DOCUMENT RESUME PS 023 313 ED 462 133 Ensminger, Karen, Ed.; Hockey, Amy, Ed.; Mangigian, Lisa AUTHOR Ed.; Warren, Mitzi, Ed.; Eisenlord, Terri, Ed. Offspring: The Magazine of the Michigan Council of TITLE Cooperative Nursery Schools, 1994. Illinois Professional Development Partnership Center, INSTITUTION Bloomington. ISSN-0472-6340 ISSN 1994-00-00 PUB DATE 74p.; Published twice yearly. NOTE MCCN/Offspring, 8085 Hurron River Dr., Dexter, MI 48130 AVAILABLE FROM (1-year, $6; 2-years, $10). Collected Works Serials (022) PUB TYPE Offspring; v36 n1-2 1994 JOURNAL CIT MF01/PC03 Plus Postage. EDRS PRICE Attention Deficit Disorders; *Caregiver Child Relationship; DESCRIPTORS Child Development; Child Rearing; Clothing; *Cooperation; *Day Care; Early Childhood Education; Grief; Listening Skills; *Nursery Schools; *Parent Child Relationship; Parent School Relationship; Periodicals; Preschool Children; Reading Attitudes; School Readiness; Verbal Abuse *Cooperative Preschools; Fire Safety Education; Firesetters; IDENTIFIERS Independent Behavior ABSTRACT "Offspring" is a magazine for parents, teachers, and others, intended to provide a forum for views on dealing with young children, to express a variety of ideas, to promote the co-op philosophy, and to enhance the relationship of members of these groups with children and with each other. This document contains issues 1 and 2 from 1994. The first issue presents six articles on the following topics: (1) understanding one's place in the family (an interview with Sister Karen Hawver); (2) promoting independence in preschool children; (3) helping children go to school for the (5) raising children to be (4) helping children deal with death; first time; readers; and (6) observing a young girl's changing flair for fashion. The second issue presents five articles on the following topics: (1) working in (2) dealing with children with Attention Deficit co-operative nurseries; Disorder (ADD) or Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD); (3) teaching children to listen the first time; (4) learning from counseling by a firefighter; and (5) learning about the effects of verbal abuse on children. (AP) Reproductions supplied by EDRS are the best that can be made from the original document. U.S. DEPARTMENT OF EDUCATION Office of Educational Research and Improvernent PERMISSION TO REPRODUCE AND EDUCATIONAL RESOURCES INFORMATION DISSEMINATE THIS MATERIAL HAS .0 CENTER (ERIC) BEEN GRANTED BY O This document has been reproduced as received from the person or organization originating it. ""t" O Minor changes have been made to improve reproduction quality. Points of view or opinions stated in this TO THE EDUCATIONAL RESOURCES document do not necessarily represent INFORMATION CENTER (ERIC) official OERI position or policy. 1 Offspring The Magazine of the Michigan Council of Cooperative Nursery Schools, 1994 Karen Ensminger, Amy Hockey, Lisa Mangigian, Mitzi Warren, and Terri Eisen lord, Editors Volume 36, Numbers 1-2 AVAILABLE COPY BEST 1 iik14G 94.` So' A oc:4 oo oi °f4 14.c Vve C531*% 000As clietze>veS__olse:, <7,r, Offspring Magazine is published twice yearly. Articles reflect opinions of the authors and not necessarily the editorial board and staff. Manuscripts are accepted for consideration. Subscription to this magazine is through membership in the Michigan Council of Cooperative Nursery Schools or through individual subscriptions. For subscription information, see inside back cover. MCCN does not discriminate on the basis of race, color, national or ethnic origin. EDITORIAL BOARD John Bernardo, M.A., Detroit Public Schools Psychologist and Psychotherapist Carole Grates, Child Day Care Licensing Consultant Anne Cairns Federlein, Ph.D., Dean of Behavioral and Applied Sciences, State University of New York at Oneota Sally L. Fee, M.A., Birmingham Public Schools, Kindergarten Teacher Joseph Fischhoff, M.D., Child Psychiatrist Dan Hodgins, M.A., Early Childhood Coordinator, Mott Community College Donna Howe, M.A., Michigan State University Maijorie M. Kunz, M.A., MCCN Advisor Ginny McCaig, M.A., University of Michigan-Dearborn Marilynn Rosenthal, Ph.D., Founding Editor Jacquelyn Thompson, M.A., Early Childhood Consultant Michigan Department of Education Kathy Brown, President, MCCN EDITORIAL STAFF Karen Ensminger Lisa Mangigian Mitzi Warren Amy Hockey Offspring is written for parents, teachers and others: To provide a forum for views on dealing with young children; CI To express a variety of ideas; To promote the co-op philosophy; To enhance our relationships with children and each other. Michigan Council of Cooperative Nursery Schools is a member of Parent Cooperative Preschools International. Copyright © 1994 by the Michigan Council of Cooperative Nursery Schools. All rights reserved. Published in Ann Arbor, Michigan, United States of America. ISSN: 0472-6340 3 OFFSPRING THE MAGAZINE OF THE MICHIGAN COUNCIL OF COOPERATIVE NURSERY SCHOOLS Vol. XXXVI No. 1 Place in the Family: An Interview with 2 Lisa Mangigian Sister Karen Hawver I'll Do It MYSELF! Promoting Independence In 7 Anne Soderman Preschool Children Saddened By Death 13 Jerre Cory 19 Emily Miller Going to School Raising a Reader: An Interview with 22 Debra Fitzgerald Karen Paciorek 28 Sue Mikan A Flair For Fashion MERL , 'If ii I. " " ' ; 4 " , Place in the Family An Interview with Sister Karen Hawver LISA MANGIGIAN Sister Karen Hawver, S.C., Principal of Holy Family Ele- mentary School in Rochester, Michigan, will be the keynote speaker at the MCCN Conference in April. Her area of exper- tise is place in the family. Sister Karen received her B.S. in Education at Mount St. Joseph College and her M.A. in Education specializing in Elementary School Counseling from DePaul University. She has had 14 years experience as an elementary school counselor. For the past 15 years, Sister Karen has also been teaching adults a series entitled, Understanding yourself and your child. Lisa Mangigian is an editor for Offspring, a co-op parent, and has just given birth to her third child! 1994: No. 1 3 6 Offspring: Sister Karen, when you speak of place in the family are you referring to birth order? Sr. Karen: Yes. Offspring: What sparked your interest in this area? Sr. Karen: I did my master's thesis on Counseling of Children. Since 1975 as I have worked with families and children I have noticed certain behaviors, and I began to conclude that they were typical. Throughout the years I have been collecting articles and done more research. I find this topic fascinating. Offspring: Could you please briefly explain the concept of birth order? Sr. Karen: A child's place in the family is the basis for his. or her security. A child's perception often differs from that of the parents. Problems occur when there is this clash in percep- tions. For instance, a younger child may be convinced that he will never measure up to the eldest child. His behaviDr then will reflect this perception, and unfortunately his feelings and difficulties may continue on to adulthood. Offspring: How does a child's unique personality figure into the place in the family theory? Sr. Karen: Parenting and environment make the differ- ence. For example, even a mild-mannered introverted first child will have the typical characteristics of being independent and intelligent even though these qualities may be expressed much differently from the way a more outgoing child would behave. Offspring: Would you please comment on the second child. Sr. Karen: Second children learn to be different from the first child. If the first child is shy or reserved the second child will usually be outgoing. Often the second child perceives that his parents want him to be just like his older sibling. This results in much anger with the child's attitude being, "I'll be testing you to see if you'll withdraw your love." Offspring: Where does the third child fit into the family scenario? Sr. Karen: The third child is the best adjusted, happiest, and most sincere. The third child in a family is very adaptable and usually has good relationships with her older siblings whom often don't like each other. The third child has the 4 OFFSPRING 7 ability to see the good in situations and people. Unfortunately, the third child feels that her opinion doesn't count, but all in all I would still say that the third child occupies the perfect place in the family. Offspring: Is there a perfect number of children for a family? Sr. Karen: NO! Offspring: Do you notice more sibling rivalry when there are two children vying for parental attention, or is competition just as strong in large families? Sr. Karen: It is strongest in families with two children, especially when they are the same sex. Offspring: What are some characteristics of children from large families? Sr. Karen: These children are happy with small things. Their best friends are usually members of their own family. Often the youngest children have a special relationship with one of their older siblings. In general, they are very adaptable. Usually, there is one child the parents worry about the most. Offspring: How has your study of place in the family been incorporated into your work as a principal? Sr. Karen: I find that parents are usually eager for advice and encouragement in raising their children. Children often draw conclusions that parents do not intend to give them. Sometimes I can help parents deal with their children's per- ceptions and guide the families towards resolutions of con- flicts. Offspring: Whose body of research have you found to be the most helpful in the field of birth order? Sr. Karen: Alfred Adler is my all-time favorite. He is a psychotherapist who dealt with depressed patients. He found that the problems that people came to him with were only superficial. Most often the root causes of their depression had to do with perceptions received in their childhoods relating to their place in the family. Offspring: What advice would you give to someone who came to you for counseling relating to place in the family problems? Sr. Karen: Don't carry the heavy burdens of your child- hood. I would point out the present reality: what good is it now 1994: No. 1 5 to continue having negative feelings or participating in self-de- feating behavior? Children do not have to be slotted in certain places, and they can change as they mature into adulthood. I would point out that most parents do the best job they can. Sometimes adult children need to forgive their parents and then go on with their lives. - _ 6 OFFSPRING