone in a world of the dead? Of course, there was always the chance a new group of Explorers would visit my planet. Earthling Explorers tended to be repugnantly opaque, not to mention uncouth and slow to understand the simplest things, but at least they could supply me with acclamatory feedback: "Oar, you cut down trees more prettily than anyone else in the universe!" (Except they would put this sentiment in their own words to achieve the effect of sincerity.) Then I would once more feel joy in changing the face of my planet, and would know that my life had Direction. All I required was someone to assure me I was not wasting my existence on meaningless busy work. I waited for someone like that to come along. And eventually, he did. Being Roused By A Small Orange Alien One day, I awoke to find an alien creature shouting into my face. "Are you Oar?" it yelled in the language of Explorers. "Come on, baby, wake up. Tell me if you're Oar." "I am not a baby," I answered. "I am forty-five years old." "If you're Oar, you're older than that. You should be forty-nine by now.Are you Oar?" "Who wants to know?" The creature leaning over me was neither glass nor human. However, itwas approximately human-shaped, with two arms, two legs, and a head. The head did not have normal ears; instead, there were two bulgy balls on top of the skull, like puffy mushrooms growing from the scalp. For clothes, the alien wore a white short-sleeved shirt, gray short-legged pants, and tan sandals, all of them stained with spills of unknown origin. The creature's scaly flesh was not transparent like mine, nor anywhere on the pink-to-brown-to-black spectrum of Earthlings. Instead, the skin was a shade of orange that grew darker as I watched: from tangerine to pumpkin to an extremely burnt ocher. This struck me as thoroughly foolish—an alien who can change color should endeavor to become clear and beautiful, not more opaque and unattractive. But the universe is full of beings with Different Views Of Generated by ABC Amber LIT Converter, http://www.processtext.com/abclit.html Life. Often these views are stupid and wrong, but a wise-minded one (such as I) always practices tolerance in the company of irrational persons. Conversing With A Little Man Whose Sole Amusing Quality Is That He Is Colored Orange "The name's Uclodda Unorr," said the darkening orange creature, "but everybody calls me Uclod. As in, 'Get off my foot, Uclod!' " The alien grinned as if it had just told a joke. I decided this creature must be male; only a man could believe I might be charmed by such a feeble witticism. I also concluded he must be ayoung man—perhaps in his early twenties. An older person would not gaze at me quite so eagerly hoping for approval. When the alien saw I merely stared at him without amusement, he harrumphed in his throat and went back to his former line of questioning. "So spill it, missy—are you Oar or not? I was told you'd be lying here starkers with an ax cuddled against your wallabies; but I was also told you'd be dead, so there's obviously something out of whack." Clutching my ax, I sat up and glared at this Uclod person. Though I was seated on the floor, he was not so much taller than I. If I stood, his head would only come to the level of my wallabies. (You will notice how quickly I pick up words from foreign languages.) "I am Oar," I told him frostily. "An oar is an implement used to propel boats."[1] [1]—It is a custom of my people to suggest how others may remember our names: since our older citizens have Tired Brains, they need all the memory aids they can get. I was not actually named after a paddle—that would be very foolish, because I am a person, not a stick of wood—but the English word "oar" sounds much like my real name. (For those who wonder what Oar means in my own language, it translates to "extremely clever and beautiful person whom everyone envies even if they are too small-minded to admit it." At least, that is what it means now.) "That's exactly the phrase I wanted to hear," Uclod said. "And you're an acquaintance of Festina Ramos?" "I am Festina's dearest friend. We went on a great Adventure recently; she is my Faithful Sidekick." "Your adventure wasn't so recent, toots," Uclod replied. "It was four Terran years ago. What've you been doing with yourself? Just letting your brain go to mush?" "No," I told him, "I have been resting to recuperate from grievous wounds." But it was most disturbing to hear that four whole years had gone by. One less courageous than I might be scared she had let so much time pass in a daze. She might worry most acutely that her brain was getting Tired like the elderly persons around her. Fortunately, I am not such a one as gets the shivers over a little thing like aging. My brain was not Tired. My brain wasjust fine. Generated by ABC Amber LIT Converter, http://www.processtext.com/abclit.html Proving I Am Just Fine "Are you all right?" Uclod asked. "Yes. I am superb." To demonstrate, I rose to my feet with fluid grace... and if I chose to lean on my ax, I did not need a crutch, I was merely taking a Sensible Precaution. This was the first time I had roused myself to stand since my calamitous fall; perhaps I would be wobbly or infirm. But I felt no pain or stiffness—my ribs did not ache when I took a breath, and my battered-bruised muscles had healed to their usual perfection. Perhaps I reallyhad been lying in a doze for four whole years—long enough to recover from all my injuries. But the time for dozing was over. "There," I said, feeling better now that I was taller than the little orange man with balls on his head. "You see how well I am." "Can't argue with that," he replied, staring up at my wallabies. "You got definite photogenic appeal. Pity you look so much like a computer-generated effect." I did not understand him, so I assumed he was talking nonsense. Many people do. "Why are you here?" I asked. "Did Festina Ramos send you?" "Nope, a friend of hers. Well, not exactly a friend—a fellow admiral. Alexander York." Uclod leered as though he believed the name would shock me. It did not. "Who is this Alexander York person? And why should I care about him even a little bit?" The small man's grin faded. "Missy, youhave been out of touch, haven't you?" "I have been right here. It is everyone else who has been out of touch." "You got me there." Uclod wiped sweat from his forehead. "Can we talk about this outside? My skin blocks most of the radiation in here, but I'm still getting my gizzards cooked." "There is no radiation in this tower," I told him, "there is simply an abundant supply of light. But I do not want your gizzards to cook, for then you might smell even worse than you do already. Let us go." A Clear Path To The Exit Together we headed for the exit. The route was unobstructed, which I found most odd: usually Ancestral Homes have dozens of elderly persons littering the floor, particularly near the front entrance. Those with brains on the verge of exhaustion have a deplorable habit of walking in from the street and flumping straight down on the closest patch of unoccupied ground. After several generations, there is no space at all in the first few rooms. But here, the clutter had been partly cleared. Though many senile persons still sprawled about, they were Generated by ABC Amber LIT Converter, http://www.processtext.com/abclit.html all shoved against the glass walls to make an open path up the middle. The path led straight to where I had lain. "Did you do that?" I asked Uclod. "Did you move these people out of the way?" "Not me, toots. It was like this when I got here." "Then it is a Mystery," I told him. "I enjoy solving mysteries. I am excellent at rational deduction." "I can see that," Uclod replied... though his gaze was directed at a part of my person that is seldom associated with intelligent thought. "Wait," I told him. "Observe my methods." Then I walked to the side of the path and kicked an old man so hard he flew off the floor and smashed into the wall. The secret is to get your toe underneath the body. Use a strong scooping action. "Whoa, missy!" Uclod cried. "Are you trying to kill that guy?" "Do not be foolish," I answered. "My people cannot be killed. They seldom even feel pain—especially those whose brains are Tired. Look." I pointed to the man I had kicked. Though he now lay awkwardly against the wall, he showed no sign of being roused from his stupor; he had slept through the whole thing. On the other hand, my kick had propelled him onto an old woman, and she was not nearly so lethargic. Indeed, she embarked upon a Storm Of Invective wherein she claimed to know all about my parentage, particularly how my mother became pregnant and what unusual measures she took thereafter. The woman was wrong in almost every respect, but her ill-informed harangue proved her brain was not so Tired as those around her. "Hush, old woman,"I told her in our own language."I wish to ask you a question—" "Who are you calling old?"the woman grumbled."You're likely older than I am—" "I am not!"I snapped. "What'd she say?" Uclod asked. He had not understood our words, but he must have recognized the anger in my tone. "She said I was old," I told him. "Whereas, in fact, it isshe who is elderly." "How can you tell?" Uclod asked. "Yon look the same age to me." "Of course, we look the same—my species ceases to change physically after the age of twenty. But mentally this woman must be older than I; she lives in an Ancestral Home." "You've lived in this same home for the past four years. How do you know that lady didn't come in after you?" "Because..." I stopped. I was going to say I would have noticed if someone new arrived; but perhaps that was not so certain. Especially if the woman had arrived while I was sleeping. Generated by ABC Amber LIT Converter, http://www.processtext.com/abclit.html But no, she could not be younger than I. I was Mentally Alert, whereas the woman before me was already starting to lapse back into slumber. Her gaze was losing intensity; the fire that had flared up while she cursed me was now turning to ash. I tucked my hands under me woman's armpits, lifted her up, and slammed her back against the tower's glass wall. Uclod grimaced at the crack of glass bones on glass bricks... but I knew the wall would break long before this woman suffered the least bit of damage. My people are more sturdy than walls. "Wake up!"I shouted in the woman's face."Do not go to sleep again." "Why not?"Her collision with the wall had brought back the focus in her eyes, but her voice was sullen—like a cranky child who wants to remain in bed. "Because if you stay awake,"I told the woman,"you will be able to lead a rich life wherein you accomplish great things." "Like what?" "Like..."I looked about me for inspiration; seeing the open path down me center of me room, I remembered why I had awakened her in the first place."We shall solve a mystery, you and I. We can discover who cleared the space from me to the door." "Oh, I saw that,"the woman said."It was interesting. Sort of. I think..." Her voice was fading."Wake up!" I cried."Stay awake and talk to me." With a burst of fierceness, I thrust my silver ax close to the woman's face."Stay awake or I shall cut off your wallabies." "Missy!" Uclod said, staring at the ax. "What the hell are you doing?" "I am attempting to make a friend." Without letting him interrupt further, I turned back to the woman. "Talk to me. Talk to me about... about this interesting thing you saw." "There was an alien,"the woman replied with grumpy ill will."A big white thing—like some animals, but bigger than a buffalo and it didn't have a head." "Then where did it put its ears?"I asked. "It didn't have ears. Or eyes or a nose or a mouth. Because it didn't have a fucking head. Have you heard a word I'm saying?" "I am listening most attentively. This headless beast picked you up to clear a path to me?" "It didn't touch us,"the woman answered,"but we moved anyway. Everybody. We floated off the floor and out to the sides. Then the creature took away your body and when it brought you back, you were alive again." "But I was always alive. I am not so weak as to the from a little tumble." "You didn't look alive,"the woman said."But you got taken away and when you came back..." Generated by ABC Amber LIT Converter, http://www.processtext.com/abclit.html Her voice faded again. I gave her another smack against the wall."Wake up! Is it not interesting that I appeared dead but then was alive? Do you not wish to find this headless beast and learn the reasons for its actions? I am clearly enmeshed in Portentous Events and if you accompany me, we shall both... wake up! Wake up! Wake up!" I slapped her hard. She did not react. I lifted my hand to slap her again, but Uclod seized my wrist. "Enough, missy," he said. "You've knocked her out cold." I looked at the woman before me. She was beginning to slump to the floor—but not because I had battered her unconscious. I had not hit her hard enough to cause injury; in fact, I had not hit her hard enough to keep her awake. And through all this, none of the others within hearing had opened an eye to watch. Too lost to care. The woman had been the most awake of them all; but she had not been awake enough. Perhaps no one in this tower was. No one in this city. No one in the world. Uclod eased his grip on my wrist and took me by the hand instead. "Come on. Let's get out of here." I let him lead me away. 2: WHEREIN I BECOME AN IMPORTANT WITNESS Subterranean Snow Outside the tower, it was snowing. Only a few flakes trickled directly onto my shoulders, but many more were falling three blocks over. The snow came through a great hole in the roof. This city—and I do not know the city's true name, so I shall call it Oarville—was built within a gigantic cavern dug deep under a mighty mountain. The place seemed empty and abandoned now, except for thousands or even millions of Ancestors who slept in their great bright towers. Apart from those towers, all other lights had been damped down by the supervising machines that concern themselves with power consumption. The result was a permanent dusk, illuminated only by Ancestral Towers shining amidst the underground blackness. At one time, the whole cavern had been completely sealed off from the outside world; but then my friend Festina used Science to blow a great fissure in the stony roof so she could fly inside with an aeroplane. Although that happened four years before, the city's repair machines had not yet patched up the damage... which disturbed me very much indeed. The purpose of machines is to work automatically: to mend breakage and to shield people from the Harsh Cruel World. Here in Oarville, the Harsh Cruel World was enjoying free rein—a blizzard gusted with arctic ferocity through the mountains outside, and its thick showers of white spilled in through the roof's hole. Why had the damage not been fixed? Unless perhaps the city's repair machines were becoming as Tired as the people: lapsing into torpor like the woman in the tower. But I did not want to think such a thing—I