Business NLP FOR DUMmIES ‰ Business NLP FOR DUMmIES ‰ by Lynne Cooper A John Wiley and Sons, Ltd, Publication Business NLP For Dummies© Published by John Wiley & Sons, Ltd The Atrium Southern Gate Chichester West Sussex PO19 8SQ England E-mail (for orders and customer service enquires): [email protected] Visit our Home Page on www.wiley.com Copyright © 2008 John Wiley & Sons, Ltd, Chichester, West Sussex, England Published by John Wiley & Sons, Ltd, Chichester, West Sussex All Rights Reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, scanning or otherwise, except under the terms of the Copyright, Designs and Patents Act 1988 or under the terms of a licence issued by the Copyright Licensing Agency Ltd, Saffron House, 6-10 Kirby Street, London EC1N 8TS, UK, without the permission in writing of the Publisher. 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British Library Cataloguing in Publication Data: A catalogue record for this book is available from the British Library ISBN: 978-0-470-69757-3 Printed and bound in Great Britain by Bell & Bain Ltd., Glasgow 10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1 About the Author Lynne Cooper facilitates organisational change and leadership development. With extensive business and management experience, she uses NLP to help business leaders bring about fast and sustainable change for themselves and their organisations. Lynne specialises in developing leadership skills and improving team working to maximise performance, working one-to-one, and with groups. Lynne is an NLP Master Practitioner, a certifi ed Clean Facilitator and an accredited coach. She is director of Change Perspectives and a busi- ness trainer with PPD Learning Ltd. Author’s Acknowledgements I, like so many others, owe a huge debt of gratitude to the originators of NLP, Richard Bandler and John Grinder and the many other NLP developers who have contributed so much to the fi eld – Judith DeLozier, Lesley Cameron Bandler, Robert Dilts to name only a few. As a result of their work people, businesses and communities are achieving so much more – this book is just one example of these achievements. Business NLP For Dummies is based very much on my own experience of taking NLP into organisations to improve individual and business perfor- mance. That would never have been possible without learning from, and being supported by, some of the most outstanding trainers in the fi eld. Particular mention must go to Judith Lowe, James Lawley and Penny Tompkins. Special thanks too to my dear friend and colleague, Mariette Castellino, from whom I have learned so much, and all those clients who had faith in the difference that working with us could make. Thanks to the team at Wiley, including Simon, Sally and Nicole, for guiding and supporting me through the writing of this book, and to Chris for his dili- gent and knowledgeable contributions. Particular thanks to Brian Kramer, whose insights and incisive questions added so much to the end result. Many thanks to friends and family for their forbearance. They’ve been sorely neglected, but much loved, through the process of writing this book. And last but not least, thanks to Glen, Victoria and Chelsey, who have encouraged, supported and nurtured me with tea and cake in the long hours of writing. Publisher’s Acknowledgments We’re proud of this book; please send us your comments through our Dummies online registration form located at www.dummies.com/register/. Some of the people who helped bring this book to market include the following: Acquisitions, Editorial, and Media Composition Services Development Project Coordinator: Linsey Stanford Acquisitions Editor: Nicole Hermitage Layout and Graphics: Reuben W. Davis, Publishing Assistant: Jennifer Prytherch Sarah Philippart Development Editor: Simon Bell Proofreader: Susan Moritz Content Editor: Jo Theedom Indexer: Claudia Bourbeau Copy Editor: Sally Osborn Technical Editor: Chris Howell Publisher: Jason Dunne Executive Editor: Samantha Spickernell Executive Project Editor: Daniel Mersey Cover Photos: © Tetra Images / Alamy Cartoons: Rich Tennant (www.the5thwave.com) Publishing and Editorial for Consumer Dummies Diane Graves Steele, Vice President and Publisher, Consumer Dummies Joyce Pepple, Acquisitions Director, Consumer Dummies Kristin A. Cocks, Product Development Director, Consumer Dummies Michael Spring, Vice President and Publisher, Travel Kelly Regan, Editorial Director, Travel Publishing for Technology Dummies Andy Cummings, Vice President and Publisher, Dummies Technology/General User Composition Services Gerry Fahey, Vice President of Production Services Debbie Stailey, Director of Composition Services Contents at a Glance Introduction ................................................................ 1 Part I: The Difference That Makes the Difference ........... 7 Chapter 1: Achieving Business Excellence with NLP ....................................................9 Chapter 2: Overcoming the Barriers to Success ..........................................................23 Chapter 3: Utilising NLP Principles at Work .................................................................37 Part II: Building Working Relationships That Work ...... 51 Chapter 4: Understanding More, Achieving More through Communication ...........53 Chapter 5: Making Sense of Other People for Better Infl uence ..................................69 Chapter 6: Building Rapport: The Heart of Successful Relationships .......................87 Chapter 7: Using Words to Get Results .......................................................................109 Chapter 8: Choosing and Anchoring Positive Emotions ...........................................135 Part III: Leading People to Perform ........................... 155 Chapter 9: Leading from Within: Managing Your Emotions .....................................157 Chapter 10: Inspiring and Motivating with Artfully Vague Language......................179 Chapter 11: Giving Feedback to Fuel Improvement ..................................................201 Chapter 12: Coaching for Peak Performance .............................................................215 Chapter 13: Handling Diffi cult People .........................................................................237 Part IV: Achieving Business Excellence ...................... 251 Chapter 14: Creating a Compelling Vision ..................................................................253 Chapter 15: Maximising Success through Change .....................................................271 Chapter 16: Setting and Achieving Goals ....................................................................287 Chapter 17: Modelling Winning Performance ............................................................303 Part V: The Part of Tens ........................................... 323 Chapter 18: Ten Business Benefi ts of NLP ..................................................................325 Chapter 19: Ten Tips for Using NLP in Business .......................................................331 Chapter 20: Ten Online NLP Resources ......................................................................335 Chapter 21: Ten Great Reads to Build Your Business NLP Library .........................339 Index ...................................................................... 343