The Resolution for Men Copyright © 2011 by Kendrick Bros., LLC All Rights Reserved Printed in the United States of America ISBN: 978-1-4336-7122-7 B&H Publishing Group Nashville, Tennessee Unless otherwise stated, Scripture is taken from the New American Standard Bible (NASB), © the Lockman Foundation, 1960, 1962, 1963, 1968, 1971, 1972, 1973, 1975, 1977; used by permission. Also used: The English Standard Version® (ESV), copyright © 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers. Used by permission. All rights reserved. Also used: The Holy Bible, New International Version (NIV), copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984 by International Bible Society. Also used: The New Living Translation (NLT), copyright 1996, 2004. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved. Also used: New King James Version (NKJV), copyright © 1979, 1980, 1982, Thomas Nelson, Inc., Publishers. Also used: King James Version (KJV). Dewey Decimal Classification: 248.842 Subject Heading: CHRISTIAN LIFE \ MEN \ LEADERSHIP 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 • 15 14 13 12 11 CONTENTS Introduction Part One: A Call to Men 1. Why We Need Men of Resolution 2. A Lifelong Vision of Fatherhood 3. Becoming a Chain Breaker Part Two: Committing to the Resolution 4. Resolve to Be a Man of Responsibility 5. Resolve to Lead Your Family 6. Resolve to Love Your Wife 7. Resolve to Bless Your Children 8. Resolve to Live with Honor 9. Resolve to Fight for Justice 10. Resolve to Demonstrate Love 11. Resolve to Provide for Your Family 12. Resolve to Reconcile with Your Past 13. Resolve to Live with Integrity 14. Resolve to Be Found Faithful 15. Resolve to Leave a Legacy Appendices 1. How Can I Find Peace with God? 2. Six Powerful Influences You Must Guard in Your Children’s Lives 3. Ten Potential Consequences of a Man Who Commits Adultery 4. Seven Steps to Better Sex 5. Resolution Groups: Accountability for Men 6. Scriptures to Memorize with Your Children 7. How to Pray for Your Family 8. Avoiding Pornography 9. Final Speech from Courageous Discussion Questions Notes Acknowledgments WEAK MEN WILL NOT BE ABLE TO HANDLE THE CONTENTS OF THIS BOOK. THE RESOLUTION IS NOT FOR THE FAINT OF HEART, AND THOSE WHO COMMIT TO IT WILL BE MORE ACCOUNTABLE IN THE FUTURE. YOU WILL BE CHALLENGED TO GET OUT OF YOUR COMFORT ZONE, WORK THROUGH HIDDEN ISSUES FROM YOUR PAST, AND MAKE STRATEGIC SACRIFICES FOR THE SAKE OF YOUR FAMILY AND YOUR FAITH. BUT THOSE WHO STEP UP TO THE CHALLENGE WILL FIND THAT LIVING OUT THE RESOLUTION WILL RADICALLY IMPACT THEIR PRIORITIES AND ASSIST THEM IN BECOMING STRONG MEN WHO ARE FOUND FAITHFUL. IT WILL TAKE COURAGE. BUT IT WILL BE WORTH IT. YOU’VE BEEN WARNED. INTRODUCTION This book is an unapologetic call for men to live courageously for their faith and their families. It is designed to strategically challenge you to become the man God created you to be. In the following pages, we will discuss God’s uniquely designed journey for a man from birth to death. We will talk about how to let go of the past, become a stronger spiritual leader in your home, win the hearts of your children, and pursue the ironclad character God wants to develop in each of us as men. Finally, we will challenge you to commit to living for God’s higher purposes in the form of a Resolution. We want you to experience the rewards that come from fearlessly embracing the responsibilities God has given to all men, regardless of any past mistakes— boldly living the life God intended right now and then leaving a strong legacy for many generations to come. Too many men sadly waste their lives. They don’t really know the God they claim to worship and have not ultimately concluded what they are living for. Halfhearted and indecisive, they spiritually wander through life in a fog of confusion and apathy. They can tell you what they’re doing this weekend, but they have no clue about their purpose in life or in eternity. As a result, they go through the motions day after day, wasting most of their time on trivial matters. At home, men are notorious for being oblivious to the huge leadership vacuum their passivity creates. They don’t realize how negatively their wives and children are affected by their lack of spiritual direction and leadership. But we don’t have to keep living this way. We can be inspired by the fact that great things happen when men wake up and step up. When a man finally understands his role and resolutely surrenders himself to God’s plan, his life completely changes. His priorities and vision become clear, and his life takes on a bold new purpose. He learns to say “no” to sinful and secondary things that hold him back, and keep his values and commitments strong no matter the circumstance. The Old Testament leader Joshua was a man of resolution. He knew who he was and what his responsibilities were. Time and again, his boldness, faith, and courage rallied the fearful, forgetful men of Israel to battle and conquest. Finally, standing before them near the end of his life, delivering a farewell address to his countrymen, his wholehearted resolve and commitment to God as the leader of his family still showed through. He said: If it is disagreeable in your sight to serve the LORD, choose for yourselves today whom you will serve: whether the gods which your fathers served which were beyond the River, or the gods of the Amorites in whose land you are living; but as for me and my house, we will serve the LORD. (Joshua 24:15) He wasn’t swayed by what the thousands of men around him decided to do. Whether or not they responded favorably to his challenge did not affect Joshua in the least. Even before they made their decisions, he was already resolute. “But as for me and my house . . .” Even if his house was the only one. Joshua’s words rise up from history and echo in our ears today. He asks us, “Where do you stand? Choose today! Stop wallowing and waiting. Stop shifting back and forth, sitting on the fence in your commitments. Make it clear where you stand! What are you waiting for?” Well, how would you answer that question right now? What is the status of your resolve compared to Joshua’s? If it falls short, then you have a decision to make. Will you launch out into the deep with God, or will you continue playing games in the shallow end? Are you going to follow the latest popular philosophies and take your chances, or will you wisely start dealing with the real issues of life? We believe there is a rising movement of men who are disgusted by their own mediocrity and dissatisfied with the weak standards of our dark culture. Men who desire to lock shields with other strong men and step up with courage to stand for Christ and their families like never before. Men who want to make the most of the rest of their days. Men who understand that eternity is too long for them to waste the remainder of their short time here on earth. Throughout history, men who lived incredible lives and left great legacies did it intentionally. They knew that men do not stumble upon integrity or accidentally find themselves being faithful to God. Passivity merely leads to