February The Fifth - The First Glothic Tale

(The trilogy of 'The Glothic Tales' is now available on Kindle in one huge ebook. Search for 'The Glothic Tales' and get all three books at a discount.)

February The Fifth
A young fool becomes king and quickly discovers he has some very nasty enemies. Particularly the ones who are shooting at him.

In a remarkable turn of events, a young man with a lot definitely not going for him, somehow manages to come to terms with a startling reality. He has to grow up. Being handicapped by not only having rather nasty acne and an odd eye impediment, he also has to suffer the fact that his name is February. Or at best, Feb to his very limited number of friends.

While not at all wishing to rush into this startling new reality, circumstances and a few elbow nudges from his very protective elder sister ensure that his ‘not at all wishing’ turns out to be a complete waste of time. Thrust totally and altogether unwillingly into a position of authority by early afternoon, February finds himself with a new appendage tacked on to the end his name.

The Fifth. The new and very authoritative part of his name.

Of course, as is the case in all such rapid and thrusting types of promotion to positions of power, there will be those who are not happy about it. In February’s case however, he finds that in fact these those amount to just about everyone apart from his three sisters.

Undaunted by this reality, Feb accepts his new responsibility and by early evening sets about getting himself into a real tangle. His only true achievement being that he discovers that quite a few of these those who weren’t so happy, are in fact really very upset about the whole Fifth appendage deal. By bedtime, he thinks he is in trouble.

Before lunchtime the next day, he is sure.

The Glothic Tales Trilogy: February The Fifth is the first book in the Glothic Tales trilogy and is followed by HAL in book two and Septimity in book three. Enjoy all three comic science fiction adventures or search for 'The Glothic Tales' to get all three books in one Kindle ebook.

'Douglas Adams has reincarnated and is living in Switzerland with wife and dog. Of course he has a new name these days. It's Derek Haines.'
--Jack Eason - Author Onet's Tale

'Derek's attention to plotting and characterisation soon had me hooked and I truly wanted to know what happened to Feb and his sisters,...' --Nettie Thomson - Words and Pictures

'Derek has a great sense of comic timing in this book and captures character extremely well. The twists and turns of the plot kept me reading right up to the last page.' --Vincent - Amazon Reader

'Derek Haines manages to deftly skewer political manoeuvring and/or family dysfunction/backstabbing, while telling an exciting story about a hapless underachiever who's forced to suddenly grow up and take responsibility....' --Debbi -The Book Grrl

An author of fiction, historical fiction, essays and poetry, Derek Haines writes his books from a view of what fascinates him and not from a formula based on one theme or genre. Starting with poetry before moving into essays and fiction novels, his writing is varied but is always written in a style and voice that communicates with, and engages his readers. 

Most of all, the stories told by Derek Haines are about people, their feelings, regrets, hopes and struggles with life. Ordinary people, but with extraordinary qualities that makes their story worth telling. With splashes of sometimes black humour or simple satire, his stories can develop from the simplistic to the complex and back again leaving the reader to decide if it is time to laugh or cry. Or both.

Born in Australia, but now living in Switzerland with his wife and a black cocker spaniel, his stories cross a wide geographical range but often draw from elements of his life and experiences in the two countries he calls home. From the rugged, dry and hot desert country of Australia and its crowded cities to the cafés of Europe and the peaks of the Swiss Alps. The hustle and bustle of Sydney to the quiet life of the Swiss countryside.

When not writing, he is usually doing what he equally enjoys. Teaching English.