HowW eG rieve We Grieve How RelearntihneWg o rld REVISEDE DITION Thomas Attig OXFORD UNIVERSITPYR ESS 2011 OXFORD UNIVERSITYP RESS OxforUdn iversPirteys s OxforNde w York AthensA ucklanBda ngkokB ombay CalcuttCaa peT own DaresS alaamN ew Delhi FlorenHcoen gK ong IstanbKualr achi KualLau mpurM adrasM adridM elbourne MexicCoi tyN airobPia riSs ingapore TaipeTio kyoT oronto anda ssociactoemdp aniienBs e rlIibna dan Copyrig©h 1t996,2 011b yO xforUdn ivetrysP iresIsn,c . PublisbhyeO dx forUdn iversPirteysI sn,c ., 198M adisoAnv enuNee,w YorkN,e w Yor1k0 016 Oxforidsa r egistterraedde maorfOk x forUdn iversPirteys s Allr ighrtess ervNeod p.a rotft hipsu blication mayb er eproduscteodr,ie nda r etriesvyaslt eomr,t ransmitted, ina nyf ormor b ya nym eanse,l ectromneicch,a nical, photocopyriencgo,r doirno gt,h erwiwsiet,h otuhtep rior permissoifOo xnf orUdn iversPirteys s. 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Those wrtiinagrsme y b esatt temtpoct osn tribute ctoond sitsr­uctively cussioofcn osm plicgaritdeeifdns, fe nrcahigsreeid,fl ososft he assumpwtoirvlmede ,a ngi-nmakiingn rgi ceofn,nt uiigbn ondasn,­ tiicpaytg orrievgirniagen,fed x istesnuftfeiraiilnnc g h ildarnedn , respegtc htseip niritoufta hlbeier tevyae d. Ia lsoof fceorm mnetaornys eveortahlie srs uiencs o ntempo­ rardyiu sscs.iT ohnesienl cudree lgiiree,ftf heefe fctivoefng eresifs counisnelgli, mitatainoadnn as p porfao tpaerg ienfdorare asrecihn thfiee ld, teofd feovretalsg o rpei fc ategfoorry incilntu hsei on DSMt,h fiev e-gsett haoeroyfg rei,ft htea smko deolfg rievtihneg , dual-prmoocdeeoslfgs r ieveimnapgt,h fiaci lnuarrer,a ettihviec s viii Prefcaet ot heR eivseEdd ition anrde spegic ntdiinvtiyds,uh atiligfine mphaosnei mso tainvde cog­ nitaisvpee ocfgt resiv inrge,s ilainecdnl csoeu,.r e Ih avceo mteo a pprectihiaetm peo rtdainstt inbcettiwoene n grireefta icoann gdr ievrienosgnp sWee.r eletahrweno rlidng reif reactaiswo enp sa ssitvaekilenty h ree iatlioefcs h anignoe u wro rld thabte reavemenitn ucedlnittnahgile lo sso,sfw holenaenssdso r­ rowt hacto moev eurs A.n dw er eelartnh weo rlidng reivirneg­ sposnea sw ea ctivceolmtyeo t ermwsi tthh ecshea ngienos u r woralndrd e negaignet hfelu lnoefsl esi .Ifs trgersise rviensgp onse int hbeo obke caoutshete rrem aetntosfg rieveiintghn eerg lietc t altogoerti hneard equateltyh ed elosafcgb rroeiirvbsie n g. 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Ih avceo mteou saev ocabuolfea grosy,o l ua,n sdp itroifl te sh oumty u nderstgo afnt dhniean tuorfte h see alsfi ti se mbodied in aw ebo fc argie nngamgeentisnt hweo rdl.Ie tn albemse itdoe infty the asnosdup li arsti hte deepw itfohritcnhe asut s wewaveeb s the ofo udra illeiyp f attearnnrdse w eatvheec mo ntinuionutosoul ry leis ftioerIsta. l wlsom et od escrhiobwte h sero rotwh acto mes oveurs giirner fe actiinocnl undoeotsn ltyh hee lpleosfso nuers s