Middlesex University Research Repository An open access repository of Middlesex University research http://eprints.mdx.ac.uk Boyd, Carol A. (2013) Attachment and abandonment: a study of factors contributing to or hindering the development of trust and functional family behaviour. PhD thesis, Middlesex University / Oxford Centre for Mission Studies. [Thesis] Final accepted version (with author’s formatting) This version is available at: https://eprints.mdx.ac.uk/15774/ Copyright: MiddlesexUniversityResearchRepositorymakestheUniversity’sresearchavailableelectronically. Copyright and moral rights to this work are retained by the author and/or other copyright owners unlessotherwisestated. Theworkissuppliedontheunderstandingthatanyuseforcommercialgain is strictly forbidden. A copy may be downloaded for personal, non-commercial, research or study without prior permission and without charge. 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See also repository copyright: re-use policy: http://eprints.mdx.ac.uk/policies.html#copy ‘Attachment and Abandonment: A study of factors contributing to or hindering the development of trust and functional family behaviour’ Carol Boyd OCMS, Ph.D. Abstract This research examines the lives of individual children and adults of diverse ages and ethnicities, who suffer common and uncommon abandonment. The study employs a naturalistic “inquiry from the inside” approach and involves intensive participant observation on the part of the researcher. This allows a form of research to emerge that is longitudinal and dialogical. It includes the collection and analysis of the life histories of participants and allows for comparisons and shared experiences. The depth of involvement of the researcher in the participants’ lives, together with analysis of their experiences, combine to form a unique methodological model, generating a deeper and more nuanced understanding than commonly available of how the abandoned person views their world, while moving toward relational connection. Analysis of the life histories, field notes, observations and interviews, in concert with ethnographic field data, yield a progressive pattern of trust and development of relationship. In this process, the language, stages and steps of a non-clinical model of intervention emerges within the life experiences of the individual participants. The resulting paradigm applies most directly to individuals challenged by abandonment, and to their family structure, with the potential application for social agencies (governmental and non- governmental) and institutional models of care. The research offers two contributions to the field of study addressing the lived experience of formerly abandoned children and their families including: (1) extended understanding of the phenomenon of attachment through a holistic and dynamic approach to the attachment process, involving life history and ethnographic examination and (2) a coherent model of intervention revealing the development from abandonment to relational connection. This includes responses of the participant to availability and empathy, and reveals a progression from survival through vulnerability and trust, to authenticity and relational connection. ‘Attachment and Abandonment: A study of factors contributing to or hindering the development of trust and functional family behaviour’ By Carol A. Boyd B. S. (Bethany College) A thesis submitted in fulfilment of the degree of Doctor of Philosophy In Middlesex University September 2012 Oxford Centre for Mission Studies DEDICATION and ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS Jesus called a little child and set her in the midst of his disciples (Matthew: 18:2). This same friend of the child says to us that we are also welcome in His midst. I am grateful to Him who comes and values the child and the child in all of us. This is dedicated to Him and to them. Amongst those children is one I am particularly grateful to, my youngest of four, Fuxia who courageously chose to ‘walk’ with me as a participant on this long and arduous trek. Acknowledgement seems insufficient by definition in describing the gratitude I feel for the support I have received. First to my husband, David, whose unwavering support, consistent encouragement and determination when mine failed, kept me centred in purpose and drive. He has been and is an expression of Jesus to me. Words fail me. My adult children their spouses and my grandchildren have brought joy, respite and encouragement. They were willing to sacrifice grandma time and the support of their mom, missed birthday celebrations and extended time together when it was once again resident time in Oxford or travel somewhere in the world to be with my participants. They filled the margins of my life with words of encouragement, written notes and calls, always at the right time. I am deeply grateful to you…Gretchen, Aaron and Jon Marc. You made my commitment yours along with Josh, Noelani and Abby. My father, brother Ray and brother in law, Rich left this life during the research but Patti, my sister in law continued their legacy of reassurance. Encouragement and interest in a project of this nature is a lifeline and so many have extended that line to me. My father and mother’s persistent question of ‘are you finished’ was couched in thoughtfulness and concern from parents who have given unconditional love and support. Friendship is a gift and our friends Valerie and Barry Hon extended the meaning far beyond the commonly understood definition. I want to share my deepest appreciation for all of you who believed in and provided so many expressions of support during this amazing journey. The Veits, Günter and Connie, Chris and Jasmine have modelled authentic and life long friendship along with Hartmut and Dagmar von Schnurbein and a host of other German friends, all relationships that run deep and long. I am indebted to those friends who encouraged me to formalize my research and guided my early path. These include in particular the unwavering support and wise counsel of Gene Early and Matt and Celia Rawlins who consistently reminded me “you can do this” when I was struggling with anxiety and despair. Looking back my early attempts were more likely a greater challenge for you to read than for me to write. Additionally my appreciation goes to the many colleagues who have demonstrated i their support in prayer and reassurance including Loren and Darlene Cunningham, Howard Malmstadt, Rahel Wolfer, Robin Obriskie, Doug Coe, Dick Foth, Stan Holmes, Curt Richardson, Bill and Peggy Stoffregen, Edita Morgan, Donalda Thacker, Annalisa Parks, Dawn Heyn, Vicki Foster, Laurette Bennhold-Samaan, Muna Audi Zahr, Paula Kirby and John and Janice Nakamura and the encouraging hospitality of Jay and Terri Randall. I would be remiss not to express appreciation for the modelling of care for the abandoned and children at risk including Kit Ying Chan, Gary and Helen Stephens, Gu Ali and the staff of Mothers Choice and Radiant Hope, Steve and Marie Goode, Steve Bartel, Gail Maidment, Camille Bishop, Johann and Janette Lukasse, Janna Moats, Eva Spengler, Ed and Kay Morales, Philippa Laird, Method and Mary Kamanza and Marta and Demi Gabre-Tsadick. Making it down the home stretch would not have been possible without the assistance of Hilary Guest, Laura Grazier, Matt Davis and Bob Ainley. Also deep gratitude for the numerous acts of friendship and service to Bill and Ky Prevette, Damon and Ping So, Monsuk and Julie Ma, Andy Hartropp, David Singh, Brian Woolnough, Tom Harvey, Brenda Hoddinott, Ben Knighton and the staff of OCMS for providing guidance, counsel and support through to completion of the task. The warm welcomes from Carol Seward and Blanche Marslin, Ralph Bates and their efforts on my behalf meant so much to a weary scholar. Last but certainly not least, my gratitude goes to Bernard Farr and Fiona Bowie for their astute and sage counsel and friendship, provoking discussions and treasured encouragement along the way. My scholar mates have been a source of fun in the trying times. Jeannette Gaitou and Linda Lentz, it has been a privilege to walk together. Finally this research would have little meaning apart from the profound engagement of the participants and their families. The process of participant observation allows one the opportunity to know beyond information, to know a person deeply. I will always be grateful to the participants for opening their lives, and allowing me to be a friend. You are courageous and I am grateful. ii TABLE OF CONTENTS Dedication and Acknowledgements i Table of Contents iii Glossary viii Participants x 1 CHAPTER ONE – INTRODUCTION 1 1.1 Motivation and journey of a child development practitioner 5 1.2 Rationale for the research 12 1.3 Assumptions, research questions and methodology 15 1.4 Discoveries and changes in perspective 18 1.5 Recognition of limitations 21 1.6 Contribution of this research to an understanding of abandonment and the process of attachment 23 1.7 Summary and organization of the study 24 2 CHAPTER TWO – REVIEW OF LITERATURE ON ATTACHMENT 27 2.1 Introduction 27 2.2 History of attachment theory 29 2.3 Methodologies: strange situation measurement 31 2.3.1 Conclusions 33 2.3.2 Recommendation 33 2.4 Longitudinal study within the measurement paradigm 34 2.4.1 Conclusions 36 2.4.2 Recommendations 36 2.5 Wider view of exploration as the child develops 37 2.5.1 Secure exploration during the preschool years 38 2.5.2 Changes in the attachment system 39 2.5.3Conclusions 40 2.6 Patterns of attachment in the early school year 40 2.6.1 Conclusions 41 2.6.2 Recommendations 42 2.7 Attachment in middle childhood 42 2.7.1 Conclusions 44 2.7.2 Recommendations 44 2.8 Adolescent attachment representation at sixteen 44 2.8.1 Conclusions 47 2.8.2 Recommendation 47 2.9 Adult attachment 47 2.9.1 Theoretical issues of adult attachment 48 2.9.2 Conclusions 51 2.9.3 Recommendations 52 2.10 Influence and phases of attachment development 52 2.10.1 Conditioning influences 52 2.10.2 Phases of attachment development 53 2.10.3 Positive affects of a safe and secure centre in the child’s primary relationships 54 iii