Advocating for LGBTQ Student Rights in the Mississippi Delta Resource Guide An Education Resource Guide produced by the Nollie Jenkins Family Center and the ACLU of Mississippi A dvocating for LGBTQ Student Rights in the Mississippi Delta Illustration Created by Nollie Jenkins Family Center Youth 1 | P a g e Advocating for LGBTQ Student Rights in the Mississippi Delta Education Resource Guide October 2015 Table of Contents Introduction: Why do we need LGBT curricula in the Mississippi Delta? ............................................................. 4 I. Definitions: Importance of Maintaining an Updated, Respectful and Appropriate Vocabulary .................. 5 II. Understanding and Respecting Gender Pronouns ..................................................................................... 10 III. Reclaimed Language ................................................................................................................................... 12 IV. Guidelines for Respecting LGBT Students .............................................................................................. 13 V. Becoming an Ally ........................................................................................................................................ 14 VI. Addressing Contrary Beliefs ................................................................................................................... 16 VII. Understanding the Rights of LGBT Students .......................................................................................... 17 a. Right to be Free of Harassment.............................................................................................................. 17 b. Right to form a GSA ................................................................................................................................ 19 c. Right to Privacy ....................................................................................................................................... 20 d. Right to Freedom of Speech and Expression .......................................................................................... 21 e. Right to Attend Prom, Homecoming, and Other School Events ............................................................ 22 f. Rights of LGBT Youth Who Are Incarcerated ......................................................................................... 23 g. Right to Be Transgender or Transitioning Gender in School .................................................................. 24 VIII. Inequalities of Care for LGBT Students................................................................................................... 25 a. Harassment ............................................................................................................................................ 25 b. Dating Violence ...................................................................................................................................... 26 c. Exile ........................................................................................................................................................ 27 d. Criminalization........................................................................................................................................ 28 e. Suicide .................................................................................................................................................... 28 IX. Advancing the Rights of LGBT Students ..................................................................................................... 29 a. What Can You Do as a Parent or Community Member? ........................................................................ 29 b. How Can You Encourage Schools to Support all Students? ................................................................... 30 X. Resources for LGBT Students ..................................................................................................................... 31 XI. Model Letters ............................................................................................................................................. 33 a. Letter to School Officials about Addressing Anti-LGBT Harassment and Bullying ................................. 34 b. Letter Urging Adoption of Policies Prohibiting Anti-LGBT Harassment and Bullying ............................. 36 c. Letter to Principals and Superintendents about Boys Being Prevented from Wearing Dresses ........... 38 d. Letter to Principals and Superintendents about Girls Being Prevented from Wearing Tuxes ............... 40 2 | P a g e e. Letter to Principals and Superintendents about the Right to Bring a Same-Sex Date to Prom ............. 41 f. Letter to Principals and Educators about LGBT Censorship in School.................................................... 42 g. Letter to School Officials about LGBT Student Privacy ........................................................................... 44 h. Letter to School Officials about Gay Straight Alliances .......................................................................... 46 XII. Model Policies ............................................................................................................................................... 50 i. Model School Anti-Bullying and Harassment Policy............................................................................... 51 ii. Model District Policy on Anti-Bullying and Harassment ......................................................................... 53 iii. Model District Policy on Transgender and Gender Nonconforming Students ....................................... 58 XII. Publishers ...................................................................................................................................................... 63 3 | P a g e Introduction: Why do we need LGBT curricula in the Mississippi Delta? Why create materials specific to the Mississippi Delta? Mississippi is steeped in culture. We are very proud of our music, our traditions, and our heritage and we hold strong to our systems of beliefs and values. Our feelings about Mississippi and how others feel about this state are very often reflected and revealed by images and experiences as deep and rich as the Mississippi Delta soil. Sometimes, our treasured values and traditions are often neglectful and rejecting of lesbian, gay, bi-sexual, and transgender [LGBT] members of our community. 1 Individuals identifying as LGBT represent 2.6% of Mississippi’s population. Mississippi also boast s the highest percentage (26%) of same sex couples raising children. Many of these people live in the 2 Mississippi Delta region. Amongst youth, about 5 - 7% identify as LGBT . These students are left alone attempting to strike a balance between familial beliefs and their personal identities. LGBT students are often harassed, ostracized, and criminalized. However, LGBT children are our children. They should not be left alone to fend for themselves or to navigate perilous systems. Like every other child, LGBT children in our communities must be made to feel safe. This guide is intended to be used as a reference to support the creation of safe spaces for LGBT students. The materials included within should be used as an advocacy tool for parents, students and advocates to encourage a community that is inclusive of LGBT diversity. Too often, LGBT students are subjected to discrimination and harassment, especially at school. Without a welcoming learning environment, there are significant consequences to a student’s sense of safety and ability to succeed in school. 1 "LGBT Percentage Highest in D.C., Lowest in North Dakota," State of the States, Gallup Politics (15 February 2013), available at http://www.gallup.com/poll/160517/lgbt-percentage-highest-lowest-north-dakota.aspx. 2 Center for American Progress, The Unfair Criminalization of Gay and Transgender Youth,” available at https://cdn.americanprogress.org/wp-content/uploads/issues/2012/06/pdf/juvenile_justice.pdf. 4 | P a g e I. Definitions: Importance of Maintaining an Updated, Respectful and Appropriate Vocabulary To build inclusive communities, it is essential to utilize a vocabulary that is respectful towards everyone. The words we use can shape attitudes towards LGBT issues, often unconsciously. For those who are afraid of saying the wrong thing, familiarity with these terms will make conversations easier. As individuals grow, they may change the words that they use to describe their own gender and sexuality. There is great variety on the spectrum of sexuality and gender. Because of these variations, our vocabulary is also expanding as we attempt to accurately describe our individual experiences. Therefore, it is critical to begin with a clear definition of sexuality and gender. Photographer Cathy Cade captured this moment in 1972. The movement to “abolish anti-gay” laws continues today but the vocabulary that is used to describe lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender people has expanded greatly in the 35 years since this photograph was taken. 5 | P a g e SEXUALITY: Sexuality is part of what makes us human. Our sexual orientation is comprehensive and multifaceted; it includes our physical, psychological and spiritual attraction to another person. Sexual Orientation is an inherent enduring emotional, romantic, sexual and relational attraction to another person. It may be a same-sex orientation, opposite-sex orientation or a bisexual orientation. Sexual Preference is what a person likes or prefers to do sexually; a conscious recognition or choice not to be confused with sexual orientation. Sexual preferences may change overtime and we must give room for people to express and explore their individual preferences as they learn to understand themselves better. GENDER: Gender is the range of characteristics pertaining to, and differentiating between, masculinity and femininity. Gender Identity is one’s personal sense of their gender. For transgender people, their birth-assigned sex and their own sense of gender identity do not match. Gender Identity is the gender you choose to identify as which may or may not correspond to the gender you were assigned at birth. Gender Expression is the external manifestation of one’s gender identity, usually expressed through masculine, feminine or gender-variant behavior, clothing, haircut, voice or body characteristics. LGBT The acronym “LGBT” is a common way to describe certain sexualities and genders. Here is a vocabulary list of terms to help us gain a better understanding of our human sexuality and gender: “L” stands for Lesbian: a female who is emotionally, romantically, sexually and relationally attracted to other females. “G” stands for Gay: Usually a male who is emotionally, romantically, sexually and relationally attracted to another male. Sometimes “gay” refers to both lesbians and gay people. “B” stands for Bi-sexual: a person attracted to more than one sex and/or gender though not necessarily attracted simultaneously or in the same way or to the same degree “T” stands for Transgender (not “Transgender-ed”): Transgender is an identification for a broad range of people who experience and/or express their gender differently from the norm or from the conventional. A transgender person has the right to say that they are neither a man nor a woman. Transgender status gives a person a space to declare that they are both a “man” and a “woman.” People have the right to choose or not to choose a particular gender. Any person can “be” transgender if that is how they understand themselves to be. Typically, transgender people seek to make their gender expression match their gender identity, rather than their birth-assigned sex. 6 | P a g e OTHER LETTERS USED IN ADDITION TO AND OR AS ALTERNATIVES TO “L G B T” “+” stands for the additional words that may be added to the end of “LGBT”, as in “LGBT+.” As our understanding evolves, our vocabulary expands. The “+” sign is a reminder that human sexuality and gender vary greatly from person to person. “Q” stands for Queer: Often used interchangeably with “LGBT.” Be mindful that the term may have negative or derogatory connotations for some people; however, many younger people are comfortable using it. “I” stands for Intersex: This is a general term that is used for a variety of conditions in which a person is born with a reproductive or sexual anatomy that doesn’t seem to fit the societal norms for male or female. “A” stands for Asexual: Is the lack of sexual attraction to anyone, or low or absent interest in sexual activity. “A” stands for Aromantic: Refers to the lack of romantic attraction or low interest in romantic activities. “P” stands for Pansexual: This is sexual attraction, romantic love, or emotional attraction toward people of any sex or gender identity. “SGL” stands for Same-Gender Loving: A term some prefer to use the letters “SGL” instead of “lesbian” or “gay” to express attraction to and love of people of the same gender. 7 | P a g e ADDITIONAL DEFINITIONS REALTED TO SEXUALITY AND GENDER Agender: Refers to people who identify outside of the gender binary. The word simply means having no gender. Ally: A person who supports and honors the diversity of sexual orientation, acts accordingly to challenge homophobic remarks and behaviors and explores and understands these forms of bias within him- or herself. Bigender: A gender identity that falls under the non-binary (non-binary refers to people who identify outside of the gender binary; identifies neither as a man or a woman.) umbrella. To identify as bigender generally, means you identify as two genders. You could identify as both at the same time. You can go back and forth between two genders. Biphobia: a range of negative attitudes, feelings or actions toward bisexuality/polysexuality and bisexual/polysexual people as a social group or as individuals. People may receive this treatment from both straight and gay people. Cisgender: a term for people whose gender identity matches their sex assigned at birth Cissexism: the system that privileges cisgender people over transgender people Coming Out: The process in which a person first acknowledges, accepts and appreciates his or her sexual orientation or gender identity and begins to share that with others. Gender Fluid: An overlap of, or indefinite lines between, gender identity; having two or more genders (being bigender, trigender, or pangender); having no gender (being agender, non-gendered, genderless, gender-free or neutrois); moving between genders or having a fluctuating gender identity Genderqueer: A person who does not subscribe to conventional gender distinctions but identifies with neither, both, or a combination of male and female genders Homophobia/Queerphobia: a range of negative attitudes, feelings and actions toward homosexuality or people who are identified or perceived as being lesbian, gay, bisexual or queer Heterosexism: the system that privileges heterosexual people over queer people Internalized Homophobia: Self-identification of societal stereotypes by an LGBT person, causing them to dislike and resent their sexual orientation or gender identity. Living Openly: A state in which LGBT people are comfortable about being out and open about their sexual orientation or gender identity – where and when it feels appropriate to them. Non-binary: Refers to people who identify outside of the gender binary; identifies neither as a man or a woman. 8 | P a g e PGP: preferred gender pronoun. This gender pronoun may or may not correspond to the gender assigned to the person at birth or with the gender pronoun that other people assign to the person. Outing: Exposing someone’s sexual orientation as being lesbian, gay, bisexual or transgender to others, without their permission; in essence “outing” them from the closet. Outing someone can have serious negative employment/economic/safety/religious repercussions in some situations. Transphobia: The fear and hatred of, or discomfort with, people whose gender identity or gender expression do not conform to cultural gender norms. Transsexual: A medical term describing people whose gender and sex do not line up, and who often seek medical treatment to bring their body and gender identity into alignment. Avoid using this term unless an individual self-identifies as transsexual Transmisogyny: the negative attitudes, expressed through cultural hate, individual and state violence, and discrimination directed toward trans women and feminine trans people Two Spirit: refers to an Indigenous person who feels their body simultaneously manifests both a masculine and a feminine spirit, or a different balance of masculine and feminine characteristics than usually seen in masculine men and feminine women. 9 | P a g e