In It for the Long Haul IN IT FOR THE LONG HAUL Overcoming Burnout & Passion Fatigue as Social Justice Change Agents KATHY OBEAR NEW YORK NASHVILLE • MELBOURNE • VANCOUVER IN IT FOR THE LONG HAUL Overcoming Burnout & Passion Fatigue as Social Justice Change Agents © 2018 Kathy Obear All rights reserved. No portion of this book may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means—electronic, mechanical, photocopy, recording, scanning, or other—except for brief quotations in critical reviews or articles, without the prior written permission of the publisher. Published in New York, New York, by Morgan James Publishing. Morgan James is a trademark of Morgan James, LLC. www.MorganJamesPublishing.com The Morgan James Speakers Group can bring authors to your live event. For more information or to book an event visit The Morgan James Speakers Group at www.TheMorganJamesSpeakersGroup.com. ISBN 9781683508175 paperback ISBN 9781683508182 eBook Library of Congress Control Number: 2017916262 Front Cover Designer: Rachel Lopez Interior Design: Christopher Kirk Graphics For Success Studio In an effort to support local communities, raise awareness and funds, Morgan James Publishing donates a percentage of all book sales for the life of each book to Habitat for Humanity Peninsula and Greater Williamsburg. Get involved today! Visit www.MorganJamesBuilds.com Advance Praise “I felt deeply moved reading this book. As someone whose life work is committed to racial justice, I felt seen and understood. I also felt relieved, because Kathy goes beyond affirming that social justice work in this profoundly disturbing political climate is challenging; she offers the sustenance and focus needed for continuing. Now more than ever we cannot set this burden down, and Kathy offers a way to stay true to our convictions while also nurturing ourselves so that we might be as effective as possible. This isn’t about giving up or even taking a break—it’s about how to fight for justice from a position of internal strength. In the words of Mary Church Terrell, in her latest book, Kathy Obear yet again lifts as she climbs.” - Robin DiAngelo, PH.D., Author of White Fragility “Honest, insightful, challenging, and hopeful. That is what I feel after reading the latest inspiring work of Dr. Kathy Obear. For years, I have found her work to reach millions where no one else can, in the heart. For all who are feeling the stress and strain of social justice work, this is a must read, because giving up is not an option and Kathy won’t let you, instead she will inspire you.” - Eddie Moore, PH.D., Director/Founder, The Privilege Institute “Thank you Kathy Obear! Your insights and tools have breathed fresh life into me when I needed it most. Especially powerful is the understanding that when we all focus on our unique roles in the movement, and not try to be all things to all people, we not only sustain ourselves, we create a more vibrant and resilient movement. Humanity meets strategy. Brilliant!” - Debby Irving, Author of Waking Up White “Unfortunately, many of us can relate to burnout and passion fatigue. Fortunately, Kathy Obear has written a book that can really help! Filled with useful tools for self-reflection and restoring balance, In it for the Long Haul offers a vision and strategies for being more effective social justice activists without sacrificing our well- being.” - Diane Goodman, ED.D., Author of Promoting Diversity and Social Justice: Educating People from Privileged Groups “Another insightful resource from Kathy Obear that assists change agents searching for tools to get ‘unstuck’ and stay rejuvenated and focused in their journey toward making a difference in the world. Kathy’s reflections and personal journey serves as a model for how sustainable change can happen while we also have a joyful balanced life. This book helped me imagine what this world could look like if I brought as much vigilance to living with love and compassion for myself as I do justice work.” - Lisa Landreman, PH.D., editor of The Art of Effective Facilitation: Reflections from Social Justice Educators Obear’s insights about the factors contributing to burnout and strategies for incorporating effective self-care to prevent it are especially needed by social justice educators working to address the unprecedented challenges facing society following the election of 2016. This book is a must read for anyone who wants to lead a healthier life while creating transformative change in our world. - Nancy, Evans, PH.D., Author of Disability in Higher Education: A Social Justice Approach “Dr. Obear provides the necessary tools to ‘stay in it’ as she shares her own journey. Thank you for your insights and reminders of being true to ourselves in our passion to create change.” - becky martinez, ed.d., Infinity Martinez Consulting “At the core of social change must be the beat of sustainable people. To make meaningful social change for the long haul as change agents, we must take care of our whole selves, psyche, spirit and body and we must not let the care of self be sidelined until after the world is changed. This inspiring book does more than merely restore and underscore the agency of change makers, it is a soulful map for how to avoid burnout and passion fatigue to make meaningful social change for the long haul.” - Beth Applegate, Co-author of Embracing Cultural Competency in the nonprofit sector: A capacity builder’s guide “Teaching about oppression and social justice is never easy for both students and teachers. In It For The Long Haul: Overcoming Burnout and Passion Fatigue as Social Justice Change Agents speaks to me on how to deal honestly with my anxieties, assumptions and emotional responses in the teaching of anti-oppressive education. A valuable resource for everyone.” - Dennis Francis, PH.D., author of Troubling the Teaching and Learning of Gender and Sexuality Diversity in South African Education “Kathy Obear really gets what it means to run in the marathon of social change. She also gets how easy it is for this work to burn us out and how crucial it is that we not let that happen. Her supportive approach combines body, mind, spirit, and heart: the thoughts, feelings, and actions we can choose to keep us going. She’s skillful at coaching folks to shift our approach—things we can control—in ways that sustain us. And when we sustain ourselves, we can sustain the movement.” - Kat Morgan, ChangeAbility Solutions Also by Kathy Obear But I’m NOT Racist: Tools for Well-Meaning Whites Turn The Tide: Rise Above Toxic, Difficult Situations in the Workplace Dedication F or all the social justice change agents who have come before. I am deeply grateful, deeply humbled by your leadership, passion, persistence, and sacrifice so we may live in greater freedom and liberation. To all those who have picked up the mantle to move us onward, thank you. Together we can and together we will. Table of Contents Introduction Chapter 1 I Can Spot It, Cause I Got It: My story Chapter 2 Why Don’t We Take Care of Ourselves? Chapter 3 Warning Signs Chapter 4 Look Out For Backlash and Self-Sabotage Chapter 5 Tips and Tools to Add More Self-Care to Your Life Chapter 6 Creating More Self-Care From the Inside Out Chapter 7 What Do I Do If… Chapter 8 Conclusion Further Reading Acknowledgments About the Author Thank You