DOCUMENT RESUME O SO 008 799 BD 11'6 983* . Scholz, Nelle Tumlin; And Others AUTHOR How to Decide: A Guide for Women. TITLE College Entrance Examination Board, New York, N.Y. INSTITUTION PUB DATE 75 NOTE 126p. AVAILABLE FROM College Bbard Publication Orders, Box 2815, (Princeton, New Jersey 08540 ($5.95, 20 percent discount on five or morel MF-$0476 Plus Postage. HC Not Available from EDRS. EDRS PRICER Career Eiploration; *Career Planning; Class DESCRIPTORS Activities; *Decision Making; Higher Education; Instr ctional Materials; Resource Materials; Role It .Confli t; Secondary Education; Sex Discrimination; Sex Role; Sex Stereotypes; *Social Sthdies Units; *Values; *Womens Studies ABSTRACT. Designed to meet the changing needs of women by increasing their decision-making ability, thisbook provides practical exercises and activities which develop and clarify decision-making skills. In additione'it seeks to develop a lAoader. concept of women's roles and emerging life patterns, to awaken,women to the spectrum of new possibilities opening to them, and to serve as a catalyst for purposeful planning by women. Chapter. 1, Wheeg Are You as a Woman, examines traditional attitudes and ideas which society 7- holds about women. Chapter 2, Who Are You, provides questions and exercises to examine individual values, abilities, interestse'and special talents in order to understand how one coAn use this knowledge in moving-toward life gbals. Chapter 3, What YoNeed toAnow, pretents questions and exercises which develop knowledge of infdrmation sources in order to make the most advantageous decisions. Chapter 4, How Do You Take Action, furnisheb questions and exercises which set up a program for action in developing alternative career possibilities. Lists of related readings and loc women's resource centers are also included. (Author/DE) . e- *********************************************************4********** Documents acquired by ERIC include many informal unpublished * materials not available from other seurces. ERIC makes every effort * * to obtain the best copy available. Nevertheless, items of marginal * * reproducibility are often encountered'and this affects the quality * of the microfiche and hardcopy reproductions EWC Makes available * * via the ERIC Document Reproduction Service (Epps). Epps iS not * * responsible for the quality of the original document. Reproductions * * supplied by EDRS are the best that can be made frclm the origin.al. ******1c**************************************************************** 1 0 O A guide for Women Nel le Tumlin Scholz Coordinator, Care& Counseling Center, University of Georgia, Athens, Georgia Judith Sosebee Prince Director of Counseling, Office of Student Affairs, Wesleyan College, Macon, Georgia Gordon Porter Miller - Progrann Service Officer, Decision-Making Program, College Entrance Examination Board a HEALTH. U S DEPARTMENT OF EDUCATION & WELFARE 0 NATIONAL INSTITUTE OF EDUCATION REPRO- CIA!' '1; THIS DOCUMENT HAS BEEN g CO FROM .. DUCED EXACTLY AS RECEIVED ORGANIZATION ORIGIN. I Si C./ G THE PERSON OR OPINIONS ATING IT POINTS OF VIEW OR REPRE- STATED DO NOT NECESSARILY INSTITUTE OF SENT OFFICIAL NATIONAL POSITION OR POLICY ad/ i College Btitrance Examination Board, New York, 1975 The College Entrance'Examination Board is a nonprofit member- ship organization that provides tests and other educational services for students, schools, and colleges. The membership is composed of - more than 2,000 colleges, schools, school systems, and education associations. Representatives of the members serve on the Board of Trustees and advisory councils and committees that consider the Board's programs and participate in the determination of its policies and activities. Copies of this book may be ordered from College Board Publication Orders, Box 2815, Princeton, New Jersey 08540. The price is $5.95. Editorial inquiries concerning this book should be directed to Editorial Office, College Entrance Examination Board, 888 Seventh Avenue, New York, New , York 10019. Copyright © 1975 by College Entrance Examination Board. All rights reserved. Library of Congress Catalog`Card Number: 75-35474 Printed in the United States of America. PERMISSION TO .17 EPRODUCE THIS COPYRIGHTED MATERIAL EY MICRO. FICHE ONLY HAS BEEN GRANTED BY 77.7-k1 AND ORGAN14r4 iNC. UNDER AGREEMENTS WITH THE NA TIONAL INSTITUTE OF EDUCATION F tit/ 'NEP REPRODUCTION OUTSIDE THE ERIC SYSTEM .REAUIRES PERMIS SION OF THE COPYRIGHT OWNER tl b A A Conter* iv Acknowledgments Foreword 1 2 Where are you as a woman? Who are you? 14 , 42 What do you need to know9 How do you take action? 78 107 Bibliography Women's centers: Where are they? 110 Photo credits 121 Cl c'i o 4 V Acknowledgments 4 Hon: to Decide: A Guide for Women grew o t of a concern for and an attempt to meet the needs of women with who wcpave worked over the years. We gratefully acknowledge those women who have shared their lives and decisions with us and whose enthusiasm, suppot, and contributions of ideas and personal case histories helped make this book possible. We acknowledge the members of the 1973-74 Parthenian Chapter of Mortar Board at the university of Georgia who worked with the first two authors in developing materials for a peer-counseling program on career decision-making for college Werfnen, some adaptations of which have been incorporated in this book. Subsequent Mortar Board chapters at the University of Georgia and at Wesleyan College have contributed their ideas as they have used the materials in peer-counseling,sessions. We wish to acknowledge the influence of Patricia Jakubowski-Spector's workshops and concepts in developing the section on assertiveness as a strategy. We wish to thank H. B. Gelatt, Barbara Varenhorst, and Richard Carey for their pioneering work in the field of decision-making, which served as the springboard for this publication. We are indebted to Anne Marken, a career intern from Colgate University, for he? very useful research. Our thanks also to the College Entrance Examination Board, especially Patricia A. Wyatt, Program Service ()filter for the Decision- Making Program, for her many helpful suggestions for improving the manuscript; and Marcia Van Meter, Managing Editor, for her expert \ editorial assistance.. ..,,,&special word of appreciation goes to our families who felt that our decision to spend time on this book was a good one. 4. N.T.S. J.S.P. G.P.M. r 6 Foreword How to LOA women A guide for is about a difficult subject: learning how to make decisions. Making decisions is ndt easy for most people, especially when those decisions are important to the individual involved. Yet our world of change and uncertainty demands that we make choices, and good ones. Women, especially, have experienced rather rapid change in society; new freedoms, new roles, new values have A offered new possibilities to women and have created new needs for them as well. This book is designed to meet the changing needs of women by increasing their decision-making ability and by helping them apply the dynamics of decision-making to planning their lives in a world of broadening and different opportunities and expectations An addition, How to Decide seeks'to develop a broader concept of women's roles and emerging life pattehs, to awaken women to the spectrum of new possibilities opening to them, and to serve as a catalyst for purposeful plarthing by women. How to Decide is appropriate for women of all ages, from college through retirement, but it is especially appropriate for women who are trying to make their lives more constructive and satisfying. The exercises and activities in this book are generally drawn from actual life experiences, and they will be most helpful to readers who become \--.actively involved and complete a wide variety of them. How to Decide: A Guide for Women has been used effectively in both individual and group settings. The authors will welcome any comments or suggestions readers might have regarding any aspect of this book. e r a e r e h T 1 se What, then; might the American woman become? Who be? We might become what- can she be? Who will she whatever we have the wis- ever we want to become, dom, the strength, the courage, and the fortitude to choose to be. We will become. We can be-whoever we O. , be whoever we develop ourselves into being. M. Louise McBee and Kathryn A. Blake, 1974 "Helmer: Before all else you are a wife and "I'd like to see the day when a mediocre woman can go'as far as a mediocre man." mother." Bernice Sandler, /972 "Nora: That I no, longer believe. I believe that' before all else I am a human being. Just "A woman is to be from her house three times: as you areor at least that should try when she is baptized, when she is married, and to become one." 0 when she is buried." Henrik Ibsen, 1879 Thomas Fuller, /732 "A woman should he seen, not heard." "Woman may be said to be an inferior man." Sophocles, Aristotle "Woman's destiny is not just to be attractive, to "Not all ,women want to he astronauts, but be able to find a smart, rich husbapd, and to be neither do all women want to be housewives a good housewife and mother. She can be all of and 'or secretaries." these if she chooses to be. But first and foremost impact, 1974 she is a person, and she should be treated like -,one. As a person, she atso has the responsibility "A bright woman is caught in a double bind. In to acquire maximum potential and self - actualize; testing and other achievement-oriented situa- tion. The process' of defining herself and her tions she worries not only about failure, but also identity is her own resp6n5ibility and should-not about success. If she fails, she is not living up to be'exclusively dictated by society and its expec- her own standards of performance; if she suc- tations, although society can set some guide- ceeds she is not living up to societal expectations lines."- about the female role." Vijay Sharma, 1974 Matina Horner, /969 "I do pray, and that most honestly and con- "But even if all discrimination were to end to- sistently, for some terrific shock to startle the morrow, nothing very drastic would change. For job discrimination is only part of the problem. women of the nation into a self-respect which It does impede women who choose to become will compel them to see the absolute degrada- Pawyers or managers or physicians. But it does tion of their present position; which will com- pel them to break their yoke or bondage and got, by itself, help us understand why so many or nurses to he secretaries *omen 'choose' give them faith in themsehies; which will make That or physicians. than rather executives them proclaim their allegiance to women.. . . 'something' is an unconscious ideology about The fact is, women are in chains and their servi- the nature of to female sex, an ideology which tude is all the more debasing because they do not constricts the emerging self-image of the female realize it. 0 to compel them to see and feel and child and tire nature of her aspiratioffs from the to give them the courage and consciousness to "homogenization" of Ameri- . The very first. !speak and act for their own freedom, though . . ca's women is the major consequence of our sex- they face the scorn and contempt of all the role ideology." world fOr doing it!" Sandra L. Bern and Daryl I. Bern, /973 Anthofix, /872 Susan B. . 3 If Making decisions is commonplace for all of us. you don't Some of us make them more consciously and systematitally than others. Some of us have confidence in our skills in decision-making, and decide, others -find it difficult to make even the most trivial choices. Some people are not aware of many of the choices:they could make, and some you've feel better letting others make choices for them. Regardless"Sf how you make choices or how you feel about making choices, your decisions made determine your future. A decision is an act, and in taking or choosing a specific action, an indi- vidual iNequired to make a commitment of a choice personal resources that cannot be replaced. The resources committed might involve time, money, a personal relationship, a career, a style of life, or even a strongly held belief.A decision might be painful, pleasaint, or anxiety-produc- ing, or it might relieve a troubling situation. A decision can be and do all these things, but most of all it means taking action. It means getting off. the fence. It can be a way to move you toward what you want or what is important to you and give you control and freedom over your life. In today's world and in the future everyone will be called on to make more choices as changes evolve in an advanced technological society Perhaps no one will be more aware of the implications of increased options than the American woman who is exploring and testing new roles and opportunities that heretofore have been unavailable to her or that she has found unacceptable. The woman of today has been .thrust into a new set of conditions that have great implications for her personal, educa- tional, and career life. As is true for anyone fac- ing new and important choices, this situation is likely to cause anxieties. Although the freedom to choose may be clearbt.;appmnt to a person, the ability to choose may-nOt be so apparent. e, Indeed, most people, men or women, old or young, have had little help in learning how to make well-informed, well-considered choices. The problem of acquiring skill in making falecisions is especially acute for women. Many women are not aware of 'the choices open to them. They may feel anxious, confused, uneasy, or frustrated because their experiences have not prepared them for deciding, And even when they have learned how to make effective deci- sions they may not be able to take action unless others approve. A woman who is anxious about the very notion of making a decision is hardly in a position to take advantage of newly avail- able options relating to her education, her career, and her life. It is the purport of this book to help women learn decision-making skills so that any uncer- tainties they may have about making choices can be reduced and any anxiety they may asso- ciate with decision-making can be lessened. The decision-making process you will follow in these pages can apply to any decision, whether it is personal or. whether it relates to your career. The word "career" as used in this book refers to you to take action. Like many others who have lifelong learning, living, and working experi- learn to\ learned to use the decision-making process, you ences. The book is intended to help y may. find greater freedom in your life and learn out of use what you know to get what you wa ways to develop greater control over what you life, whether you are a student, a business execu- tive, a housewife, aa.artist, a motheror some do and what you plan to do in the future. A good beginning in gaining greater freedom combination of these. of choice and control over your life is to ex- In other words, this book is directed to you, amine some of your attitudes toward yourself a unique individual. It is based on the idea that 'and toward other women and what effect these people whs§tlearn to decide effectively can direct attitudes are having on you. For example, what their lives effectively. It can help you to focus do you think a woman should be? How binding on what is really important to you, it can teach or important to you are some of the stereotypes you how to evaluate and use inforniation in about women? The self-evaluation in the fol- making your decisions, it can provide you with lowing pages can help you confront your image some techniques by which you can identify and of appropriate "feminine behavior. explore new alterpativesand it can encourage it I 5